### Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 5519484 times)

8 Members and 10 Guests are viewing this topic.

#### wolfie

• I don't know what this is so I am putting random words here
• Super Hero!
• Posts: 7083
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27945 on: July 15, 2014, 09:01:52 AM »
I’ve recently started building my family tree on ancestry.com and have contacted some long-lost relatives to ask for names and dates.  I contacted my cousin’s 40-year-old daughter, whom I’ve never met (I haven’t heard from her father in decades).

She answered “Are you aware that my father abandoned me and my brother after my parents were divorced [when she was a child]?  We don’t exist to him.”

I replied that I wasn’t aware the situation was so bad, but I’d be grateful to have full names and birth dates for her, her brother, and her mother.

Her response was that she didn’t want to be part of my family tree unless I added information about what a jerk her father is and all the ways he’s done her wrong.

Seriously . . . it’s genealogy, not therapy. There's no place in my family tree for personal issues.  I decided not to engage the crazy, but I thought about telling her I’d replace her leaf on the tree with a box that says “Crazy Person”.

Oddly, she's Facebook friends with several relatives on her father’s side and often gushes over their posts.

I’ve recently started building my family tree on ancestry.com and have contacted some long-lost relatives to ask for names and dates.  I contacted my cousin’s 40-year-old daughter, whom I’ve never met (I haven’t heard from her father in decades).

She answered “Are you aware that my father abandoned me and my brother after my parents were divorced [when she was a child]?  We don’t exist to him.”

I replied that I wasn’t aware the situation was so bad, but I’d be grateful to have full names and birth dates for her, her brother, and her mother.

Her response was that she didn’t want to be part of my family tree unless I added information about what a jerk her father is and all the ways he’s done her wrong.

Seriously . . . it’s genealogy, not therapy. There's no place in my family tree for personal issues.  I decided not to engage the crazy, but I thought about telling her I’d replace her leaf on the tree with a box that says “Crazy Person”.

Oddly, she's Facebook friends with several relatives on her father’s side and often gushes over their posts.

The good thing about ancestry is that eventually the will find that "leaf" and add it to your family tree for you.  So any information that she has put in her profile can be copied over to your tree.  So I would put the father name if you know it, as well as her name if you know it.  The system will do the rest

So even if I have absolutely no account or anything to do with ancestry eventually I will be added to family trees?

• Super Hero!
• Posts: 7750
• Operating the logic hammer since 1987.
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27946 on: July 15, 2014, 09:36:14 AM »
I am seconding the request to move on from the geneology topic before the thread is locked.

SS makeup drivers yesterday and today. I honestly don't understand that vanity supersedes safety.

#### kherbert05

• Super Hero!
• Posts: 10400
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27947 on: July 15, 2014, 10:16:48 AM »
I went to the grocery store yesterday. I picked up a loose grocery cart from the parking lot and went in. As I entered their were 2 women waiting in the cart storage area for some carts to be brought in. They were both dressed in a non-western style. One woman was older. For some reason she seemed to think she should get my cart. The younger woman quickly stepped in, stopped her from pulling on my cart, and redirected her back to the storage area. The younger woman mouth sorry over the older woman's shoulder. I smiled and mouth it's ok.  It could have been cultural differences, it could have been the woman had some type of dementia, or was just entitled. Doesn't matter, it was handled politely.

So I have no idea why the man who followed me into the store, thought it was appropriate to start complaining to me about the two woman in horrible racist terms.

I gave him the look and quietly said, "I have no idea who you are but keep your racist comments to yourself and leave me alone,"

I'm guessing I looked pretty angry, because one of the managers intercepted me and asked if there was a problem. I told her he had made a racist remarks about the women waiting for a cart just because of a small miscommunication.

The manager nodded and said, "Thought it might be something like that." She smiled and walked off towards the man. I noticed that if I saw him - I saw her close behind while I shopped.

So I guess he has caused problems before.
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future

#### Shalamar

• Hero Member
• Posts: 1232
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27948 on: July 15, 2014, 12:33:41 PM »
Speaking of grocery stores, the one that my husband and I patronized back in the day had a large bin set up in the front for donations to a soup kitchen.  (Still does, actually.)  My husband and I were on fairly good terms with the store's manager - until the day that Manager saw us buy some canned food and put it in the bin.  He started railing at us about how people who use soup kitchens are "freeloaders", and people like us were only "encouraging them to be lazy".

We still go to that store, but the manager is long gone.   I wonder if he mouthed off at the wrong person.

#### Redneck Gravy

• Hero Member
• Posts: 2724
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27949 on: July 15, 2014, 12:51:55 PM »
The good thing about ancestry is that eventually the will find that "leaf" and add it to your family tree for you.  So any information that she has put in her profile can be copied over to your tree.  So I would put the father name if you know it, as well as her name if you know it.  The system will do the rest

oops I didn't see that we had moved on - Sorry !
So even if this person chooses not to share information with CDL, Ancestry will eventually provide CDL with information from the person's family tree?  That seems rather shady from a privacy perspective.

