Author Topic: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)  (Read 610475 times)

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ladyknight1

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3090 on: November 17, 2013, 06:44:03 PM »
Space: The Final Frontier

I could go on.  :D

Slartibartfast

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Jocelyn

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3092 on: November 17, 2013, 07:24:50 PM »
When I was at uni full-time, I did 26 hours a week in lectures and lab time alone - plus hours of homework, revision, travelling too and from etc.  I did wonder how American students managed to earn a living at the same time as studying full-time, I had assumed they did similar hours.
What we call 'hours' are perhaps more properly called 'credits'. You must have 120 hours (or a few more) to graduate with a bachelor's degree. A 3 credit hour class typically means you attend lecture 3 hours a week. Back in my day, you were expected to study the same number of hours studying, although now more students claim that they are studying much less than that. So yes, the average US student is in class much less than 26 hours a week. 12 hours in class, 12 hours of studying, and 30 hours a week on a job still makes a busy week.

Dindrane

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3093 on: November 17, 2013, 07:27:44 PM »
Can we move the discussion about higher education to a different thread? It's moved rather far away from the topic of this one.


Twik

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3094 on: November 17, 2013, 08:45:27 PM »
You could tell them: Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.

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Winterlight

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3096 on: November 18, 2013, 08:28:35 AM »
You could tell them: Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.

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Yarnspinner

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3097 on: November 18, 2013, 11:05:05 AM »
I think we're getting off-topic.

I had a call the other day from someone who informed me she wanted information on space.

Anything in particular?

No, just space. /eyeroll

I finally managed to narrow her down to an actual topic, but there was definitely some blinking going on for a minute.

Winterlight, you are a hero for getting her down to what she really wanted. There are days I would rather take on the twelve labors of Hercules than try to narrow a topic down to what the patron really wants.  Among my favorites:

1) The girls who had been given fifteen books on hurricanes and tornados to research a project about tornados.  They kept coming back to complain that they didn't want to have to read the chapters on hurricanes and didn't we just have books on tornados.  The concept of skipping the chapter was completely alien to them.

2) The girl who was writing a research paper on rape.  She was given all the requisite magazine articles and books we had.  Then she kept coming to the desk asking that we take scissors and remove all paragraphs that didn't use the word rape.  Apparently if the word wasn't in the paragraph, then it clearly had nothing to do with the topic.

3) "I want everything on the civil war"  (We don't even bother asking which one any more, since, to our patrons, there was only one Civil War).  This particular question is used by a training program for improving reference performance.  It's quite refreshing in many ways and helps you refocus on getting to the heart of things....but the trainers use a script that makes me want to cry as it doesn't actually work like that in real life.

The Script:

Librarian:  What can I help you with?
Patron: I want everything on The Civil War.
Lib: Hm, that covers a large area.  Can you narrow it down for me?
Pat: The U.S. Civil War.
Lib: That's still a big topic.  Can you tell me what interests you?
Pat: Well, I saw Matthew Brady's photos of field hospitals and I am really interested in knowing more about it.
Lib: So you want to know more about how field hospitals operated during the U.S. Civil War.
Pat: Yes, that's it exactly!

Compare with the interview in real life:

Lib: What can I help you find today?
Patron: I want everything you got on the Civil War.
Lib: Well, that's a pretty wide topic.  Can you narrow it down a little?
Patron: Everything on the Civil War.
Lib: Well, I can get you several books on the general aspects of the war and--
Pat: Not "aspects" I want all the books you got on the war.
Lib: That's a lot of books.  Isn't this assignment supposed to be about one aspect of the war?  Isn't there an area you are particularly interested in?
Pat: I want everything on the U.S. Civil War!  I don't go time to argue!  Just get me everything you got!
Librarian brings half a dozen books on the war to the patron.
Patron storms back.
Pat: This book is about how the war got started!  I told you I want everything on the war!  Everything!
Librarian gets more books.
Pat: (now really mad) I want to read about the %$#^in' field hospitals and you didn't bring me nothing about them!
Lib: I did ask you if there was an area you were interested in and you told me everything.  You'll need to check the indexes for...
Pat: You guys never help me at all!  You're supposed to be helping me get what I want!  I HATE this library!  (storms out)

Librarian is left wishing that a small blue police call box would materialize and take her away.  Anywhere.

BarensMom

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3098 on: November 18, 2013, 11:07:51 AM »
I think we're getting off-topic.

I had a call the other day from someone who informed me she wanted information on space.

Anything in particular?

No, just space. /eyeroll

I finally managed to narrow her down to an actual topic, but there was definitely some blinking going on for a minute.

Winterlight, you are a hero for getting her down to what she really wanted. There are days I would rather take on the twelve labors of Hercules than try to narrow a topic down to what the patron really wants.  Among my favorites:

1) The girls who had been given fifteen books on hurricanes and tornados to research a project about tornados.  They kept coming back to complain that they didn't want to have to read the chapters on hurricanes and didn't we just have books on tornados.  The concept of skipping the chapter was completely alien to them.

2) The girl who was writing a research paper on rape.  She was given all the requisite magazine articles and books we had.  Then she kept coming to the desk asking that we take scissors and remove all paragraphs that didn't use the word rape.  Apparently if the word wasn't in the paragraph, then it clearly had nothing to do with the topic.

