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Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 6255384 times)

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Amara

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21030 on: May 15, 2013, 06:42:21 PM »
*begging voice*

Please, please, please, can we not do any more ... uh YIKES stories, at least not unless the poster whites out the information. I cannot express how icked out I am right now and getting more so by the minute.

Thank you!

Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21031 on: May 15, 2013, 06:47:27 PM »
Made a YIKES thread for these... I'm oddly curious.  :D
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Amava

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21032 on: May 15, 2013, 06:49:43 PM »
People will, of course, abuse the system.  They will be playing games on Facebook, then realize their time is almost up and come back to tell us they are filling job applications and need more time.  We will give them a half hour and then check on them....and if they are playing farmville, they lose their priviliges for the day. 
But but but... their crops will wither and it's YOUR fault!  >:D

stitchygreyanonymouse

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21033 on: May 15, 2013, 06:57:36 PM »
Sorry, I whited it out in the original post. I didn’t think about the squick factor, since I heard the story so long ago.

MommyPenguin, yes, she did somehow. However I don’t know if she chose to not bf my other step-sister because of issues, or just the psychological part of it all.

VorFemme

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21034 on: May 15, 2013, 07:02:31 PM »
I know it's the nature of babies to be SS, but Baby really took the cake today! I was nursing him, but he was more bored than hungry, so he decided to combine his two greatest amusement. Nursing, and showing off his new teeth. He bit me so hard I yelped. And my reaction startled him, so he started sobbing. So, Baby bites me and I end up comforting him  ::)

My step-sister was the specialest of snowflakes, then—she bit my step-mom’s nipple off! Hearing stores of having done that put her off nursing her own children completely.


Okay, I'm not even that gender at this point in my life, and I nearly fainted from reading that.  YIKES.

OK, I'm holding the girls right now... I swear they just lurched in my bra.

Yep... They tried to reverse-grow back into my chest.

I think mine are currently cowering behind shoulderblades and trembling


Mine are demanding a brass bra.  Which, come to think of it, is a lot of brass!  It's going to be heavy and expensive.....but with the Renn Faire in ten days, I will be STYLING, girlfriend!

Broke from paying for it, but styling!
« Last Edit: May 15, 2013, 10:13:09 PM by VorFemme »
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

Slartibartfast

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21035 on: May 15, 2013, 07:12:58 PM »
I know it's the nature of babies to be SS, but Baby really took the cake today! I was nursing him, but he was more bored than hungry, so he decided to combine his two greatest amusement. Nursing, and showing off his new teeth. He bit me so hard I yelped. And my reaction startled him, so he started sobbing. So, Baby bites me and I end up comforting him  ::)

My step-sister was the specialest of snowflakes, then—she bit my step-mom’s nipple off! Hearing stores of having done that put her off nursing her own children completely.


Okay, I'm not even that gender at this point in my life, and I nearly fainted from reading that.  YIKES.

OK, I'm holding the girls right now... I swear they just lurched in my bra.

Yep... They tried to reverse-grow back into my chest.

I think mine are currently cowering behind shoulderblades and trembling


Mine are demanding a brass bra.  Which, come to think of it, is a lot of brass!  It's going to be heavy and expensive.....but with the Renn Faire in ten days, I will be STYLING, girlfriend!

Reminds me of the poor guy in my eighth-grade English class who had to read aloud and misread "the iron brazier in the corner" as "the iron brassiere."  And then didn't understand why half the class was laughing.

Virg

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21036 on: May 16, 2013, 10:52:06 AM »
VorFemme wrote:

"Mine are demanding a brass bra."

Gives a whole new meaning to "brassiere".

Virg

Miss Misha

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21037 on: May 16, 2013, 07:30:58 PM »
Or that old expression about "It's colder than a brass bra in a snow storm". 
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Somehow that fits on sooooo many levels.

mbbored

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21038 on: May 16, 2013, 07:36:21 PM »
This past weekend I went to a baby shower. About an hour after the party started, a friend who freely admits that she doesn't pay attention to instructions stormed in and we had the following exchange:

SS: mbbored, I am so angry at you right now.
Me: Excuse me?
SS: You've been ignoring my phone calls.
Me: When was this? I haven't gotten any calls from you recently.
SS: In the last hour!
Me: Well, I'm sorry, but I had my ringer off to enjoy the party.
SS: But I needed you to give me directions!
Me: Don't you have a GPS in your car?
SS: Yes, but I prefer your directions. You should've helped me get here!
Other Friend: So she was supposed miss part of the party because you wanted to leave late and didn't want to use your built-in GPS or your smartphone?
SS: You don't understand me!
Me: I guess not. I'm going to go get some of that bean dip over there.
Other Friend: Sounds delicious. I'll join you!

Nikko-chan

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21039 on: May 16, 2013, 07:52:36 PM »
bwahahahha! So she expected you to just KNOW she needed help. And expected you to help her even though she has GPS....  ::)

WolfWay

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21040 on: May 17, 2013, 01:34:57 AM »
Ah, fresh piping hot justice!