Not only that, it also doesn't take into account the number of people who carefully curate their genealogy research versus the people who leap at wild guesses.  ("Her name was Sarah Miller and I found a record of a Sarah Miller living in the same town, so it must be her!" versus "There's a possibility these are the same people but we have no birth/death dates for this ancestor so it could just be a coincidence.")

My grandfather wrote several books on our family tree (pre-internet) in which he was VERY careful to be clear which tidbits of information were backed by solid research and which were inferences/speculation - and he's always peeved when the speculation shows up on sites like this and cites his books as "proof."

I've posted before about a family member that published a genealogy book about our family that was filled with inaccuracies - this happens more than we know (or want to) I'm afraid.

Oops, I see that we've moved on, sorry !
« Last Edit: July 15, 2014, 01:03:16 PM by Redneck Gravy »

#### MommyPenguin

• Hero Member
• Posts: 4456
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27950 on: July 15, 2014, 01:08:47 PM »
Speaking of grocery stores, the one that my husband and I patronized back in the day had a large bin set up in the front for donations to a soup kitchen.  (Still does, actually.)  My husband and I were on fairly good terms with the store's manager - until the day that Manager saw us buy some canned food and put it in the bin.  He started railing at us about how people who use soup kitchens are "freeloaders", and people like us were only "encouraging them to be lazy".

We still go to that store, but the manager is long gone.   I wonder if he mouthed off at the wrong person.

Wow, what a jerk!  It's really common in grocery stores anyway.  The Walmart I go to even has little prepared paper bags (stapled shut) that have food to donate, and you buy it and then drop it off in a box on the way out.

The only thing I don't like about donating through stores is that they get to claim that "they" donated whatever (time, money, food) when really their employees and customers did.  But I can see how it's really beneficial for charities anyway, because plenty of people might be willing to buy a $7 bag of food and drop it off on the way out the door than to take food by a church, soup kitchen, or other dropoff point, or try to figure out how to donate. #### gramma dishes • Super Hero! • Posts: 8182 ##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories « Reply #27951 on: July 15, 2014, 02:01:12 PM » ... The only thing I don't like about donating through stores is that they get to claim that "they" donated whatever (time, money, food) when really their employees and customers did. ... Actually if you save the receipt you can certainly claim the donation as a tax deduction. (I'm assuming you're in the U.S.) #### siamesecat2965 • Super Hero! • Posts: 8756 ##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories « Reply #27952 on: July 15, 2014, 02:10:30 PM » The only thing I don't like about donating through stores is that they get to claim that "they" donated whatever (time, money, food) when really their employees and customers did. But I can see how it's really beneficial for charities anyway, because plenty of people might be willing to buy a$7 bag of food and drop it off on the way out the door than to take food by a church, soup kitchen, or other dropoff point, or try to figure out how to donate.

I've never really thought about this, but my favorite food drive was one a local group, boy scouts maybe?, held one time. They were at the local grocery store, and if you wanted, gave you a list of what was needed/appreciated as you went in, so if you chose to participate, you could shop off the list, or not, and they also had bins outside the exit, where you could drop your donations. They weren't pushy, and if you said no thanks, no big deal.

And I don't know if planned or not, but what they needed also coincided with what was on sale that week! I took the list, and bought some things and dropped them as I was leaving. The only work on my part was bagging them separately from my own stuff!

#### AngelicGamer

• Hero Member
• Posts: 4060
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27953 on: July 15, 2014, 03:49:02 PM »
I'm going to nominate the two women who took up the massage chairs at the mall today.  They sat down at the same time I did, no money was put in (you can put in a dollar for 3 minutes and there's a 5 dollar and 10 dollar option), and took up their two chairs plus the two other on the other side of them by block with their kids in strollers.  When I sat down in the chair at the end, the only free one, I was given a glare and then they were talking in super fast Russian.  Well, what to me is super fast Russian and might be normal speed for them.

I get that people have to sit and sometimes it has to be now, but the glare was the icing on the SS cupcake for me.

"Life's tough, huh?  And then you die." ~ Buck, the Magnificent Seven.

#### tinkytinky

• Member
• Posts: 441
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27954 on: July 15, 2014, 04:03:43 PM »
I'm going to nominate the two women who took up the massage chairs at the mall today.  They sat down at the same time I did, no money was put in (you can put in a dollar for 3 minutes and there's a 5 dollar and 10 dollar option), and took up their two chairs plus the two other on the other side of them by block with their kids in strollers.  When I sat down in the chair at the end, the only free one, I was given a glare and then they were talking in super fast Russian.  Well, what to me is super fast Russian and might be normal speed for them.

