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Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 6551084 times)

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snowfire

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19995 on: March 12, 2013, 08:00:35 PM »
Son-in-law #1 has a hilarious story about witnessing the downfall of a local SS gangbanger who thought that not only was the world his trash can, but that his fecal matter had no odor.   SS tosses an empty paper cup into the air and lets it fall the ground, 10 feet from a trash can, thus attracting the attention of a passing cop in a police cruiser.  Cop tells SS twice to PICK UP THE CUP AND PUT IT IN THE TRASH.  SS ignores cop. PICK UP THE CUP AND PUT IT IN THE TRASH OR YOU WILL BE CHARGED WITH LITTERING.  SS then gives cop the finger.  Cop barrels out of the cruiser, wrestles cuffs on SS, stuffs him into the cruiser, and away they go.  And undoubtedly he was charged with a whole list of things other than plain littering.
Bwaahhhaaaahaaaaa. >:D  Messing with the karma fairy can be painful!  I'll bet when they ran his prints they had a whole long list of charges so slap him with. "Felony Stupid in Public" for starters.

Hazmat

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19996 on: March 12, 2013, 08:01:43 PM »
Paraphrasing Stephen Wright:
One time my friend George & I went on a 5 day cross-country trip with only one tape to listen to.  I forget what it was.
A guest is a jewel on the cushion of hospitality. -Nero Wolfe

Indiana

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19997 on: March 12, 2013, 08:05:10 PM »
I think I've told this story here before:  my brother used to have the authority to write littering tickets under environmental legislation.  He was paddling one night at the local rapid and there was a man with his young son, fishing.  They left a pop can behind.  They were still in the parking lot when my brother was coming in.  He identified himself and asked the man to go back and get the can.  His son was all for it but couldn't go on his own.  The man refused.  So my brother wrote him a ticket, based on his driver's license.

When he spoke to his boss, boss was all for going ahead with the ticket.  Turns out, the man had moved about 6 months before and had neglected to update his driver's license with his new address.  So for refusing to go back and pick up a pop can, he ended up with several hundred dollars in fines, on top of the littering fine.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
Ontario

Library Dragon

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19998 on: March 12, 2013, 08:49:55 PM »
I only got to enjoy this as an eye witness, but it's a favorite story. 

In grad school I was outside chatting with one of my education profs.  As at many campuses the traffic creeps along.  The prof recognized one of his undergrad students and tried to wave, but she didn't see him.  She the lowers her window and non-challantly drops a large fast food bag out the window.  The window goes up.  The car pulls up a few feet.

The prof goes and picks up the bag, walks over to the car, and knocks on the window.  The window comes down. "Hi SS you accidentally dropped this." He hands her the bag and walks back to me. 

He was simultaneously angry and delighted pondering if she would say anything the next day in class.  As far as I know she never did.  He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

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NyaChan

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #19999 on: March 12, 2013, 09:24:29 PM »
I only got to enjoy this as an eye witness, but it's a favorite story. 

In grad school I was outside chatting with one of my education profs.  As at many campuses the traffic creeps along.  The prof recognized one of his undergrad students and tried to wave, but she didn't see him.  She the lowers her window and non-challantly drops a large fast food bag out the window.  The window goes up.  The car pulls up a few feet.

The prof goes and picks up the bag, walks over to the car, and knocks on the window.  The window comes down. "Hi SS you accidentally dropped this." He hands her the bag and walks back to me. 

He was simultaneously angry and delighted pondering if she would say anything the next day in class.  As far as I know she never did.  He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

It hurts.  It actually hurts!

Elfmama

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20000 on: March 12, 2013, 10:05:10 PM »
I only got to enjoy this as an eye witness, but it's a favorite story. 

In grad school I was outside chatting with one of my education profs.  As at many campuses the traffic creeps along.  The prof recognized one of his undergrad students and tried to wave, but she didn't see him.  She the lowers her window and non-challantly drops a large fast food bag out the window.  The window goes up.  The car pulls up a few feet.

The prof goes and picks up the bag, walks over to the car, and knocks on the window.  The window comes down. "Hi SS you accidentally dropped this." He hands her the bag and walks back to me. 

He was simultaneously angry and delighted pondering if she would say anything the next day in class.  As far as I know she never did.  He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

It hurts.  It actually hurts!
That's the kind of stupid you get when everything before one's own birthdate is all lumped together as "The Olden Days" or "A Long, Long Time Ago." 
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Library Dragon

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20001 on: March 12, 2013, 11:34:22 PM »
I was frightened that she was an education major.   :-\

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eltf177

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20002 on: March 13, 2013, 05:46:49 AM »
You _had_ to bring up long trips with one tape. Imagine this:

California to Virginia, Summer 1976. Hot, car's A/C doesn't work well and thus isn't used. Four people and lots of stuff crammed into a fairly small space. 8 Track with 2 tapes: a homemade tape of The Four Aces and Tony Orlando and Dawn's Greatest Hits. Mom hates the first and loves the second, so coast-to-coast nothing but TIE A YELLOW RIBBON and other songs.

To this day, if I hear Tony Orlando and Dawn I get motion sick even sitting still...

