Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 5789564 times)

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Twik

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18930 on: January 15, 2013, 10:01:28 AM »
JadeAngel's story reminded me of going out for dinner with our friends, John and Jane, and Jane's brother Cheapskate.   My husband and I ordered an appetizer for the two of us to share, and before we'd even taken one bite, Cheapskate asked "Are you going to finish that?"   ???

I call him Cheapskate instead of, say, SS because his cheapness is legendary.   That bit of behaviour I described is typical - he'll deliberately order a very small meal to save money, assuming that other people at the table won't be able to finish their food.  If and when that happens, he swoops in and eats the leftovers off people's plates (without asking if they'd planned to have them boxed up to take home).
Hi! I think Cheapskate is my long lost twin.  I don't eat much and most meals are way too much for me to finish in one sitting, which is why my nickname is "Midnight 'Doggy bag' Kitty."  When I am in a situation where I can't do the doggy bag routine, I order an appetiser or salad to be served with everyone else's dinner.  DH usually lets me have a couple bites of whatever he's having.  Last time I did this, we were dining with 2 other people.  Both of them gave me something off their plates, too.  One said, "I can't eat both pieces of bread.  Would you like one?"  I left after eating a sufficient amount of food and minimized the amount that was thrown out.  Win - win  >:D

It's win-win if the people eating with you *really* don't want the extra food. However, if you're sitting there with two scoops of salad, staring wistfully at everyone else's Lobster Newburg, until they fork over part of their meal out of guilt, it's only a win for you. It's a loss (in food plus enjoyment) for everyone else.

I'd say if you're looking so hungry that someone is passing over their bread, you just might be overdoing it. And if you are not full until three other people provide you with part of their own dinners, you were hungry enough you could have eaten your own meal.
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

Elfmama

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18931 on: January 15, 2013, 10:01:33 AM »
So of course, I get SS-I-Sing-With-The-Movie. I did lean over and asked her to please stop singing. What does she do? Sing softer. 

I give up.
I can't tell you how many times I've had to elbow DH at a concert and hiss "People around you want to hear the performer, not you!"
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Rohanna

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18932 on: January 15, 2013, 10:04:23 AM »
Oh, yeah, but there's a difference between people offering you the food they can't finish and Cheapskate assuming that he somehow has the right to take everyone's leftovers.

I have another example of his parsimony - a group of us visited the Dominical Republic one January.  Cheapskate is an avid golfer and brought his clubs, talking excitedly about how he couldn't wait to hit the links.  (We live in a very cold climate, and usually the earliest he'd be able to golf is April.)  When we arrived at the resort, Cheapskate asked the front desk clerk about using the golf course.  The clerk told him where he had to go, then added "It costs ten dollars per day."  Cheapskate's expression was a sight to behold.  He sputtered "It's not INCLUDED?"  "Well ... no."  That was it.  He didn't golf.

Don't you love it when a person's behavior is its own punishment?

I don't know, most people I know who behaved like this ended up paying off their mortgage faster that anyone else and had really comfortable later lives.

Not really. Even in their "later lives," they spend their time worrying about how to save those extra pennies. They don't relax and spend their money then.

My father in law is like this- he refused to spend anything, as they were saving it all for retirement, when they were going to do "everything". My husband and I helped our mother in law get him to finally agree to take his wife on a trip she'd always wanted to do- though he grumbled about the cost incessantly. She died of cancer a year later- 5 years before retirement. He still won't spend anything- though he's long retired, and he still grumbles about how much everything costs. I don't know what he's waiting for...  :-\
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Cami

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18933 on: January 15, 2013, 10:08:18 AM »
I feel your pain. I saw a production of 'Othello' at the Globe in London a few years ago. There was a man seated immediately behind us who was translating for his girlfriend (at a normal, conversational volume) the whole.way.through. Eventually both we, and 2 others people nearby asked him to stop. He got really indignant and said his grldfriend couldn't understand and we were being selfish. He only stopped after we spoke to a steward.

What got me, apart from the entitled attitude, was  is that this production was sold out, and it sold out (except for standing room) really  fast, so they almost certainly booked the tickets 2-3 months before the performance. And it is not exactly hard to get copies of the play in whatever language you want, in fact the theatre itself has a bookshop attached to it.

Dfortunately the steards, after speaking to him, stayed quite near by for the rest of the performance and when he started again about 10 minutes into the second act they reminded him and warned him he would have to leave if he didn't stop

A couple of years ago my dd and I had a similar experience with a short-run show on Broadway. The tickets had sold out early and it was a full house. There was a large group of people in front of us who were loudly speaking in a foreign language before the show. I hoped they'd button it when the curtain rose. No such luck. What they then did was play a game of LOUD telephone as the person on the far right translated the play into Spanish and then the person told their seat mate to the left and so on, for a total of 10 people. Did I mention they were LOUD? Shushing and glares did nothing. I finally told them to shut their mouths in Spanish. They then complained to me that without translating they couldn't understand.  Not.Our.Problem.

weeblewobble

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18934 on: January 15, 2013, 10:30:58 AM »
I had sort of an opposite experience.  We went to a performance of La Boheme in a nearby large Southern city.   We don't speak Italian, but we read the English version of story ahead of time and knew the general story, and we figured that music would sort of speak for itself.

When the show started, we realized that the lyrics were translated into English on a small screen above the stage.  It was very discreet and didn't detract or distract from the performance.  We were grateful that it was there. 

As soon as the words start appearing on the screen, the woman in front of us moaned, "Oh, NOOOO."  And proceeded to gripe loudly about the translation service and how it cheapened the performance and how this sort of thing didn't happen in northern cities, all people in the south are so stupid they have to be spoon-fed everything.  On and on she went, to the point that someone went and got an usher to address it.  When the usher asked her to be quiet, she claimed that she was voicing everybody's opinion about how distracting the translation service was.  A prim lady two rows away piped up, "Actually, ma'am, your rudeness has been far more distracting that any silly words on the screen.  If you're not enjoying the show, please do us all a favor and leave!"

Translator Hater stayed, but acted put out with all of us for not supporting her (in calling us all stupid) and huffed off at intermission. She didn't come back.

Thipu1

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18935 on: January 15, 2013, 10:31:28 AM »
I had a similar situation with a Grad School course. 

At the first meeting, the Professor announced that we were to take the same seat for the duration of the course so he could more easily remember our names. No problem there.

However, right behind me was a group of three ladies.  It turned out that the two on the ends were not proficient in English and the one in the middle was their interpreter.  She kept up a sentence by sentence simultaneous translation during the entire two hours of the class.  I have to admit that it was a spectacular performance but it was  almost impossible to concentrate on the lecture.  I knew I couldn't sit through two hours, twice a week for 13 weeks with this going on.  I wasn't the only one.
Even the Prof was giving them the stink eye. 

He must have had a 'Come to the deity' meeting with the trio because they never came back. 


Shalamar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18936 on: January 15, 2013, 11:08:48 AM »
Quote
I don't know, most people I know who behaved like this ended up paying off their mortgage faster that anyone else and had really comfortable later lives.

Well, for what it's worth, Cheapskate is in his 40's, is unmarried, and lives with his parents.  He has a full-time job, so I can only imagine that financially he's doing better than some folks (unless his parents charge him an arm and a leg for rent).

nutraxfornerves

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18937 on: January 15, 2013, 11:37:13 AM »
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When the show started, we realized that the lyrics were translated into English on a small screen above the stage.  It was very discreet and didn't detract or distract from the performance.  We were grateful that it was there. 
Those are called "supertitles," and they are ubiquitous at opera performances in the US. In fact, where I live, the supertitles often are in English & Spanish.

If Translation Hater had never seen a supertitle before, then she can't be the real opera lover she claimed to be.

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TurtleDove

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18938 on: January 15, 2013, 11:38:39 AM »
Quote
When the show started, we realized that the lyrics were translated into English on a small screen above the stage.  It was very discreet and didn't detract or distract from the performance.  We were grateful that it was there. 
Those are called "supertitles," and they are ubiquitous at opera performances in the US. In fact, where I live, the supertitles often are in English & Spanish.

If Translation Hater had never seen a supertitle before, then she can't be the real opera lover she claimed to be.

Agreed.  I saw Othello while in Prague in maybe 1995 and it was sung in Italian and supertitled in presumably Czech.  This is not even something new.

mmswm

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18939 on: January 15, 2013, 11:48:06 AM »
Quote
When the show started, we realized that the lyrics were translated into English on a small screen above the stage.  It was very discreet and didn't detract or distract from the performance.  We were grateful that it was there. 
Those are called "supertitles," and they are ubiquitous at opera performances in the US. In fact, where I live, the supertitles often are in English & Spanish.

If Translation Hater had never seen a supertitle before, then she can't be the real opera lover she claimed to be.

Agreed.  I saw Othello while in Prague in maybe 1995 and it was sung in Italian and supertitled in presumably Czech.  This is not even something new.

I was playing in pit orchestras between 1991 and 1994 (hiking accident ended my music career).  The supertitles were present even then. I remember watching a few operas in the late 80's that didn't have them, but by the mid 90's they were pretty much everywhere.  The only opera I remember not having them later than that was a production of Hansel and Gretel that was performed in English to an English speaking audience. 

Now, whether or not they detract from the performance is another debate, but not one that's appropriate during the actual performance.
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Cami

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18940 on: January 15, 2013, 12:02:52 PM »
Oh, yeah, but there's a difference between people offering you the food they can't finish and Cheapskate assuming that he somehow has the right to take everyone's leftovers.

