I recently joined a newly formed book club. Many of the women in this club have said they joined club in the past where turn-out was low and the clubs fell apart b/c of lack of participation (I've had this experience myself). So the founder, who is nice but rather controlling, instituted (with a majority vote) and "Do not RSVP then not show up w/ no notice and you are out of the club" rule.
It is understood that each of us will have occasional conflicts that keep us from our monthly meetings, so we must notify the founder and that month's host if we are unable to attend in advance....a few days preferred, but it's an emergency same day notice is fine. But notice must be given b/c whomever is hosting prepares a meal and goes to a lot of effort to host the club that month at her house.
So I hosted the club this past weekened and spent about $200 on food and drinks for the 11 members who has RSVPed...10 showed up. A brand member who just joined and had not attended any previous meetings had RSVPed she would attend but did not show and did not give notice to myself or the founder of the club.
After we finished eating and talking about the book the founder recommended we kick the new member out. I suggested that b/c she hadn't been to a meeting before we might cut her some slack this one time b/c she might not have known about our "no show with no notice and you're out" rule. The founder disagrees and feels strongly we should enforce this rule w/o exception. Yeh, I didn't appreciate the no show as the hostess, but I'm flexible and willing to give this new member I haven't met a break this one time.
I think the club founder being a little too controlling...her most noted characteristic, but I still like her b/c she's sharp and funny and contributes a lot to the group.
What do you think? Should the new person be booted out or be given a polite, but firm, indication that RSVPing to attend and then not coming with no notice is not acceptable in our club and another incident she will be asked to leave the club.
I went from a book club that fell apart b/c no one particpated to one I enjoy but feel is a bit dictatorial about attendance. A happy medium would be nice.