I get that people have to sit and sometimes it has to be now, but the glare was the icing on the SS cupcake for me.

I love those chairs! This was interesting to me, because at my local mall, you can't just sit in the chairs without a very loud voice requesting money "Please deposit bills now" every 5 seconds or so. Not very relaxing!

Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

#### nayberry

• Member
• Posts: 816
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27955 on: July 15, 2014, 05:02:47 PM »
I saw a guy on TV yesterday while watching one of those criminal clip shows where they show various people breaking the law in a dumb or a unusual manner. He seemed like a bit of a special snowflake to me. But I wasn't sure.

He got pulled over for doing like fifty five in a thirty five zone. So cop pulls him over. He tells the cop he doesn't have a licence so cop goes to go look it up in the system. Cop then finds out it had expired in 1969!! So the cop goes over and calmly asks the man why he hadn't renewed his licence in thirty three years.

The man's reasoning. He couldn't pass the vision test. So the man was driving legally blind for all that time. Holy cow. I am thinking he was a bit of a special snowflake for endangering people like that. You can not drive if you can't pass the vision test for safety reasons I am guessing. But  maybe the guy really needed his car and figured if he didn't get pull over it wouldn't matter. He did end up getting arrested.

i'm jsut rereading the thread for some entertainment, and saw this one,  i just watched the very same show yesterday

#### AngelicGamer

• Hero Member
• Posts: 4060
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27956 on: July 15, 2014, 05:16:43 PM »
I'm going to nominate the two women who took up the massage chairs at the mall today.  They sat down at the same time I did, no money was put in (you can put in a dollar for 3 minutes and there's a 5 dollar and 10 dollar option), and took up their two chairs plus the two other on the other side of them by block with their kids in strollers.  When I sat down in the chair at the end, the only free one, I was given a glare and then they were talking in super fast Russian.  Well, what to me is super fast Russian and might be normal speed for them.

I get that people have to sit and sometimes it has to be now, but the glare was the icing on the SS cupcake for me.

I love those chairs! This was interesting to me, because at my local mall, you can't just sit in the chairs without a very loud voice requesting money "Please deposit bills now" every 5 seconds or so. Not very relaxing!

Huh... ours don't.  I doubt the moms would have sat if they did that.  I would be okay with doing that because I get out my money before butt hits the chair.

"Life's tough, huh?  And then you die." ~ Buck, the Magnificent Seven.

#### MommyPenguin

• Hero Member
• Posts: 4456
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27957 on: July 15, 2014, 08:43:03 PM »

The only thing I don't like about donating through stores is that they get to claim that "they" donated whatever (time, money, food) when really their employees and customers did.  But I can see how it's really beneficial for charities anyway, because plenty of people might be willing to buy a \$7 bag of food and drop it off on the way out the door than to take food by a church, soup kitchen, or other dropoff point, or try to figure out how to donate.

I've never really thought about this, but my favorite food drive was one a local group, boy scouts maybe?, held one time. They were at the local grocery store, and if you wanted, gave you a list of what was needed/appreciated as you went in, so if you chose to participate, you could shop off the list, or not, and they also had bins outside the exit, where you could drop your donations. They weren't pushy, and if you said no thanks, no big deal.

And I don't know if planned or not, but what they needed also coincided with what was on sale that week! I took the list, and bought some things and dropped them as I was leaving. The only work on my part was bagging them separately from my own stuff!

My kids just finished a VBS program that was collecting for a food bank.  They had a theme each day, based on the food bank's urgent needs (breakfast, pasta, kid-friendly, etc.) and if the kids brought in 200 a day they got to throw a pie in the face of a pastor, which seemed a popular incentive.  . The total ended up being about 1800 items in the 5 says, not bad!

Gramma dishes, I didn't know that.  How would you show that you'd donated the items?

#### gramma dishes

• Super Hero!
• Posts: 8182
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27958 on: July 15, 2014, 09:28:13 PM »
...   Gramma dishes, I didn't know that.  How would you show that you'd donated the items?

You itemize.

Keep the applicable receipts.  It should indicate on the receipt which amount was for the charity.  Circle it and either copy them (you can put several on a single sheet of paper) or staple them together.  You are unlikely to be asked for proof, but just in case you are you will have it ready to go.
« Last Edit: July 15, 2014, 09:30:34 PM by gramma dishes »

#### jedikaiti

• Swiss Army Nerd
• Hero Member
• Posts: 2786
• A pie in the hand is worth two in the mail.
##### Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #27959 on: July 15, 2014, 09:34:46 PM »
I've never seen a store receipt that differentiates between what you buy to place in a collection box at the store, and what you buy to take home. I mean, you can split the transactions, but even then the receipt doesn't say that the items in that order were donated to XYZ Charity.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture