Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 5094147 times)

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Ceallach

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24345 on: November 09, 2013, 05:41:34 PM »
Once when showing a school available for rent to the NYC Dept of Education, I ran across the specialist snowflake of the day.

There was a little-used roadway between the school location and the apartment building across the street; when school was in session, the street was closed completely and after school hours, barricades narrowed it to one lane and the speed limit kept at 20 mph.

SS and her SS sister and her SS niece were in a very expensive SUV which came whipping 'round the corner and accelerated well past 20 mph.  Careening, the SUV leapt the curb and smacked headlong into the wrought iron gates which delineated the school yard to a height of about a story and a half.  The fence and gate were deeply embedded in the concrete of the yard, and had stood there since about 1911.

SUV driver got out of the car, her sister got out of the car, and the niece got out of the car.  All came over screaming at us that "it wasn't their fault  - that we had (wait for it) moved the street and gates so that they blocked her vehicle.  (Liberally laced with profanity.  Yes.  All of them, cursing like sailors, including the nine-year-old.)

When I said that they would have to stay and wait for the police to come (non-emergency, Queens, could be a while,) the nine-year-old sneered "what are you, a lawyer?"  "No, but I am," said our counsel, who was on this site tour with me.  "So am I," said the attorney for NYC's Department of Ed, who was also on the site visit.  All told, we had twenty people who were standing within 20 years of this occurrence, all of whom were either with the Department of Ed or with us as the property owners.

After 40 minutes of variously cursing, calling their husbands and having the husband demand that we "release" them, having them accuse us of holding them up for money, and other invectives and epithets, the driver suddenly remembered that the reason she was speeding home was that she had left her baby home alone, just a little baby, almost new, and that her husband would be mad if the baby were alone for so long and that she wasn't allowed to go out shopping which is what she was doing and that he was going to beat her now.

Department of Ed = mandatory child neglect and abuse reporters.  Out came the cell phones to report an abandoned child at  the address of the registered driver of the SUV (we had also asked for driver's licenses and photographed them with our cell phones as well as having the license number of the SUV which we provided to the police dispatcher.)

When the police finally arrived (another unit having gone to the house to check on the "baby",) we gave them our business cards and left, while our attorney stayed behind.  As we were all calling out farewells to each other as we streamed back to our cars or to the subway, the 9-year-old started screaming "They are leaving the scene of the accident!  We get to leave!  We demand to be free!"  The cop looked at the girl's mother and suggested that she get a refund for the tuition for the law school where the girl went.  Then pointed out to the driver that generally, there are two participants in an accident and that the wrought iron fence wasn't going anywhere.

I'd forgotten that story.

I love this story, thanks for sharing!
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Thipu1

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24346 on: November 09, 2013, 07:43:00 PM »
Oh my goodness.... I am with VorFemme.  laughing so hard I can't breathe.

I agree.  That story almost made me laugh off the back of my lap.

However, I do have a serious question.  Was there a baby at home?

VorFemme

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24347 on: November 09, 2013, 08:16:41 PM »
Oh my goodness.... I am with VorFemme.  laughing so hard I can't breathe.

I agree.  That story almost made me laugh off the back of my lap.

However, I do have a serious question.  Was there a baby at home?

Snarky & Evil will give you pretty good odds that there wasn't.  They do tend to the cynical...
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Nikko-chan

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24348 on: November 09, 2013, 09:32:26 PM »
Oh my goodness.... I am with VorFemme.  laughing so hard I can't breathe.

I agree.  That story almost made me laugh off the back of my lap.

However, I do have a serious question.  Was there a baby at home?

Snarky & Evil will give you pretty good odds that there wasn't.  They do tend to the cynical...

I'm with Snarky and Evil!

magician5

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24349 on: November 10, 2013, 02:10:50 AM »
A GOOD SS:

I just came out of 4 days in hospital. A systemic infection had made me weak and seriously clouded my mind. Between those problems and those awful hospital beds (they only fold where people don't bend) and strange surroundings, I couldn't even get out of bed by myself.

My neighbor was a 91-year-old Hispanic man who was determined to do exactly as he pleased. He'd get up and wander the halls on unsteady feet, which sent the staff scurrying to bring him back. Then, as soon as they got him back in bed, and they left, he'd take another trip, which started the commotion again. Not good for my sleep. He'd leave the TV on all night on the most horrid cable channel (I learned all about "as seen on TV" products, sleazy lawyers, televangelists and celebrity gossip) but thankfully, being mostly deaf, he didn't turn the sound on.

