Author Topic: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart  (Read 784743 times)

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mmswm

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5700 on: November 16, 2014, 07:31:16 PM »
DS and I are sick, so our house is full of snot and tissues.

I am too.  I am SO over this crap.  I finally got the doctor to put me on antibiotics.  Unfortunately, my sense of smell is starting to come back.  The farts are amazingly awful.  ::)

Our house is a disaster.  We have:

-BF had yet a third operation for kidney stones last Tuesday in attempt to de-stone his kidneys.  They got 6 more stones, but early Friday evening he started having major pain issues again, and the ER confirmed that there are at least 4-6 more in the left kidney.

-Speaking of ER's, I had to have bf's daughter relieve me at the ER where bf was so yet another friend could take me to a different ER (my insurance wasn't accepted at the hospital where bf was).  That resulted in being admitted to have emergency gallbladder removal surgery

-Oldest DS was diagnosed with impetigo last Sunday.  He's been on antibiotics and is healing nicely, but not quite fully healed yet.

-BF's DD was diagnosed with strep throat yesterday morning.

-Middle DS was diagnosed with impetigo *and* cellulitis yesterday evening (that was fun, since bf took him to urgent care and there were all sorts of monkey dance acts that had to take place to get him treated since I was hospitalized).

-I came home from the hospital today and am pretty much useless.

Poor youngest DS.  He's 12, and depending on the day uses a cane/walker/wheelchair due to pain caused by skeletal deformities and he's the healthiest person in the house.

And speaking of farts, BF told me he thought about sleeping downstairs one day last week because I was farting him out of the bedroom while I slept.  Ooooops.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

ladyknight1

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5701 on: November 16, 2014, 08:24:52 PM »
I'm so glad they finally did something for your abdominal pain. DH didn't stop to eat since breakfast, so he was near fainting, I heated up leftovers for him. DS doesn't have any interest in food, so I'm just going to put some water by his bed and going to eat leftovers myself. At least I have everything for soup tomorrow and will get antibiotics for both of us tomorrow.

Hollanda

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5702 on: November 20, 2014, 10:09:53 AM »
The Baffling Case of the Missing Phlegm
 
I have a cough.  Not just any cough.  A fruity,  rattling, barking, honking, productive cough.  This is not just a cough.  It's an M&S cough. Anyway.   This cough has some serious clout and sounds impressive, especially first thing in the morning.
 
This morning, I coughed and immediately rushed to the bathroom to honk up some phlegm.  I felt it and tasted it leave my mouth.  But where did it go? It wasn't in the toilet.  It wasn't on the floor.
 
I was actually at work when my hand touched my hair and froze.  A golf ball sized chunk of yellow phlegm was stuck. In. My. Hair. Fighting the urge to puke, laugh or both, I sprinted to the toilet and rinsed it out before returning to my desk.
 
Seriously, though. Who else would that happen to but me?!!!
Knowledge is knowing tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.


ladyknight1

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5703 on: November 20, 2014, 10:13:54 AM »
Mine usually ends up on my frontal shelf, but I could totally see that happen to me.

DH and DS are getting better, but still comparing phlegm for color and consistency.

Moonie

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5704 on: November 20, 2014, 10:44:39 AM »
 I have a lovely Russian Blue kitty named Ziggy. He has the horrible habit of "wiping" his butt on my carpet. It isn't a regular thing, but sometimes it's like he has digested a lot of fur, and instead of coughing up a hairball, it comes out the other end, resulting in a "clingon" that he proceeds to scoot off his butt onto the carpet.
 Yesterday morning I was in a hurry to leave, and as I reached the front door, I see a two and a half foot black streak on the carpet. Yep, it was a poop strip. I didn't have time to get it up then, so when I got home had to get a scrub brush and brush it up. Thank goodness, it wasn't too thick, and basically turned to dust when brushed. Then I could vacuum and use the carpet cleaner on it.
 I know he can't really help it, but it's gross. Whenever we happen to catch him doing it, we holler, "Wiper, No Wiping!!!" (As in "Swiper, No swiping!" from Dora the Explorer).

siamesecat2965

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5705 on: November 20, 2014, 02:38:25 PM »
Not nearly as gross as some of these, but every now and then, my allergies get the best of me. This spring, they were pretty bad. So I as blowing my nose all the time, and huge hunks of snot would fly out. I swear, no matter how careful I was to blow into the tissue, and leave no gaps, each and every time, a chunk would end up on my hand, chin, cheek. or somewhere other than the tissue.

jedikaiti

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5706 on: November 20, 2014, 10:12:35 PM »
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

Reika

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #5707 on: November 20, 2014, 10:28:38 PM »
I saw this and thought of this thread...

23 Reasons Why Getting Your Period Is Worse Than The Apocalypse

Some of those were...umm, well. EW.

The rest were sooo true.