Background: South Africa has a billion dollar informal minibus taxi industry. The minibuses are often unroadworthy and the drivers are a blizzard of special snowflakes and a law unto themselves. They very frequently completely ignore any and all traffic regulations, and the number of mindblowingly dangerous manouvres I've personally witnessed minibus taxi drivers pulling is too long to count (including things like doing a U-Turn across a four lane highway to drive the wrong way up the shoulder to pick up a passenger, or going the wrong way up a highway offramp to cut across the oncoming traffic to get to the lanes going the other way, or going diagonally across an intersection againt lights and traffic flow to end up blocking a slipway to drop off a passenger).

Anyway, this morning on my way to work I'm stopped at a red light and I see a taxi pull up next to me and then cheerfully (without even slowing down even slightly) continue on through the red light across the intersection. Practically an everyday occurence frankly. Pity he didn't notice the clearly marked traffic police car RIGHT behind him. The blue lights came on before the taxi's tailpipe had cleared the intersection and by the time I got a green light, he had been pulled over on the side of the road and the cop was stomping towards the snowflake-piloted taxi with a very irate look on his face.

It's pretty hard to miss traffic police cars here, they're white with intense bright orange stripes and stand out like a sore thumb.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2013, 01:36:55 AM by WolfWay »
It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian Tiger - from a distance, preferably separated by bars . -- Pearls Before Swine (16-May-2009)

bloo

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21041 on: May 17, 2013, 07:47:00 AM »
Make him a bargain - you will move the car seat BACK before getting out of the car every time you see that he's put the lid down on the toilet......ask sweetly.  Explain that you understand that it takes an extra second or three - but it really does look better for "clients".  And that him showing such consideration and love for YOU will help YOU remember to move the seat back.

Thanks for the tip! I will humble myself and try it.  ::)

siamesecat2965

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21042 on: May 17, 2013, 09:55:41 AM »
Ah, fresh piping hot justice!

Background: South Africa has a billion dollar informal minibus taxi industry. The minibuses are often unroadworthy and the drivers are a blizzard of special snowflakes and a law unto themselves. They very frequently completely ignore any and all traffic regulations, and the number of mindblowingly dangerous manouvres I've personally witnessed minibus taxi drivers pulling is too long to count (including things like doing a U-Turn across a four lane highway to drive the wrong way up the shoulder to pick up a passenger, or going the wrong way up a highway offramp to cut across the oncoming traffic to get to the lanes going the other way, or going diagonally across an intersection againt lights and traffic flow to end up blocking a slipway to drop off a passenger).

Anyway, this morning on my way to work I'm stopped at a red light and I see a taxi pull up next to me and then cheerfully (without even slowing down even slightly) continue on through the red light across the intersection. Practically an everyday occurence frankly. Pity he didn't notice the clearly marked traffic police car RIGHT behind him. The blue lights came on before the taxi's tailpipe had cleared the intersection and by the time I got a green light, he had been pulled over on the side of the road and the cop was stomping towards the snowflake-piloted taxi with a very irate look on his face.

It's pretty hard to miss traffic police cars here, they're white with intense bright orange stripes and stand out like a sore thumb.

hehe. On a side note, my cousin has been in Cape Town for the last almost 3 years for his job, and when he's home, I'm afraid to drive with him, as he drives like he's still in SA. He comes home for good this summer so hopefully his driving skills will improve :) - I'm just sad I wasn't able to go visit him while he was there. It looks beautiful!

nutraxfornerves

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21043 on: May 17, 2013, 11:05:23 AM »
From Customers Suck. No language issues that I see, but child death is mentioned. Crazy pregnant woman. Patient refuses to wait her turn in line at the doctor; makes outrageous statement as to why she should go ahead of the OP.

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Yarnspinner

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #21044 on: May 17, 2013, 01:15:35 PM »
Remember the cranky patron whose driver's license we misplaced a few weeks ago?  Well, he's back.  With a broken foot he supposedly got by saving a woman's dog after it ran out into traffic.  It seems she offered him money for his troubles and he (who demanded all sorts of cash from us for pain and suffering--and got it) turned it down because "I'm not someone who demands money from everyone."

My coworker who was dealing with him told me about Mr. Driver's License's latest complaint.

(Caveat:  he was right to be angry about the mix up with his license...but once his story started changing every hour, it got a lot harder to sympathise.)

His new complaint is that we won't let him "hang out" in the special archives so he can "hide from his girlfriend."  He's been coming in every day, trying to eat in a room with sensative materials, watching TV on his computer without benefit of headphones and demanding that the history groups meeting to discuss genealogy issues be quiet because he can't hear his movies.  And his girlfriend finds him and carries on knock down drag out fights with him.

Police haven't been called yet because he was sent packing, but he is furious that we won't let him disrupt the only quiet space we have since he is such a good patron.  The best part, I guess, was when he threatened the head of the archives with having another department head deal with her.  The archives head pointed out that she and the other department head are equals and that Other DH cannot fire her or make her change her rules.

My sinus headache is now a migraine.