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Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 6433159 times)

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magician5

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20670 on: April 24, 2013, 04:12:54 PM »
I volunteer at a museum, where I do programs for 4th graders (about age 9). At one point, I show them a sample of real gold. About every 4th or 5th program, one of the students will say "Can I have it?" in that tone that implies "Ask and ye shall receive." I've been wondering why so many kids seem to think that a museum will be happy to hand over a valuable specimen, just because they asked.

I remember when my daughter was small and asked for something that she plain couldn't have - I can't remember what it was, but for the sake of argument, let's say that it was a very expensive toy.  The way she phrased it was "Please will you buy me that?"  When I said "No, honey, it's too expensive," she sputtered in outrage "But I said PLEASE!".  :)

To my mind, neither of these children's actions come as surprises.

Regarding the first instance, I heard an anecdote long ago in which a volunteer in a poor foreign country played his harmonica, and was immediately beseiged by local children asking to be given the harmonica. All he could say (and a very good idea it was) was "I wish I could give you a harmonica. ... and I wish I could give you two harmonicas ... and I wish I could give you a thousand harmonicas ..." It was far better than just closing down and saying "no".

In the second case ("...but I said PLEASE...") it's really that the child needs to learn the other half of the lesson. How often do we treat children somewhat like dogs, dangling treats and demanding that they say "please" before we'll give them the treat? Again, it should help to explain "I wish I could buy it for you, but I just can't".
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.

MariaE

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20671 on: April 24, 2013, 04:25:44 PM »
I remember when my daughter was small and asked for something that she plain couldn't have - I can't remember what it was, but for the sake of argument, let's say that it was a very expensive toy.  The way she phrased it was "Please will you buy me that?"  When I said "No, honey, it's too expensive," she sputtered in outrage "But I said PLEASE!".  :)

I remember Michelle doing that in Full House.

Michelle: May I have that cookie, please?
DJ: No, you may not.
Michelle: But I was polite and said please!
DJ: And I was polite and said 'No, you may not'.
Michelle: That's it! Politeness week is OVER!!!
 
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MrTango

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20672 on: April 24, 2013, 04:30:09 PM »
My grandpa found a solution to the squirrel/bird feeder problem: electric fence.

Since he operated a dairy farm, they already had an electric fence around the pastures, so it was an easy task to run a cable to his bird feeder and install a chicken-wire basket around the iron pole (insulated with a heavy-duty rubber wrap).

I was surprised that the shock (voltage meant to contain large animals) didn't seem to do any lasting harm to the little squirrels.  I was also surprised that it frequently took 3-4 tries before a squirrel would give up.

If the squirrels weren't in contact with the ground, they wouldn't necessarily get a shock.

The feeder was mounted to an iron pole.  Anything touching the pole was grounded just as if it was standing on the lawn.

Shalamar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20673 on: April 24, 2013, 05:11:53 PM »
Heh.  As I recall, my reaction was "You were very polite, and I'm proud of you for that.  But I can't afford to buy it, and I'm afraid 'please' won't make a difference." 

Thipu1

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20674 on: April 24, 2013, 05:25:11 PM »
Heh.  As I recall, my reaction was "You were very polite, and I'm proud of you for that.  But I can't afford to buy it, and I'm afraid 'please' won't make a difference."

In the early days of E-Hell someone had a wonderful sig about this.

  It was a strip cartoon.  A very little kid asked for a 'live elephant' with pleasant but quite smug body language and was told that the answer was ''NO'.  The kid threw a  fit and complained that he had, 'Asked nicely'.  His Mom responded that, 'Asking nicely won't always get you what you want'. this is something that children need to learn.


faithlessone

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20675 on: April 24, 2013, 05:36:43 PM »
Heh.  As I recall, my reaction was "You were very polite, and I'm proud of you for that.  But I can't afford to buy it, and I'm afraid 'please' won't make a difference."

In the early days of E-Hell someone had a wonderful sig about this.

  It was a strip cartoon.  A very little kid asked for a 'live elephant' with pleasant but quite smug body language and was told that the answer was ''NO'.  The kid threw a  fit and complained that he had, 'Asked nicely'.  His Mom responded that, 'Asking nicely won't always get you what you want'. this is something that children need to learn.

