Author Topic: Uh.. ya, don't do that....  (Read 493555 times)

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dawbs

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2970 on: January 21, 2014, 04:51:27 PM »
As a Michiganian, I'm feeling your pain, Copper Horsewoman. I've done that dance myself in the past.

Also, I often joke that the reason I stay here in this state despite the snow is that our winters keep our spiders to a reasonable size.  :D

I haven't told my husband about the size of the spider I killed while he was out shoveling this week (he has a phobia--he prefers I don't tell him).

Since I'm the softie toward spiders, I thought for a moment about putting it outside, then the smarter part of my brain remembered it was 7 degrees F outside...the squishing was probably more humane.


wonderfullyanonymous

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2971 on: January 21, 2014, 05:12:45 PM »
As a Michiganian, I'm feeling your pain, Copper Horsewoman. I've done that dance myself in the past.

Also, I often joke that the reason I stay here in this state despite the snow is that our winters keep our spiders to a reasonable size.  :D

I haven't told my husband about the size of the spider I killed while he was out shoveling this week (he has a phobia--he prefers I don't tell him).

Since I'm the softie toward spiders, I thought for a moment about putting it outside, then the smarter part of my brain remembered it was 7 degrees F outside...the squishing was probably more humane.


He would have probably froze and then thawed out come spring.

hermanne

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2972 on: January 21, 2014, 10:16:21 PM »
When going out while it's snowing, put your hood up before heading out. If you forget and put it up after being out for a while, don't be surprised by the sudden cold shock that falls down the back of your neck.
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alkira6

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2973 on: January 22, 2014, 11:43:21 AM »
Don't turn your thermostat down to 55 during the day to save money and then when you come home at 8 pm and it's 16 F outside DO NOT put on sweats, wool hiking socks, and a hat and turn the thermostat up to 80 F to heat up the house.  You will fall asleep and both you and your husband will wake up at 2 am gasping for air and so drenched in sweat that you have to change the sheets and remove the innermost blanket.

OSUJillyBean

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2974 on: January 22, 2014, 02:45:00 PM »
Don't forget a bag of birdseed on your backporch overnight if your apartment backs up to a wooded area.  The juvenile raccoon will thank you for the feast as he gorges himself but your cat will spend the next two hours trying to teleport through the glass to chase off the intruder.

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Outdoor Girl

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2975 on: January 22, 2014, 02:50:06 PM »
Never mind a wooded area behind you; that kind of stuff happens in a full fledged urban environment.  I've taken to calling raccoons '(sub)urban commandos'.

Along that same line, don't leave the meat wrappings in a garbage bag out on the back deck or you might find a critter nose first into the thing.  Imagine my surprise to look out one night and see an opossum in the bag!  I live in Canada - I didn't even know we had possums up here at that time.  They've migrated considerably north in the last few years but I would imagine the poor buggers are getting their tails frozen off this winter.  -30C this morning and not for the first time.  (-22F)
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wonderfullyanonymous

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2976 on: January 22, 2014, 03:27:14 PM »
A friend of mine feeds the strays cats around her home. She would go out at night, call here kitty kitty, and the strays would come and eat. Much to her surprise one night, one of the kitty kitty calls was answered with an opossum joining the cats.

Her husband was out there with her on that night, and she says, should I pet him. He yells,  "NNNOOOO" at her.


From then on, opossum was called KittyKitty, whenever I asked about him. Kittykitty would hibernate in her shed, where he made a bed of grass and rags.

When she hadn't seen Kittykitty for a few nights, she went looking for him in his bed, and found him passed away over the summer.

AfleetAlex

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2977 on: January 22, 2014, 03:30:55 PM »
Aw, she sounds like my kind of person. That was sweet of her to give KittyKitty a place to live.
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Elfmama

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2978 on: January 22, 2014, 04:36:18 PM »
A friend of mine feeds the strays cats around her home. She would go out at night, call here kitty kitty, and the strays would come and eat. Much to her surprise one night, one of the kitty kitty calls was answered with an opossum joining the cats.

Her husband was out there with her on that night, and she says, should I pet him. He yells,  "NNNOOOO" at her.


From then on, opossum was called KittyKitty, whenever I asked about him. Kittykitty would hibernate in her shed, where he made a bed of grass and rags.

When she hadn't seen Kittykitty for a few nights, she went looking for him in his bed, and found him passed away over the summer.
I'm impressed. Most of them don't live long enough to die in bed. We see them alongside the road a lot.  When a small animal argues with a car or truck, the vehicle wins.
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Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2979 on: January 22, 2014, 07:11:42 PM »
A friend of mine feeds the strays cats around her home. She would go out at night, call here kitty kitty, and the strays would come and eat. Much to her surprise one night, one of the kitty kitty calls was answered with an opossum joining the cats.

Her husband was out there with her on that night, and she says, should I pet him. He yells,  "NNNOOOO" at her.


From then on, opossum was called KittyKitty, whenever I asked about him. Kittykitty would hibernate in her shed, where he made a bed of grass and rags.

When she hadn't seen Kittykitty for a few nights, she went looking for him in his bed, and found him passed away over the summer.
I'm impressed. Most of them don't live long enough to die in bed. We see them alongside the road a lot.  When a small animal argues with a car or truck, the vehicle wins.

