My favorite impossible request -
Them: 'Hi, I need you to walk me through task on the computer.'
Me: 'Okay, do ____ and tell me what you see on the screen'
Them: 'Oh, I'm not at my computer/home/etc....'
LOL! Yes, I used to have that client too, when I worked phone support.
Me: Hi, Company Name, Frog speaking.
Client: Hi, Frog, this is client.... my computer's not working again. I can't get into my database.
(I knew the client by her voice, and knew this would be good.)
Me: Okay, let's walk through this. Are you at the computer now?
(With this client I knew to ALWAYS ask this question)
Client: No, I'm in the bath tub. But here's the problem. (She explains the problem.) And it didn't do any of that before my electrician worked on my computer.
Me: You let your electrician work on your computer?!!
Client: Yes, he saw the movie "Pay it Forward" and now troubleshoots my computer for me for free.
Me: *face palm* *headdesk*