Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 5746123 times)

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Tea Drinker

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19335 on: February 03, 2013, 10:45:48 AM »
Neither am I happy when a musician belts out "Everybody, JOIN IN THE CHORUS, come on you can sing louder!" - Pal, I paid good money to  sit right here and watch YOU sing.

Getting the audience to join in is a skill, and it doesn't consist of yelling at them. Doing it right can range from gesturing to indicate that singing along would be welcome, to Pete Seeger's style of encouragement and teaching the lyrics. But if the musician is good at it, s/he isn't yelling at you, because s/he doesn't have to, and because s/he realizes that not everyone wants to sing.

Done right, it also doesn't feel like the musician is being lazy: it was clearly more work for Pete to teach the audience a chorus or two than it would have been for him to just sing it. But equally clearly, he liked that work just as he liked the work of singing and playing an instrument. (I went to a concert by a different folk musician a few years ago, and I liked it, but it was also clear that this guy had wanted to be Pete Seeger when he grew up, and wasn't, and not just because Pete Seeger was still being Pete Seeger.)
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doodlemor

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19336 on: February 03, 2013, 12:11:42 PM »
Poor woman, I think I'd be in tears as well.

I would be too, but they'd be tears of frustration and anger.

I am curious though as to how he got her keys (and her car) in the first place if he was her brother.  And I would also like to know in what universe his brain lives in where it is his sister's responsibility to either drive him around or provide him with her car?  ???

I suspect that brother was the **special** golden child in his family, and that sister has spent her whole life in his service.

snowdragon

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19337 on: February 03, 2013, 12:36:51 PM »
I love the people who joined in and danced with the singers. :)
I once attended a performance of CATS where, when the Rum Tum Tugger came down off the stage to dance with someone in the audience, the woman would. not. dance. She wouldn't even stand up. I told someone about it and she cried out, 'No! You've gotta dance with the Rum Tum Tugger!'
That became a sort of motto for us, how you need to seize the moment and the experience, rather than worrying about whether you'll look foolish, or whatever else you were doing.

Good positive advice, BUT if it happened to me I'd react the same way as that lady. I can't feel "free and easy" when suddenly (and by surprise) all eyes are on me. Neither am I happy when a musician belts out "Everybody, JOIN IN THE CHORUS, come on you can sing louder!" - Pal, I paid good money to  sit right here and watch YOU sing.

On the CATS thing - even if I wanted to,  I could not and If I got yanked out of my seat it would put me in a LOT of pain. I'd be unamused at best and no I don't think not dancing is SS , even with  RumTum Tiger.
  On the Singing thing, it's expected at certain concerts that you will sing, particularly folk type concerts....it's part of the culture of genre. As mentioned Pete Seeger does this and several others I know - as away of teaching the songs to the next generation of listeners, so they may in turn teach it as so on. Others do it because the fans expect it or even as away of gaining crowd "control".  Also no matter what the genre, I know of no musician who does it to be lazy, their might be that one, but I've never met them, preforming is hard work - getting people to connect enough to  join in even harder.

snowdragon

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19338 on: February 03, 2013, 12:41:58 PM »
Poor woman, I think I'd be in tears as well.

I would be too, but they'd be tears of frustration and anger.

I am curious though as to how he got her keys (and her car) in the first place if he was her brother.  And I would also like to know in what universe his brain lives in where it is his sister's responsibility to either drive him around or provide him with her car?  ???

  He could be visiting or even live with her and have taken them out of her purse or he could simply live close enough to go to her home and take them. My brother is the golden child who thinks everyone is responsible for and to him.,,,at 40 something mom still backs this up. If he is in I sleep with my keys tied to my wrist because Golden Child is not above taking them and using my car. 

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19339 on: February 03, 2013, 01:19:31 PM »
I would not be in tears, OR in a pizza joint with my brother, as he would be in jail.

Oh, that story ticks me off!

I do feel bad for the sister, and I'm sure she was frustrated and angry as well.  I know there are times when I get so angry that I do cry so it's possible they were tears of anger.

But I feel bad for her mostly because I get the impression that her brother's always been a SS that she was expected to cater to, based on his attitude.  And if he was catered too, possibly the tears of frustration and fury were because she knows that if she turned him in she'd hear hell from their mother. 

