Now it's time for our bad etiquette confessions

[jfulle5]

I finish people's sentences.. It's annoying, i know it but i cant help it!

[hobish]

I finish people's sentences.. It's annoying, i know it but i cant help it!

That's ok ... i will interrupt you when you are doing it. It is a terrible habit i picked up from hanging out with my ex's friends - ex actually had to instruct me to interrupt or i would never get a word in - that is just how they communicated. He was actually right, too, i was kind of quiet & really thought they just didn't like me because they would never give me a chance to speak. Once i started just "busting in" to conversation all was well.
I hadn't realized how much it carried over until a year or two ago i interrupted my manger. At a meeting. I was soooooooooo embarassed!!! ( i did apologize later )
I have gotten better, but sometimes i do still slip up.

[lolane]

I once told someone in a store to F-off. It was vulgar and rude but I don't feel too sorry about it which is bad, I know.

Basically, I was at a place where you can mail things with a little note to the troops in Iraq. I have a cousin who I'm very close to who just returned from his 2nd tour of duty (he was still there when this incident happened) so, needless to say I was a little sensitive about the situation.

So, this guy makes some comment about how it's stupid to send this stuff and how the war is dumb blah blah* So I turn around and say, "do you even know anyone who's fighting in the war?" and he says "no," and I say, "well f*&k off then."

*Please note this has nothing to do with his or my personal feelings about the war because it was irrelevant to the situation, I was really just upset because I was thinking about my cousin and how happy he was everytime he received something from home.

[Lisbeth]

Well, on the original forum I posted once about getting into a physical fight on the NYC subway with a woman who was verbally violent with me after I apologized for accidentally stepped on her feet while trying to regain my balance when the train made some jerky stops.

I also have to plead guilty to not always being as appreciative of the gifts I get from my parents as I should be.  They mean well, but sometimes my disappointment (when I'm feeling it) shows through.

And I'm not always good about responding to invitations right away, especially when I'm feeling some ambivalence about accepting them.  There have been a couple of occasions when I let them slip through my fingers and forgot about them until the day of, or after, the RSVP deadline.  Bad Keen.   

[hellgirl]

I have ongoing badness...

We got married in March. Some thank-you's are still sitting on my living room floor. Any technical hitches we had with the thank-you's don't begin to justify the lateness. To make this worse for me this is my second marriage - and the first time I didn't even do most of the thank-yous (there was an early power struggle between me and ex-dh of me going "well, I'm not gonna write them all!", which doesn't excuse the rudeness to the wonderful gift givers!) and this time I was going to be prompt and polite and all those good things - and still isn't done. And now I'm about to go away for a month and they won't make it out before I go either.  

A friend had a baby 6 months ago - he was 6 weeks early and I said I would knit him a cardigan - I even took in the book and said 'choose which pattern you'd like' - so this was a very firm offer. I almost finished it when I realised it had taken a while and he'd grown. So I went to see them and measured him. It would be too small. So I started another in a bigger size. Turns out I'm a slower knitter than I thought, because once again it would fit him now and not in a month or 2 - and it's summer here now. I gave her a gift when he was born (mommy maintainence related) and I've given him a couple of t-shirts since. But no cardigan. I'm thinking now to buy something while I'm on holiday and give him that instead. Argh!!!

These things are a constant reminder of how e-hell has a special place for me in the 'should-know-better' section.

[jfulle5]

1)I'm NEVER on time. My boss finally stopped caring.

2)I dont let people in during traffic. I think it's more likely to cause a wreck then help someone out. People around here drive like the world is ending.

[Cyndi]

I belch loudly in public and then don't excuse myself. I'm trying to shake the habit and keep it quiet, but sometimes I forget! Happens most often in choir and I cover my mouth right after so people don't smell my half-digested dinner. The men get a kick out of it though...and it doesn't help that I think burps and farts are funny and often end up giggling either.

[BurninDinner]

These make me feel so much better.  I have a zillion as I'm really clumsy and have a tendency to speak before thinking or assume others can tell what I MEANT by what I said.

1. Summer after I graduated, a friend of mine got married.  I rsvp'd no, then decided the week of the wedding I could go after all. I did email my friend who said it was fine to come.  And take my boyfriend (who had been invited) and my out of town friend staying with me that weekend.  And I didn't take a gift.  I am so sorry!  I know better now!

2. During my own wedding I had some older relatives who would send gifts that were close to my china pattern, but not.  I didn't see the point in looking at the registry then buying something like it but not what the couple's pattern is.  So at my friend's bridal shower the next winter, what I SAID was, "I don't see why people bother to look at the registry then buy something that's not on it."  GAH!

3. There were a few close friends I didn't send thank you notes to.  I thought they would just know.  Geez.

[Pixie]

I am one of the rudest people I know.   I have no manners and I came here to learn.  I will not bore you with details, they are far too painful to recall.

