I've just stopped pounding my head on the desk after this little exchange. Couldn't decide whether to put it here or the conversations that drive you crazy thread...then figured that this patron is a major snowflake (she's the one that wanted me to zip up her coat) so here she is again.
She trotted over and showed me some new electrical gadget (looked like a phone, but not really) and said "Do you have a card for this that's maybe lying around in lost and found and you can give it to me so I can use this?"
And I said "If we had a card for that in lost and found, it would mean someone else lost it and it belonged to THEM."
Snowflake stares at me.
"But see, it NEEDS a card."
"And we don't have any of those."
"But I could buy one."
"Yes, but we don't carry them. Library, not computer store."
She contemplates this a while, then says "How many days until February 2nd?"
I give her the number of days until Saturday, February 2. (9).
She continues "Oh, that's such a long time. This month has been so long. Why is it taking this month so long to go by? Is the month usually this long? Does it take a month this long to go by?"
"Well," I said "when you are waiting for something, it can make the month seem a lot longer than it is. "
Finally she wandered off and my coworker said "Kind of like that conversation probably seemed to take a lot longer than the five minutes it was."