3) "I want everything on the civil war"  (We don't even bother asking which one any more, since, to our patrons, there was only one Civil War).  This particular question is used by a training program for improving reference performance.  It's quite refreshing in many ways and helps you refocus on getting to the heart of things....but the trainers use a script that makes me want to cry as it doesn't actually work like that in real life.

The Script:

Librarian:  What can I help you with?
Patron: I want everything on The Civil War.
Lib: Hm, that covers a large area.  Can you narrow it down for me?
Pat: The U.S. Civil War.
Lib: That's still a big topic.  Can you tell me what interests you?
Pat: Well, I saw Matthew Brady's photos of field hospitals and I am really interested in knowing more about it.
Lib: So you want to know more about how field hospitals operated during the U.S. Civil War.
Pat: Yes, that's it exactly!

Compare with the interview in real life:

Lib: What can I help you find today?
Patron: I want everything you got on the Civil War.
Lib: Well, that's a pretty wide topic.  Can you narrow it down a little?
Patron: Everything on the Civil War.
Lib: Well, I can get you several books on the general aspects of the war and--
Pat: Not "aspects" I want all the books you got on the war.
Lib: That's a lot of books.  Isn't this assignment supposed to be about one aspect of the war?  Isn't there an area you are particularly interested in?
Pat: I want everything on the U.S. Civil War!  I don't go time to argue!  Just get me everything you got!
Librarian brings half a dozen books on the war to the patron.
Patron storms back.
Pat: This book is about how the war got started!  I told you I want everything on the war!  Everything!
Librarian gets more books.
Pat: (now really mad) I want to read about the %$#^in' field hospitals and you didn't bring me nothing about them!
Lib: I did ask you if there was an area you were interested in and you told me everything.  You'll need to check the indexes for...
Pat: You guys never help me at all!  You're supposed to be helping me get what I want!  I HATE this library!  (storms out)

Librarian is left wishing that a small blue police call box would materialize and take her away.  Anywhere.

Actually if the small blue police call box did appear, you could have it take the patron to the Civil War.  Problem solved!

momof2weenies

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3099 on: November 18, 2013, 12:18:26 PM »
Snip . . .
Librarian brings half a dozen books on the war to the patron.
Patron storms back.
Pat: This book is about how the war got started!  I told you I want everything on the war!  Everything!
Librarian gets more books.
Pat: (now really mad) I want to read about the %$#^in' field hospitals and you didn't bring me nothing about them!
Lib: I did ask you if there was an area you were interested in and you told me everything.  You'll need to check the indexes for...
Pat: You guys never help me at all!  You're supposed to be helping me get what I want!  I HATE this library!  (storms out)

Librarian is left wishing that a small blue police call box would materialize and take her away.  Anywhere.

Actually if the small blue police call box did appear, you could have it take the patron to the Civil War and leave them there .  Problem solved!

Fixed that for ya  ;)
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daen

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3100 on: November 18, 2013, 03:04:06 PM »
Snip . . .
Librarian brings half a dozen books on the war to the patron.
Patron storms back.
Pat: This book is about how the war got started!  I told you I want everything on the war!  Everything!
Librarian gets more books.
Pat: (now really mad) I want to read about the %$#^in' field hospitals and you didn't bring me nothing about them!
Lib: I did ask you if there was an area you were interested in and you told me everything.  You'll need to check the indexes for...
Pat: You guys never help me at all!  You're supposed to be helping me get what I want!  I HATE this library!  (storms out)

Librarian is left wishing that a small blue police call box would materialize and take her away.  Anywhere.

Actually if the small blue police call box did appear, you could have it take the patron to the Civil War and leave them there .  Problem solved!

Fixed that for ya  ;)

Please don't tease me. I know it won't happen.  :'(

Elfmama

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3101 on: November 18, 2013, 03:18:55 PM »
My library patron wanted a photograph of Cleopatra.  Not a photo of her traditional portrait bust or her portrait on a coin, which was as close as she was going to get.  A photo of ALL of her.  It took a good 20 minutes to snaffle out that she wanted to go to a costume party dressed as Cleopatra.   ::)
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diesel_darlin

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3102 on: November 18, 2013, 04:39:34 PM »
I work as a clerk in a gas station.

Customer: I need 20 bucks worth. *throws 20 on counter*

Me: Do you need gas? What pump are you on?

Customer: I don't know; I didn't look.

Me: ok, what do you drive?

Customer: white car.

Look at the pumps, see several white cars, and proceed to fight urge to beat my head on the counter.




BarensMom

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3103 on: November 18, 2013, 05:10:26 PM »
My library patron wanted a photograph of Cleopatra.  Not a photo of her traditional portrait bust or her portrait on a coin, which was as close as she was going to get.  A photo of ALL of her.  It took a good 20 minutes to snaffle out that she wanted to go to a costume party dressed as Cleopatra.   ::)

Tell her the TARDIS will be happy to take her to ancient Egypt as soon as it returns from the Civil War.  >:D

Thipu1

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Re: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)
« Reply #3104 on: November 18, 2013, 06:04:59 PM »
The problem there is that the real Cleopatra VII probably rarely, if ever, dressed like Liz Taylor in the 1963 movie. 

Cleopatra VII was Greek and would have dressed like the aristocratic Greek woman she was.  She would have been dressed modestly with a Psyche knot at the back of her head.

Sorry, honey.  She wouldn't have been caught dead wearing a tri-partite wig and a golden headdress of the sort Egyptologists call the 'dead chicken'.