This really belongs in the Brain Hurt thread but, since that no longer exists, I'll put it here.
Back in my library days, we had a request. Someone wanted to write, 'Sorry about the broken leg. Good luck, King Tut' on a friend's cast. This was a cute idea but he wanted to write it in Egyptian hieroglyphs and I was supposed to tell him how to do it OVER THE PHONE!
'Okay, let's start. Quail chick, dish, forearm, vulture, animal skin, face-forward human head, begin cartouche ...'
Because I don't read hieroglyphs, this was total bushwah on my part but the request was absurd and I was feeling a bit frisky that day.
At that point he decided that this was a bit more than he bargained for and hung up.
Sometimes, you can nail the SS people.