(Slightly long) I just remembered this one.
Amusing Holiday version of a Magnus Sono Cena Special Snowflake. (Large Celebrate Meal)*
Picture this New Year’s Eve around suppertime. DH decided that he was hungry for seafood and wanted to go to “Nice Seafood Restaurant (NSR)”. I tried to explain that it was New Year’s Eve and that everyone and their dog would be out, but he insisted. So we drove to NSR and asked how long the wait would be without a reservation. For two people, it would be about 45 minutes to an hour at that point. Groovy. We sat down in the waiting area since the bar was full. Our bench was pretty close to the hostess stand.
Enter Magnus Sono Cena SS #1. He is, apparently, the scout for his group. He comes to the hostess stand and asks about a reservation for his group of 10. Yes, she did have his name in, but the reservation wasn’t until 6:30 and it was only 6:15.
Magnus SS - This was an OUTRAGE, his family HAD A RESERVATION!
Calm Hostess - Yes, you have a reservation for 6:30 and we will seat you as close to that time as possible.
Magnus SS – No this was unacceptable. They needed seated now. They had family members who were diabetic and needed to eat in a timely manner.
Calm Hostess – But the reservation was for 6:30 and while we are running a little behind…
Magnus SS – An OUTRAGE! Blahg bharg
Calm Hostess (interrupting slightly) – As I said with the crowds we are running a few minutes behind and will have you seated as soon as your table is ready. Is your party here?
Magnus SS – No Actually, I am the only one. I was going to wait at the table to hold it for us. (Er…dude what did you think a reservation was for?)
Calm Hostess – We will call your name when your table is ready. It probably will be about 10-15 minutes.
Added bonus, the table was ready about 6:35. When this group was sat, three people from the group came in 10 minutes later than the rest of the group.
As we sat waiting for our name to be called, I could hear the hostess tell walk-ins the wait time. Which was getting longer. So by 45 minutes into our wait, it was almost 1 ½ hour wait for those walking in.
And then comes Mr. Big Shot along with his “date”. Not to cast aspersions or make huge assumptions but everything about this couple shouted Mid-Life Crisis Sugar Daddytm
and Gold Digger Bimbotm
Mr Big Shot to the hostess – I want a booth. We need to be seated now. (Fun fact, this restaurant has limited number of booths, a good 3/4 of the main dining area are tables. Booths are a premium on slow days.)
Calm Hostess – And do you have a reservation?
Mr. Big Shot – Whaaaat? No of course not. You will seat us – in a booth – now. You can see EVERYONE in the waiting area just waiting for the hostess to lower the boom on him.
Calm Hostess – Well, sir. As you can plainly see, there are several people before you and the dining room is to capacity. I can certainly put you on the list. There is a 2 hour wait at this time. (Please note that just before Big Shot walked in she had just told someone that would be a little under 1 1/2 hour wait.)
Mr. Big Shot – Whaaat? 2 hours? But I want seated now in a booth. (Yeah we all caught that)
Calm Hostess – Yes, well for a booth is probably will be longer than 2 hours, but I am not sure.
And then she just quietly looked at him politely, as if waiting for him to give his name.
He sputtered a bit and grabbed his date’s arm and hustled her and her heels (very impressive on her part since she was in 5-inch heels) down the steps and out the take out door.
While we couldn’t exactly cheer the hostess. There was a quiet murmur of impressed guests. The next person who walked in (about 5 minutes after Big Shot left) was told without a reservation it would be about 1 ½ hours.
Way to be looking out for her waitstaff and the rest of the customers who would have had to listen to Big Shot. Because you just know that he would have been an absolute dream to wait on.
We were seated before our hour mark hit.
*Yes, I actually tried to look up Latin words for this.