[hobish]

I belch loudly in public and then don't excuse myself. I'm trying to shake the habit and keep it quiet, but sometimes I forget! Happens most often in choir and I cover my mouth right after so people don't smell my half-digested dinner. The men get a kick out of it though...and it doesn't help that I think burps and farts are funny and often end up giggling either.

Dang, Cyndi, you reminded me of another one!
I do that, too. Not at work or anything, but home with friends. If my friend Jim rates them does it count as an ettiquette blunder, or does that make him just as bad as me? 
I did forget where i was one time & burped loudly at a bridal shower. I was really embarassed ...until my sister did the same thing not 2 minutes later. Poor mom was mortified. She kept telling us that was going to happen.

[LifeOnPluto]

When driving once, I accidentally cut off a cyclist. I didn't even see him - he just came zooming up behind me out of nowhere. He thumped HARD on my passenger side window as he went by and bellowed "Watch it!" before zooming ahead. (I was driving fairly slowly since it was a narrow road with cars parked on either side.

He was one of those big, young, arrogant-looking lycra-clad males. He annoyed me so much that I sped on ahead, overtook him, and gave him the finger as I did so.

I drove on for several blocks, terrified he would somehow chase me down and catch me at a stop sign, drag me from my car, and punch me and/or scream at me. I felt awful about behaving so badly too.

[Sirius]

Back when I was young I dated a young man who was actually one of the better ones I dated (I had a terrible record before Mr. Sirius.) The trouble was, he was the only son of a widowed mother, and when she saw that we might be getting serious all of a sudden she went from being very nice to me to being a complete witch.  

It all came to a head the night D graduated from high school.  He invited me, and I went to the graduation.  D's mom made snarky comments all evening, took us to dinner and made snarky comments, and then as she dropped me off told me I was no longer welcome in her home.

I had no idea what had happened.  I found out later that she was upset that I had come to D's graduation.  He had invited me, so I didn't feel that I was there uninvited, but maybe he hadn't cleared it with his mom, but that should have been between them.  At D's request I apologized to her for intruding, and got lambasted.  According to her I was trying to come between her and her only son, which she felt was terribly unfair because "you have a family with brothers and sisters, and all I've got is him!"  I was too young to read between the lines, but in retrospect she'd have been the MIL from Hell if we'd gotten married.  So I told her I would never see her son again, and hung up in her ear.  

When I told D I had promised his mother I'd never see him again, he wasn't surprised, because apparently this was a pattern of hers:  He'd start dating someone, then she'd find some real or perceived slight and blow it all out of proportion, and guilt the girl into breaking up with her son.  

I know now that I should have checked with D's mom before going to his graduation, but then again I thought D had cleared it with her.  On the other hand, I'm not so sure that he didn't do it on purpose, in view of some of the things I subsequently learned.

[mumma to KMC]

I know now that I should have checked with D's mom before going to his graduation, but then again I thought D had cleared it with her.  On the other hand, I'm not so sure that he didn't do it on purpose, in view of some of the things I subsequently learned.

I don't think that you should have been the one responsible for finding out if he cleared it with her. I mean, he was an adult and it was his graduation.

As for her being the MIL from you know where, sounds like it. Have you ever heard from him since then?

[Balletmom]

Ahh, confession is good for the soul!

I accidentally walked in on someone (actually, two teenage or slightly older girls) in the dressing room today. I looked under, thought the feet were in the NEXT stall--and the door was a little ajar.

AGGGH! I was so embarrassed, I blurted out, "EXCUSE me! The door was open!" and then I shut the door so fast I shut part of the clothing I wanted to try on, in the door! I couldn't get it out--but I didn't want to open the door again--so I kept pulling--

I was so embarrassed and felt so badly I left my car keys in MY dressing room, and had to come back and ask for them a half hour later.

But I did get a great denim skirt on clearance.

Of my many other blunders, we had friends over to dinner 20 years ago, they brought a bottle of wine, and I didn't serve it. And I should have, because I don't think the dinner was very good. The girl friend stayed mad for several months, though, when she easily could have said, "hey, get the corkscrew, silly!" But I WAS an idiot hostess.

She did get even, several months later when she married the guy, she asked me at the last minute to fill in for her house party for a no-show friend. I even loaned her my grandmother's opal ring to wear as something borrowed--it looked so pretty with her dress.

She didn't return it for several weeks later, and then their house was robbed--including my ring.

They asked if it was an heirloom, and I said, well, not exactly...it wasn't an antique setting.

They said, "Okay!" and made no offer to replace it or anything like that.

[Chocolate Cake]

Ya know....you aren't obligated to serve the wine that your guests bring.  Honest.  All the etiquette books say so.  You're off the hook! 

Regarding the opal ring, however, bad bad friend.   I bet they even filed an insurance claim on it and kept the money.