Sadly, bilingual people were not common on the staff. We all (staff and I) agreed that most of his restlessness came from being incredibly bored and also not entirely sure why he was there. I helped with a little Spanish (a little is all I have), and that resulted in his being provided a good chair so he could sit out in the hall watching the passing people. He finally got some sleep in the chair, I finally got another chair and sat in the hall too so I could get some sleep (studying ceiling tiles is BORING!) and I opined that when I get to 91, with my personality and stubbornness, I'm likely to be just like him.

He was annoying, but he made my stay tolerable.
« Last Edit: November 10, 2013, 02:16:12 AM by magician5 »
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greencat

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24350 on: November 10, 2013, 12:28:38 PM »
Parking garage SS:

I was waiting behind another car, who was waiting for the vehicle in front of them to move.  I saw the reverse lights of the vehicle on the rear passenger side of the car ahead of me come on - there was about 3 feet between the back of their parked car and the side of the trunk of the car ahead of me.  The car in the parking spot started to move back.  I honked when they got about a foot and a half from the car behind them.  They stopped.  They started backing up again.  I honked when they were 8" or so from the car ahead of me.  They stopped.  They started moving again.  They were about 3" away from the car ahead of me and I laid on my horn.  They stopped.  They then backed up again - into the other car.  I saw the car in front of me jiggle a little bit, and as the car backing out of the parking spot stopped and pulled forward at that point, they clearly knew their backward progress had been impeded.  The drivers of both cars got out, and started talking.  As expected, the driver of the car ahead of me came around to my window, and told me:

"The guy claims that he didn't hit me!  That he didn't feel anything!"

My gasted was flabbered.

TeamBhakta

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24351 on: November 10, 2013, 09:03:09 PM »
I had a lovely scare at work today. I was sitting outside eating lunch. SS decided to walk into traffic holding her kid's hand and talking on a cellphone, without checking for cars. Someone in a pickup truck had to slam on their brakes to avoid hitting SS. SS marched to the passenger side window, waved her arms around, pressed her face against the glass and yelled "WHAT THE HELL! WHY DON'T YOU LOOK WHERE YOU GOING! YOU ALMOST RAN ME OVER, FEMALE DOG! *to phone* Hold on a second, I'm gonna have to set down the phone down SO I CAN SHOOT THIS LADY!"  :o The pickup driver wisely drove away from the crazy lady. SS marched down the sidewalk yelling into her phone "What the hell is wrong with that female dog! She almost ran me over with her truck! Who does she think she is, barreling through the parking lot! Don't she see I'm a pedestrian trying to cross! And hello, can't she see I'm trying to have a conversation on my phone! I shouldn't have to watch out for her crazy a_s driving *turns to kid* Oh, I'm sorry,honey, that you almost got ran over by that lady who don't know how to drive."  I was going to call 911 if she'd actually pulled out a gun.
« Last Edit: November 10, 2013, 09:05:41 PM by TeamBhakta »

Ceallach

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24352 on: November 10, 2013, 10:38:57 PM »
I nominate my Dad based on a recent conversation we had. 

Dad:   Oh by the way you know cousin Mike is getting married next year
Me:     Yes I heard, but I also heard we're not invited
Dad:   What?
Me:     Yes I may be wrong but <Mike's sister> told <my sister> that they're just doing something small so not including all of the cousins etc
Dad:   Oh that's a shame.   I wonder if it's about money?    I should call them and offer to pay for all of our plates. 
Me:     I'm not sure if that's a good idea, they've probably already picked their venue so it might have a limit on headcount.

In his defense, he is a little bit wealthier than his relatives so does pay for things from time to time, for example taking Mike's parents (his sister and her husband) on vacation with him etc, which they appreciate, so from his perspective if it's a simple matter of finance then he should be able to fix it.     But given Mike and his fiance have probably agreed on who they want to attend their wedding - most like in consultation with Mike's fiance's family who she is very close to - I don't think calling and insisting that they should invite our whole family is reasonable, particularly given we don't know the actual situation e.g. who is going to be invited and the size of the wedding.    Did I mention that I have several siblings, plus our spouses and children, so inviting us isn't just an extra couple, we're talking about an extra 15 people!    :)
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MommyPenguin

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24353 on: November 11, 2013, 01:06:26 AM »
Oh my goodness.... I am with VorFemme.  laughing so hard I can't breathe.

I agree.  That story almost made me laugh off the back of my lap.

However, I do have a serious question.  Was there a baby at home?

I want to know, too!  The way the "baby" is in quotes makes me think that it was just an excuse... but it just seems like such an idiotic excuse to use if it isn't true.