LadyJaneinMD

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20003 on: March 13, 2013, 06:38:25 AM »
I once took a road trip with a friend, from New York State to Georgia.   With the Statler Brothers in the tape player the whole way there, and back. 

I used to like the Statler Brothers.  *sigh* 

o_gal

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20004 on: March 13, 2013, 07:08:43 AM »
He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

It hurts.  It actually hurts!
That's the kind of stupid you get when everything before one's own birthdate is all lumped together as "The Olden Days" or "A Long, Long Time Ago."

No, stupid would be if she didn't ask, and just went on assuming that maybe it was after WW2. She asked because she didn't know, and now she does. It is kind of brain hurty she got through elementary/middle/high school without knowing something that she really should have learned. But if we're going to call adults "stupid" for asking questions that we assume that they should already know, then it's going to make it tough for anyone to want to ask questions for fear of being labelled "stupid". </soapbox>

MariaE

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20005 on: March 13, 2013, 08:14:38 AM »
He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

It hurts.  It actually hurts!
That's the kind of stupid you get when everything before one's own birthdate is all lumped together as "The Olden Days" or "A Long, Long Time Ago."

No, stupid would be if she didn't ask, and just went on assuming that maybe it was after WW2. She asked because she didn't know, and now she does. It is kind of brain hurty she got through elementary/middle/high school without knowing something that she really should have learned. But if we're going to call adults "stupid" for asking questions that we assume that they should already know, then it's going to make it tough for anyone to want to ask questions for fear of being labelled "stupid". </soapbox>

*Applause*
 
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LadyClaire

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20006 on: March 13, 2013, 08:18:33 AM »
The people who live one street over from us have a boxer. They do not have a fenced yard and will usually walk the dog when he has to go. Except sometimes they don't feel like walking him, and will just open their back door and let him run loose in the subdivision. The dog isn't aggressive, but he barks loudly at everything (and sometimes at nothing at all) and will go into people's yards to do his business or to bother their dogs.

Well, they let him out at 1:00 A.M. last night, and at 3:00 A.M. he was still outside, running loose, standing in driveways and barking his head off. He woke up just about everyone on our street, including me. A few people tried to catch him to take him back home, but no one could grab him. Our next door neighbor called the police, who hopefully had a word with the owners. Fingers crossed that this puts an end to them just letting the dog run loose when they don't want to walk him. If not, I'm going to have to start calling animal control every time the dog is out, because it's unfair to everyone else in the subdivision.

Margo

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20007 on: March 13, 2013, 08:41:25 AM »
No to mention being unfair to the dog, which may get injured or lost.

LadyClaire

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20008 on: March 13, 2013, 09:30:03 AM »
No to mention being unfair to the dog, which may get injured or lost.

Yeah. Our subdivision is also in a fairly rural, small-town type area surrounded by farmers. The mindset of a lot of people is that a nuisance dog is a dog who needs to disappear before it hurts someone's livestock, and since animal control is one guy in a pickup truck who doesn't respond half the time you call, people often take matters into their own hands. I'd never let a dog run free out here (not that I'd let a dog run free anywhere but my own yard) for fear that someone would shoot it or poison it.

It even used to be that if you called the police about a problem dog, their answer was "if it comes into your yard, just shoot it", but they've at least started responding to complaints by coming out and having a word with the home owners instead of advising people to shoot the dog.

norrina

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20009 on: March 13, 2013, 12:00:29 PM »
He did share that she once asked him if the Revolutionary War was before or after WW2.

It hurts.  It actually hurts!
That's the kind of stupid you get when everything before one's own birthdate is all lumped together as "The Olden Days" or "A Long, Long Time Ago."

No, stupid would be if she didn't ask, and just went on assuming that maybe it was after WW2. She asked because she didn't know, and now she does. It is kind of brain hurty she got through elementary/middle/high school without knowing something that she really should have learned. But if we're going to call adults "stupid" for asking questions that we assume that they should already know, then it's going to make it tough for anyone to want to ask questions for fear of being labelled "stupid". </soapbox>

Thank you o_gal. I struggle with history/dates, and always have. My first day of classes in undergrad, upon arrival to my general studies world history class I found the blackboard covered with various historical figures and occurrences. When class began, the professor announced that he would be going around the room, and when it was your turn you were to choose a person or event that had not yet been chosen, and share with the class what you knew about it. I was sitting at the opposite end of the room from where he began, and as each person before me chose yet another "easy" topic, I became progressively more and more anxious, knowing that my ignorance was going to be exposed.

In high school, I became exceedingly interested in the holocaust and researched it heavily. I couldn't tell you *when* it actually occurred though. In college I wrote a compare/contrast paper on the Israeli Palestinian Conflict and apartheid, but I couldn't say the relevant dates for these events either. In law school I had to take my school's required class on the context of how the constitution was framed twice, after which I can at least almost identify the important years in our country's governmental framework.

I graduated from fairly highly regarded schools, and passed my state's bar exam on the first try, I consider myself at least reasonably intelligent, but nothing makes me feel really stupid faster than having any sort of historical date discussion come up in my presence.