My grandmother used to say that "Asking nicely won't always get you want you want, but demanding rudely never will." (She was also very firm that simply saying the word 'please' didn't count as asking nicely, if it was said in a demanding tone!!)

Katana_Geldar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20676 on: April 24, 2013, 05:44:18 PM »
A response may be "Well, perhaps someone be fortunate enough to get one at Christmas/birthday".

Kids need to be also taught that good things are worth waiting for.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20677 on: April 24, 2013, 05:47:27 PM »
I sing to my kids when they whine about wanting something.  "You can't always get what you want..."
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

RingTailedLemur

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20678 on: April 24, 2013, 06:01:15 PM »

Giggity

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20679 on: April 24, 2013, 06:05:23 PM »
I get that a lot at faire.

Kid: "What's that?"
Me: "It's me skillet."
Kid: "What's it for?"
Me: "Well, it's for keepin' me husband in line, innit?"
Kid: "Can I have it?"

All I can figure is, at some point that stratagem must have worked, because otherwise why would they do it.
Words mean things.

Mental Magpie

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kherbert05

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20681 on: April 24, 2013, 06:26:24 PM »
I saw this in Slate yesterday:

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/04/food_allergies_and_playgrounds_please_don_t_bring_snacks_to_playgrounds.html

What do you all think? I'm tempted to hand the author the Special Snowflake of the Year award.
I say that the woman has a valid point but takes it a little to far. From a couple of the comments RE: Peanut proteins on hands I'm guessing her child has the extreme form of peanut allergy. That if a child eating cracker jacks does the hand over hand bars - an her child follows her child can have a potentially deadly allergic reaction.


When I was a kid there were places we had to be careful because of the high probability that someone touched that door, railing, seat, armrest with peanuts on their hands. So I wore my "biohazard suit" - long pants, closed toed shoes, short sleeves but with an oversized very light windbreaker. When I had to touch a door, or railing - I pulled my hands inside the sleeves - so I wasn't touching it bare handed. Thing was those places were limited - airplanes, Astrodome (football, baseball, rodeo), Astroworld, and the movies were pretty much it. Because people didn't walk around stuffing their faces all the time. You ate in certain places - not the middle of the department store.


We knew I could react to touching peanut products - but in only happened 2x before I turned 18. First in PK when the teacher physically force me to put my hands in peanutbutter. Second in third grade when the bully smeared peanut butter on me.


Since 2001 - I've landed in the ER 7x all for touching something with traces of peanuts. All but one happened in public venues were eating was not the main focus.


I get her frustration. Kids eating peanut products while playing on the playground are coating it with a toxic to her child substance. Also I agree on a basic level kids should not be eating and runnign around playing at the same time. It is a choking hazard.


On the other side if Loren, Brett and I are having a picnic in the park. I should be able to leave our cooler/basket out while they play.
Don't Teach Them For Your Past. Teach Them For Their Future

Rohanna

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20682 on: April 24, 2013, 06:43:51 PM »
Sorry, if your child is THAT allergic then "uncontrolled" spaces need to be off-limits/monitored for you, not the whole world. I mean, squirrels run around playgrounds and they eat nuts, birds drop nuts and seeds...
My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world. ~ Jack Layton.

blue2000

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20683 on: April 24, 2013, 07:14:31 PM »
Sorry, if your child is THAT allergic then "uncontrolled" spaces need to be off-limits/monitored for you, not the whole world. I mean, squirrels run around playgrounds and they eat nuts, birds drop nuts and seeds...

But they don't leave squishy handprints on the playground equipment.

I can sympathise with her. I have contact allergies and I wear gloves in certain situations. I'd have no skin left otherwise! But she should be able to use the playground without putting her hand in something yucky. Sadly, it sounds like the one they go to has a big littering problem so I don't think she is going to get what she wants.
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Dr. F.

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #20684 on: April 24, 2013, 08:19:05 PM »
A cross between SS-ness and pure Darwinism - the people who decided to jaywalk at a crosswalk, but against the walk signal, IMMEDIATELY in front of a fire engine going lights-and-sirens. Don't they realize that those things can't stop on a dime? They didn't even scurry - they strolled casually across the street.