Encountered this one a few weeks ago and I remember intending to post it here, but I forgot until today
The girls and I were flying to HomeState to visit my parents. MyCity's airport is pretty small, so usually going through security isn't too bad, but that morning it was on the long side. Enter SSImportantus.
He marched to the front of the line and demanded to use the "military line." The one the pilots use. Apparently he was under the impression that all military personnel get to go through security first, before the plebians (sorry, civilians
Why this is particularly SS: MyCity has an army base. We're a major center for department of defense research. Our airport is actually one of the most expensive in the country on average, mostly because so many people are flying from here to Washington DC and back in the same day and paying government (read: $$$$) rates for the tickets. Not all those contractors are actually military, but almost all of them are employed by either the army, the DoD, or NASA. The billboard ads in our airport are for things like missiles and rockets instead of real estate and sports teams.* Just looking around the security line, I would peg a good THIRD of the people waiting as "military."
The security officer rather curtly informed Mr. SS that if our airport had a separate military line, we'd still all be standing in it, and he was welcome to go to the back behind everyone else. Mr. SS argued a bit, but finally did as he was told.
*Which always confused me - do the advertisers really think someone's going to be walking through the airport and go "Ooh, you know what I need? A military helicopter! I would have never known where to look for one if I hadn't seen that ad! Awesome! Thanks, Boeing! I'll drop by on Tuesday!"