I have another example of his parsimony - a group of us visited the Dominical Republic one January.  Cheapskate is an avid golfer and brought his clubs, talking excitedly about how he couldn't wait to hit the links.  (We live in a very cold climate, and usually the earliest he'd be able to golf is April.)  When we arrived at the resort, Cheapskate asked the front desk clerk about using the golf course.  The clerk told him where he had to go, then added "It costs ten dollars per day."  Cheapskate's expression was a sight to behold.  He sputtered "It's not INCLUDED?"  "Well ... no."  That was it.  He didn't golf.

Don't you love it when a person's behavior is its own punishment?

I don't know, most people I know who behaved like this ended up paying off their mortgage faster that anyone else and had really comfortable later lives.

Not really. Even in their "later lives," they spend their time worrying about how to save those extra pennies. They don't relax and spend their money then.

My father in law is like this- he refused to spend anything, as they were saving it all for retirement, when they were going to do "everything". My husband and I helped our mother in law get him to finally agree to take his wife on a trip she'd always wanted to do- though he grumbled about the cost incessantly. She died of cancer a year later- 5 years before retirement. He still won't spend anything- though he's long retired, and he still grumbles about how much everything costs. I don't know what he's waiting for...  :-\
They're not waiting for anything. They get something right now out of what they're doing. They get something out of the process of being a cheapskate or by the act of hoarding money or by controlling others with the withholding or distribution of the money.

Cheapskates often enjoy being able to brag about how little they spend or how they "win" by "saving" money. (Or in my MIL's case by doing what the rest of us called stealing, but which she called, "Being thrifty and smart".)

Some people get a thrill out of controlling others with money.

For the hoarders, it's kind of like a Scrooge sitting there salivating at the sight of the coins stacked in front of them. It's not about what the money can do for you, it's about the sight of money in stacks on its own. Just like the guys who collect action figures and leave them in their boxes in a dark room and never looks at them. 

The means becomes the end.

It's kind of like my MIL who talked incessantly about how once she could afford a house, her primary focus was going to be on hosting the family parties. Which she did -- funeral and baptism receptions, baby and wedding showers, Christmas and Easter, major birthday milestone parties -- all in her basement. She had a fully decorated home complete with large living and dining rooms and no one was allowed to set foot in them. They had to be kept untouched because she was "waiting for an important enough occasion." My dh called her on it and asked what that occasion might be and when pressed, she admitted that she couldn't imagine any occasion "worthy of my living room. Maybe... i the pope visited. Maybe." She said she liked to stand in the doorway and look at this untouched room and seeing it unused made her happy. She added that just imagining people in those rooms made her upset and anxious because some small damage might occur. One day when dd was a toddler, she wandered into the forbidden room and fell down and cried. My MIL basically stepped on her to get to the wall and make sure that dd hadn't left a mark on the wall when she fell down.
« Last Edit: January 15, 2013, 12:12:28 PM by Cami »

Twik

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18941 on: January 15, 2013, 12:08:07 PM »
Now, whether or not they detract from the performance is another debate, but not one that's appropriate during the actual performance.

I recall one performance where the poor tenor must have been terribly unsettled when the audience started to laugh during his solo. He couldn't see that the subtitles had just come up with the Blue Screen of Death.
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

paintpots

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18942 on: January 15, 2013, 12:28:51 PM »
I once went to my local University's comedy club show. The comedy club is fairly famous, and their shows are well known for being geared towards 18+ i.e. plenty of (v. strong) swearing, sexual innuendo etc. DBF and I took his parents, looking forward to a good time. For some reason, a couple in the row behind me had brought their 8 year old daughter, and proceeded to explain every single joke to her at normal volume. I never heard the daughter actually ask for clarification, but her mother kept on for the entire first half. 

After sitting through the first half with my teeth gritted I did (very politely) ask her parents if they could at least keep it down, and to be fair to them, I didn't hear a peep in the second half, but I still couldn't figure out why on earth they had brought her to such a show if they didn't think she'd understand it, let alone that it was unsuitable!

heartmug

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18943 on: January 15, 2013, 01:37:09 PM »
My guess is that it is like when I have seen 4 or 5 or 6 year olds at the movies when it is R rated:  it is cheaper than a babysitter (as one couple told me).
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weeblewobble

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #18944 on: January 15, 2013, 02:44:20 PM »
Quote
When the show started, we realized that the lyrics were translated into English on a small screen above the stage.  It was very discreet and didn't detract or distract from the performance.  We were grateful that it was there. 
Those are called "supertitles," and they are ubiquitous at opera performances in the US. In fact, where I live, the supertitles often are in English & Spanish.

If Translation Hater had never seen a supertitle before, then she can't be the real opera lover she claimed to be.

Well, her tone was that of, 'I can't believe I have to put up with this again!"  So I think she'd experienced it before, she just wanted to show everybody that she was above it.