Or maybe it's all the ehell SS stories. *chuckle*
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Jocelyn

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19340 on: February 03, 2013, 02:15:20 PM »
I love the people who joined in and danced with the singers. :)
I once attended a performance of CATS where, when the Rum Tum Tugger came down off the stage to dance with someone in the audience, the woman would. not. dance. She wouldn't even stand up. I told someone about it and she cried out, 'No! You've gotta dance with the Rum Tum Tugger!'
That became a sort of motto for us, how you need to seize the moment and the experience, rather than worrying about whether you'll look foolish, or whatever else you were doing.

Good positive advice, BUT if it happened to me I'd react the same way as that lady. I can't feel "free and easy" when suddenly (and by surprise) all eyes are on me. Neither am I happy when a musician belts out "Everybody, JOIN IN THE CHORUS, come on you can sing louder!" - Pal, I paid good money to  sit right here and watch YOU sing.

I've never seen Cat's live and didn't know they do that.  I would be like that lady too.  I don't think that makes people like us SS.  The actor should have moved on.

Just a word, then...do not purchase tickets on the front row. :) Every production I've seen, the RTT comes down from the left side of the stage (as you're sitting in the audience), so you especially don't want those seats. I'd gotten tickets about 2 rows back, because I wanted to be close up to the action. You also don't want aisle seats, as some of the cats come up the aisle to the stage, rather than entering from backstage, if you don't want to be caught in the spotlights.

Jocelyn

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19341 on: February 03, 2013, 02:28:08 PM »

Yup. and while being willing to try new experiences and not be too worried about whether you'll look foolish is fine, I don't think that trying to force someone to 'go with the flow' is appropriate. In the 'Cats' scenario, if the actor was trying to get the woman to dance for long enough that it became really noticeable to the audience as a whole that she was resisting, then I think he was pushing too hard - he should have quickly moved on to someone else rather than put her in an unwelcome spotlight once she had made it clear she didn't want to dance.

In his defense...he's coming off a lit stage into a dark house, and there's only so many measures of music for him to come down and dance before he has to be back up on stage. So he can't move around too much; he's pretty much limited to the front row of the left section of seats. The RTT is the Elvis of the cat world, all the girlcats are crazy about him. It was unfortunate that the front row at this show had only ONE woman sitting in it, or otherwise I'm sure he would have stepped a seat or two down to the next lady. It wasn't as if he stood there a long time, demanding she dance; it was that I was in row three right behind her, that it was obvious to me. And I agree, the box office should   put up a warning that part of the action of a show takes place in the space between the front row and the stage, and in the aisles, so that people who don't want to be that close to the action can choose other seats.

magician5

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19342 on: February 03, 2013, 04:26:52 PM »
Also no matter what the genre, I know of no musician who does it to be lazy

I didn't really mean that enlisting the audience to sing along is lazy (I was just being snarky, sorry) ... but "old-line folkies" tend to be political, and I don't want to be browbeaten into joining one side of a political demonstration. I know, nobody would jump on me if I simply remained silent among the crowd, but it's still uncomfortable. Also, I sing badly enough to be mistaken for a wounded animal. I also know that if I didn't want to be in that position, maybe I shouldn't go to that particular singer's concert ... a bit like realizing that you're in the front row of a Gallagher comedy show and the smashed watermelon will be drenching you in just a second.
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weeblewobble

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19343 on: February 03, 2013, 05:24:56 PM »
Poor woman, I think I'd be in tears as well.

I would be too, but they'd be tears of frustration and anger.

I am curious though as to how he got her keys (and her car) in the first place if he was her brother.  And I would also like to know in what universe his brain lives in where it is his sister's responsibility to either drive him around or provide him with her car?  ???

After the Christmas travel debacle involving my irresponsible snowflake brother, I've resolved to change the way I interact with him. Because I don't want to end up in the kind of position above.  So where as I would normally just go with the flow or just stew silently about his self-centered antics, I am calling him on it and frequently.  For instance, earlier this month, brother came into town on a quick overnight trip and asked if he could stay at my home. I told him that was fine, but he would have to sleep in the second twin bed in my son's room since we don't have a guest room. DS is 4.  Bro said that was fine.

During the course of his 24 hour visit, he griped almost non-stop:

- about having to sleep in a "crappy twin bed."
- about my kids being too loud.  They weren't, they were operating at normal conversational levels.  But they were talking during a sports program he wanted to watch and he expected complete silence.
- about not being able to take a four hour nap in my son's room during the day because my son kept coming in to get toys or books to play with in the living room.  Sorry, it's my son's room and if he wants a toy, he can get it.
- about my kids getting up too early in the morning (to get dressed for their school day) and waking him up before he was ready.

