On the subject of close parkers, I was once at my local library and came out to find that someone had parked so close to my drivers' side that Plastic Man would have had a hard time squeezing through the gap. I went back into the library and asked the librarian to page the driver of the [green Subaru, license number XXX 000].
When the driver came, she was NOT HAPPY with me. She yelled and moaned the entire way out that she hadn't parked too close, and that I was being unreasonable, and that I'd better not tell people she parked too close, and couldn't I just squeeze in the passenger side, and anyway it was my fault for being too fat.
(I am overweight. That wasn't relevant since, like I said, no living human could have fit into that gap.)
She pulled the car out enough so I could get in, carefully parked it again the same distance away form my car, and went back into the library, cussing me out the entire time for taking her out of the library and talking trash about her driving skills.
I just drove away.