What was Special Snowflakey about my cousin (once removed) was not that she declined to provide information, but that she demanded I air her grievances in my family tree -- a totally ridiculous, inappropriate, and very special request. Also, instead of declining politely, she dumped her hot mess of personal issues on me.
To clear up a few misconceptions, ancestry.com is very strict with information about living people. No one can see the information -- not even the name -- unless they created a record in their own tree or they give someone permission to share their tree. Ancestry.com does not add to or change the information you've entered. You can review "hints" and decide whether or not to add them. Yes, there's a lot of misinformation -- welcome to genealogy.