We had a trio of siblings in our back porch garbage can... as far as we could tell, their mother had them there, figured they had enough food, and moved on.  Cute little fellas, and they hiss adorably.
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Outdoor Girl

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2980 on: January 22, 2014, 07:12:49 PM »
Possums are in the 'so ugly, they're cute' category for me.
I have CDO.  It is like OCD but with the letters in alphabetical order, as they should be.
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JoW

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2981 on: January 22, 2014, 09:01:49 PM »
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To prove to the possum that it could be done.

Thats my favorite southerner (US) joke. 

In the southeastern US everyone knows that the possum's most important natural enemy is the automobile.  When I lived in that area my commute to work was about 11 miles.  Most trips I would pass 4or 5 dead possums.  By the time one decayed and was no longer recognizable another would get hit. 

Mel the Redcap

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2982 on: January 24, 2014, 05:39:00 PM »
Australia has possums too ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_brushtail_possum ) though if you ask me they're cuter than the American ones. :P My mum certainly thinks so, which brings us to why I'm posting on this thread...

First, for background: Mum has Views-with-a-capital-V on keeping native/wild animals as pets, Views that she'll happily go on about whenever it comes up. Those Views are that native animals should not be kept as pets, because it's cruel and unfair to confine them; humans should just leave them strictly alone and observe them from a distance without interfering with their lives. She has the same Views about keeping birds in cages, so when I had a couple of native birds as pets I got the lecture about how I should release my pets into the wild on a regular basis. (Me: "Mum, they were bred in captivity and have never had to forage for food or avoid predators. Flambe can't even fly properly. They'd last a week if they were unlucky." Mum: "I still think it would be kinder to let them go!")

When a possum moved into a tree right next to her house, she was delighted. Here was her chance to observe unspoiled nature!

Then she started leaving fruit out for it.
Then she started leaving bread and honey out for it.
Then she started going out and hand-feeding it bread and honey.

Me: "Mum, it's not a good idea to get it used to the idea that humans are a food source. You're also getting it used to your cats."
Mum: "Oh, it'll be fine, it's just a little bread!"
Me: "Speaking of which, I'm pretty sure white bread and honey are not good for possums."
Mum: "...Yeah... I guess... well, maybe it'll live a slightly shorter life on this diet, but it's okay because it likes it so much! I'm making it happy!"
Me: ??? "Whatever happened to leaving wild animals alone?"
Mum: "Oh it's just a possum. And it's cute."
Me: "My birds were cute."
Mum: "That was different."

I stopped talking to her about her 'pet' possum, and just made "mmm-hmm" noises when she brought it up, which was frequently. ::) Then one evening, she went out to feed the possum, didn't immediately see it, and was standing under the tree with bread and honey in her hand, making 'pss-pss-pss' noises to call it... and it turned out that the possum was not up the tree. It was down on the ground, behind her, and it grabbed her leg.

Possums, like many other animals that climb trees, have big sharp claws. If they're panicked - or, purely hypothetically, if they're not scared of you and you're holding a piece of bread and honey - they have been known to climb people, with messy and painful results. Luckily for Mum, her reflex action was to drop the bread, and the possum let go to get its dinner.

Mum: "Wild animals should be left alone! I'm going to keep leaving fruit out on the tree, but bread and honey is bad for possums. Also it would be a bad idea to get it used to humans, so I won't hand-feed it."
Me: "Uh-huh." 8)
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Mel the Redcap

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2983 on: January 24, 2014, 06:08:29 PM »
Ooh! Ooh! I just now have a brand new one, courtesy of the Good Ethnic Boy!

Say you store your cans of Coke Zero in the garage, and as a result they're a bit warm when you bring them into the house (summer here). Say your usual method of dealing with this is putting them in the freezer for half an hour to speed-chill them. Say you usually also set a timer to go off when you plan to take them out, to make sure you don't forget. Say you usually remember even without the timer.

Don't decide that you don't need the timer. You will forget, and you will leave two cans in the freezer overnight, and they will explode. Spectacularly. Awesomely. Magnificently.

Your wife will be giggling the whole time she's helping you clean up. ;D
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Midnight Kitty

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Re: Uh.. ya, don't do that....
« Reply #2984 on: January 24, 2014, 06:53:42 PM »
Mel - I believe people should only feed animals if they pick up the poop.  I strongly object to people tossing stale bread into the canal for the fish and the ducks.  It causes them to poop more, polluting the water.  The "Pig Lady" at the ranch not only feeds the wild pigs, she gives them baths.  Yes, wild boars weighing more than 50 pounds and she treats them like domestic dogs.  Wild pigs are horrible for the environment, rooting up native plants and any other plant that is holding the soil together, making muddy wallows which breed mosquitoes and spreading pseudorabies, which may have killed my husband's therapy horse and 3 other horses on the ranch that died of vague neurological problems around the same time.

I've been known to tell people who do things like your mother that they are incredibly selfish people who just like to feel good by feeding an animal.  If you want to feel like Lady Bountiful, go ahead, but you better be picking up the poop!  Bread isn't good for the ducks.  Plus, it encourages them to breed in excess of what the environment can sustain, leading to overpopulation.  It turns wild animals who have their own dignity into beggars who no longer hunt or forage for themselves, but look to people to feed them.  Then, when someone doesn't feed them, they insist! :-X
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