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Author Topic: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)  (Read 1445774 times)

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RegionMom

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"Silly Sally went to town, walking backwards, upside down..."

not quite on the level of Impossible Patron Requests, but,

I am a piano teacher.  I received a transfer student from a friend teacher (there are three of us that teach out of one private school after hours)  My friend teacher basically told me, "good luck!"  Well, she was right- the girl has the most basic of basics fall out of her brain week to week.  I have students two years younger that have progressed well past her.   She NEVER does her practice/homework/worksheets/notebook/lessons/etc...

The mom told me that the other teacher was "mean."  So I was extra cautious to be "nice" and yes, the girl really likes me.  she is very sweet.  But cannot remember anything to save her life. 

I recently started her on a new lesson series just to get her on to something new, a fresh presentation of the basics.  The mom was excited that she was getting "more challenging work so she can progress." 

In actuality, I am stuck in a holding pattern.  Until the girl demonstrates that she can remember the most basic of info, that literally, my several kindergarten students have retained and at a much quicker rate, I cannot move this girl on.

Mom is happy that girl has new books/music.

even though I have shown her the dated pages re-assigned because still blank week after week, even though I write it dwon in the assignment notebook, mom's response is, "Oh, I do not know music so I cannot help her at all.  I just tell her to go to her room and practice.  She loves to play around on our keyboard!"

The "homework" might be, draw a line to match the symbol to the meaning.  Or, circle all the quarter notes you see.  Or, add a word to this lyric to make it rhyme. 
Or, you know, actually practice, like, do page 9 in Lesson Book, following outlined practice instructions, and complete Theory worksheet 5, use warm-up page 4 as a daily warm-up.  And yes, I mark the pages and have her do it in lesson time.  But then she goes home and does...nothing...and the next week's lesson is a complete review of the week prior.  And so on.

But, the mom thinks the new books will "challenge her so she will progress."

Not sure the books are magical. 

amazing how my students that do the work magically progress!  :)

Fear is temporary...Regret is forever.

NyaChan

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"Silly Sally went to town, walking backwards, upside down..."

not quite on the level of Impossible Patron Requests, but,

I am a piano teacher.  I received a transfer student from a friend teacher (there are three of us that teach out of one private school after hours)  My friend teacher basically told me, "good luck!"  Well, she was right- the girl has the most basic of basics fall out of her brain week to week.  I have students two years younger that have progressed well past her.   She NEVER does her practice/homework/worksheets/notebook/lessons/etc...

The mom told me that the other teacher was "mean."  So I was extra cautious to be "nice" and yes, the girl really likes me.  she is very sweet.  But cannot remember anything to save her life. 

I recently started her on a new lesson series just to get her on to something new, a fresh presentation of the basics.  The mom was excited that she was getting "more challenging work so she can progress." 

In actuality, I am stuck in a holding pattern.  Until the girl demonstrates that she can remember the most basic of info, that literally, my several kindergarten students have retained and at a much quicker rate, I cannot move this girl on.

Mom is happy that girl has new books/music.

even though I have shown her the dated pages re-assigned because still blank week after week, even though I write it dwon in the assignment notebook, mom's response is, "Oh, I do not know music so I cannot help her at all.  I just tell her to go to her room and practice.  She loves to play around on our keyboard!"

The "homework" might be, draw a line to match the symbol to the meaning.  Or, circle all the quarter notes you see.  Or, add a word to this lyric to make it rhyme. 
Or, you know, actually practice, like, do page 9 in Lesson Book, following outlined practice instructions, and complete Theory worksheet 5, use warm-up page 4 as a daily warm-up.  And yes, I mark the pages and have her do it in lesson time.  But then she goes home and does...nothing...and the next week's lesson is a complete review of the week prior.  And so on.

But, the mom thinks the new books will "challenge her so she will progress."

Not sure the books are magical. 

amazing how my students that do the work magically progress!  :)

That sounds like a parent who likes the idea of saying her child plays the piano to others and a kid who has little real interest in it.  That would drive me bonkers o_0

Jones

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.
“A real desire to believe all the good you can of others and to make others as comfortable as you can will solve most of the problems.” CS Lewis

greencat

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Would it help to tell the *parent* after each lesson "Sally has to do this book work.  If she doesn't have it done before the next lesson period, she will spend the lesson time doing that book work instead of progressing."

Margo

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

My younger sister started piano lessons because the Ed. Psych said she would benefit from dping something which she would find frustrating! (I assume frustrating as is 'you actually have to work to learn it, you can't just sit down and do it right the very first .)

Of course, the rest of the family found it quite frustrating to start with, too...

Luci

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If mom can't "help" with the homework, mom could ask the student to teach mom theory while the information is fresh in the child's mind as she does her papers. Sometimes that helps. I found being a tutor solidified stuff in my brain.

Sometimes, the student isn't wired for music theory (or math) and nothing will help.

We have learned over the years that by "helping" with homework, to some it means doing it rather than guiding.

MissRose

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

I could NEVER read music to save my hide.  Good thing I never had to use that skill in real life! 


Slartibartfast

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

I could NEVER read music to save my hide.  Good thing I never had to use that skill in real life!

I've always seen reading music (not piano necessarily, just music in general) kind of like swimming: once you know how, you can't fathom how some other people can't.  If you've never learned, though, it's a complete mystery why some people can be so casual about knowing it  :P

I do think a lot of adults know "notes on top sound higher than the notes on the bottom" - but there's a pretty wide gulf between that and actually *reading* music.