So when he left, I pulled him aside and quietly informed him that hotels have nicer beds, TVs he can control and kid-free rooms.  So the next time he comes into town, he should book a room in one, because he is not going to spend his time in my home criticizing my hospitality and making my kids feel uncomfortable in their own homes.  I'm done.
« Last Edit: February 03, 2013, 05:26:38 PM by weeblewobble »

Morticia

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19344 on: February 03, 2013, 05:33:37 PM »
Good for you.
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gramma dishes

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19345 on: February 03, 2013, 05:43:01 PM »
...   So when he left, I pulled him aside and quietly informed him that hotels have nicer beds, TVs he can control and kid-free rooms.  So the next time he comes into town, he should book a room in one, because he is not going to spend his time in my home criticizing my hospitality and making my kids feel uncomfortable in their own homes.  I'm done.

Yay, Weeblewobble!  Well done!   :)

ladyknight1

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19346 on: February 03, 2013, 05:57:05 PM »
My mother is perpetually either a) watching what she eats or b) espousing the doctrine of "Just thirty minutes of exercise a dayyyyy" which I have posted about before. Her latest tactic is letting everyone know that she's watching what she eats. I can't tell if that's for her benefit or if she's trying to be PA about it like she was when she repeatedly mentioned 30 minutes of exercise a day.

Well, my father and I were talking about where we wanted to go for dinner or if we wanted to cook. We'd eaten lunch at an Italian place and had all had pasta with some sort of cream sauce. Dad brought up the idea of eating Chinese, and my mother clutched at her stomach and said "No, not tonight, I just had pasta for lunch and that would be too rich for me to eat something like that twice in one day." To which Dad and I shrugged and started talking about somewhere else. My mother, unsolicited, interrupted with "I just have to eat something cleaner if I eat pasta for lunch, I may eat a piece of fish and some vegetables." To which my father suggested another restaurant and my mother said "Oh no, I couldn't go out twice in one day, they put so many sauces and preservatives and calories in things now" and which point my father said that was fine, we could stay home. He asked her if she wanted the leftovers in the fridge, at which point she heaved a martyred sigh and replied that no, those were far too rich for her tastes and she just wanted to eat cleanly for the rest of the evening, because she didn't usually splurge like she did at lunch. It was just so unusual for her to eat unhealthily like that but she did it every now and again, etc. etc. When Dad and I finished the leftovers she cooked her food and while we were eating turned to me and said "This is what I like to eat after I eat something rich and fatty for lunch, it's really good for you."  I swear it never ends with her.

Your mother and my sister could be the same person.

When my sister and her poor long-suffering DH got together, and then were married, the poor man never got to pick what he wanted to eat or where to go. Dsis has a very specialized diet of choice, and is very particular on where and what she eats. Even at a restaurant, he had to share a meal with her, as she just didn't have a large appetite.  ::) Finally, my BIL put his foot down and told DSis that he would order what he wanted, and she could do the same. Dsis has finally come closer to a normal relationship with food and is tolerable to be around during mealtimes.  :D

weeblewobble

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19347 on: February 03, 2013, 09:10:34 PM »
Someone asked what my brother's response to my telling him, "No more free lodging."

His response was:
"I was only kidding!"
"Why are you being so sensitive?"
"Why are you taking it that way?"

Seriously, he said everything but, "I'm calling MOM!"

I am past the point of caring anymore.  I really don't want my kids to get the impression that it's OK for family to treat you badly just because they happen to share DNA with you.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19348 on: February 03, 2013, 09:25:02 PM »
This is a nasty SS: When the lights went out in the stadium, my radio station jokingly posted that they should put Beyonce back on because "she can turn on anything."

The nasty part? Someone replied " She couldnt even have a baby. They closed down the entire maternity ward so her surrogate could. In case some people don't know that little nugget."  >:(  >:(
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

mmswm

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19349 on: February 03, 2013, 09:28:56 PM »
This is a nasty SS: When the lights went out in the stadium, my radio station jokingly posted that they should put Beyonce back on because "she can turn on anything."

The nasty part? Someone replied " She couldnt even have a baby. They closed down the entire maternity ward so her surrogate could. In case some people don't know that little nugget."  >:(  >:(

Oh, dear heavens!  Now disregarding my personal opinions of the whole maternity ward thing (lets just say I will never, ever, ever spend even one penny on anything that either of them are connected to), but that comment was so far out of line the poster needs a grappling hook and several lengths of rope to find it again.
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