Elfmama

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My younger sister started piano lessons because the Ed. Psych said she would benefit from doing something which she would find frustrating! (I assume frustrating as is 'you actually have to work to learn it, you can't just sit down and do it right the very first .)
:o :o :o   Then the Ed. Psych uses "frustrating" in a completely different fashion than the rest of the English-speaking world. 

frus·trate transitive verb \ˈfrəs-ˌtrāt\ 
: to cause (someone) to feel angry, discouraged, or upset because of not being able to do something
: to prevent (efforts, plans, etc.) from succeeding
: to keep (someone) from doing something

 Why in the world would you want your child to be angry, discouraged, and upset? How could that possibly benefit her?

Maybe the word they wanted is "challenging."
« Last Edit: March 25, 2014, 11:35:08 AM by Elfmama »
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you have to deal with all the people who don't have it.
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Jones

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^^^ That's definitely how I felt during my piano lessons! I got strong fingers out of it and still can't read the hymnal, lol.
“A real desire to believe all the good you can of others and to make others as comfortable as you can will solve most of the problems.” CS Lewis

Luci

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My younger sister started piano lessons because the Ed. Psych said she would benefit from doing something which she would find frustrating! (I assume frustrating as is 'you actually have to work to learn it, you can't just sit down and do it right the very first .)
:o :o :o   Then the Ed. Psych uses "frustrating" in a completely different fashion than the rest of the English-speaking world. 

frus·trate transitive verb \ˈfrəs-ˌtrāt\ 
: to cause (someone) to feel angry, discouraged, or upset because of not being able to do something
: to prevent (efforts, plans, etc.) from succeeding
: to keep (someone) from doing something

 Why in the world would you want your child to be angry, discouraged, and upset? How could that possibly benefit her?

Maybe the word they wanted is "challenging."

Our daughter received her first B in college. Seriously! She was very, very upset. We honestly felt it was kind of a help for her to see what she considered a failure. She was never cocky or snotty about her straight A forever as a child or young adult, but she still needed to feel "failure", as she saw it.

Why did we see it that way? I can't articulate the reason.

whatsanenigma

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My younger sister started piano lessons because the Ed. Psych said she would benefit from doing something which she would find frustrating! (I assume frustrating as is 'you actually have to work to learn it, you can't just sit down and do it right the very first .)
:o :o :o   Then the Ed. Psych uses "frustrating" in a completely different fashion than the rest of the English-speaking world. 

frus·trate transitive verb \ˈfrəs-ˌtrāt\ 
: to cause (someone) to feel angry, discouraged, or upset because of not being able to do something
: to prevent (efforts, plans, etc.) from succeeding
: to keep (someone) from doing something

 Why in the world would you want your child to be angry, discouraged, and upset? How could that possibly benefit her?

Maybe the word they wanted is "challenging."

Our daughter received her first B in college. Seriously! She was very, very upset. We honestly felt it was kind of a help for her to see what she considered a failure. She was never cocky or snotty about her straight A forever as a child or young adult, but she still needed to feel "failure", as she saw it.

Why did we see it that way? I can't articulate the reason.

Maybe it was exactly because she was never cocky or snotty about it- was she the type who was always worried about getting an A, never with any confidence that she would, but terrified of the consequences if she didn't? (I'm not saying that even if she did feel that way, it had anything to do with you, it's just that some people sometimes do that.)

Because then maybe, it's the confirmation that it's "safe" to get less than an A, that life will go on and she can relax.  Because I know that is pretty much what I went through as a younger person, so if that's the case, I can relate.

(I still wouldn't advocate deliberately setting a child up for "failure", what the rest of the world considers "failure" or not.)

Yvaine

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

I could NEVER read music to save my hide.  Good thing I never had to use that skill in real life!

I've always seen reading music (not piano necessarily, just music in general) kind of like swimming: once you know how, you can't fathom how some other people can't.  If you've never learned, though, it's a complete mystery why some people can be so casual about knowing it  :P

I do think a lot of adults know "notes on top sound higher than the notes on the bottom" - but there's a pretty wide gulf between that and actually *reading* music.

I played percussion as a kid and so I can read music for rhythm, but not for pitch. I know how long each note lasts, but not what pitch corresponds to what line of the staff.

Kaymyth

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

I could NEVER read music to save my hide.  Good thing I never had to use that skill in real life!

I've always seen reading music (not piano necessarily, just music in general) kind of like swimming: once you know how, you can't fathom how some other people can't.  If you've never learned, though, it's a complete mystery why some people can be so casual about knowing it  :P

I do think a lot of adults know "notes on top sound higher than the notes on the bottom" - but there's a pretty wide gulf between that and actually *reading* music.

Not to mention the fact that each instrument is almost its own "dialect" of music.  It's very strange.  If I have a flute in my hands, I can read the super-high ledger lines over the treble clef without the slightest problem.  Switch out for an oboe, and it's suddenly a strange mess of floating notes.

Hillia

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I was in piano 12 years and, although I progressed, it was slow and painful. I had a very difficult time "getting" music, my brain just doesn't work that way. It irks me today when I hear other mothers talking about how their kids simply have to learn piano because if they don't, the kids will never succeed in life (paraphrased). But, yeah, the least the kid could do is work in the piano theory book.

I could NEVER read music to save my hide.  Good thing I never had to use that skill in real life!

I've always seen reading music (not piano necessarily, just music in general) kind of like swimming: once you know how, you can't fathom how some other people can't.  If you've never learned, though, it's a complete mystery why some people can be so casual about knowing it  :P

I do think a lot of adults know "notes on top sound higher than the notes on the bottom" - but there's a pretty wide gulf between that and actually *reading* music.

Not to mention the fact that each instrument is almost its own "dialect" of music.  It's very strange.  If I have a flute in my hands, I can read the super-high ledger lines over the treble clef without the slightest problem.  Switch out for an oboe, and it's suddenly a strange mess of floating notes.

Never mind bass clef.

I was in band for years and a decent clarinetist, but I never learned any of the theory - keys were (and are) a deep mystery to me.