KB

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24354 on: November 11, 2013, 01:27:12 AM »
I had a lovely scare at work today. I was sitting outside eating lunch. SS decided to walk into traffic holding her kid's hand and talking on a cellphone, without checking for cars. Someone in a pickup truck had to slam on their brakes to avoid hitting SS. SS marched to the passenger side window, waved her arms around, pressed her face against the glass and yelled "WHAT THE HELL! WHY DON'T YOU LOOK WHERE YOU GOING! YOU ALMOST RAN ME OVER, FEMALE DOG! *to phone* Hold on a second, I'm gonna have to set down the phone down SO I CAN SHOOT THIS LADY!"  :o The pickup driver wisely drove away from the crazy lady. SS marched down the sidewalk yelling into her phone "What the hell is wrong with that female dog! She almost ran me over with her truck! Who does she think she is, barreling through the parking lot! Don't she see I'm a pedestrian trying to cross! And hello, can't she see I'm trying to have a conversation on my phone! I shouldn't have to watch out for her crazy a_s driving *turns to kid* Oh, I'm sorry,honey, that you almost got ran over by that lady who don't know how to drive."  I was going to call 911 if she'd actually pulled out a gun.

I think you probably should have called them anyway!  :o

nuit93

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24355 on: November 11, 2013, 02:36:01 AM »
I nominate my Dad based on a recent conversation we had. 

Dad:   Oh by the way you know cousin Mike is getting married next year
Me:     Yes I heard, but I also heard we're not invited
Dad:   What?
Me:     Yes I may be wrong but <Mike's sister> told <my sister> that they're just doing something small so not including all of the cousins etc
Dad:   Oh that's a shame.   I wonder if it's about money?    I should call them and offer to pay for all of our plates. 
Me:     I'm not sure if that's a good idea, they've probably already picked their venue so it might have a limit on headcount.

In his defense, he is a little bit wealthier than his relatives so does pay for things from time to time, for example taking Mike's parents (his sister and her husband) on vacation with him etc, which they appreciate, so from his perspective if it's a simple matter of finance then he should be able to fix it.     But given Mike and his fiance have probably agreed on who they want to attend their wedding - most like in consultation with Mike's fiance's family who she is very close to - I don't think calling and insisting that they should invite our whole family is reasonable, particularly given we don't know the actual situation e.g. who is going to be invited and the size of the wedding.    Did I mention that I have several siblings, plus our spouses and children, so inviting us isn't just an extra couple, we're talking about an extra 15 people!    :)

Good on you for preventing your dad from being an extra-special snowflake!

Wulfie

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24356 on: November 11, 2013, 10:37:11 AM »
I did not witness it but heard about from one of the other waitresses at a place we go to for dinner a couple of times a week. A couple of soccer teams came in to eat, their bill was nearly $200.00 and they tipped $1.00 to the waitress. She was just about in tears she was so upset. With party that large, I am sure that they were her only table or if not, she only had 1-2 other tables for the hour or two that they were there.  I don't know if the manager was going to call the school about it or not, I told her to let me know the info and I would call, that was just outragious.

Our waitresss used to be one of the managers there and she called one of the local high schools to tell them that if they were going to send thier kids down there after early release, to let them know that tipping the wait staff was expected and that trashing the resturant was not acceptable behavor.

siamesecat2965

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24357 on: November 11, 2013, 10:52:13 AM »
I did not witness it but heard about from one of the other waitresses at a place we go to for dinner a couple of times a week. A couple of soccer teams came in to eat, their bill was nearly $200.00 and they tipped $1.00 to the waitress. She was just about in tears she was so upset. With party that large, I am sure that they were her only table or if not, she only had 1-2 other tables for the hour or two that they were there.  I don't know if the manager was going to call the school about it or not, I told her to let me know the info and I would call, that was just outragious.

Our waitresss used to be one of the managers there and she called one of the local high schools to tell them that if they were going to send thier kids down there after early release, to let them know that tipping the wait staff was expected and that trashing the resturant was not acceptable behavor.

That's horrible! Maybe they need to start instituting the instant gratuity for parties over x number.

And good for the waitress!  I did that for one summer, in a not-so-fancy family style restaurant. I can still recall a party of maybe 6 or so, whose bill came to just under $100, and they had me running like a headless chicken. No tip on the table, so I checked with the hostess/cashier to see if they had put one on the cc slip. Nope. I was so angry since I had given great service, and got nothing in return.

Snooks

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24358 on: November 11, 2013, 04:38:58 PM »
I did not witness it but heard about from one of the other waitresses at a place we go to for dinner a couple of times a week. A couple of soccer teams came in to eat, their bill was nearly $200.00 and they tipped $1.00 to the waitress. She was just about in tears she was so upset. With party that large, I am sure that they were her only table or if not, she only had 1-2 other tables for the hour or two that they were there.  I don't know if the manager was going to call the school about it or not, I told her to let me know the info and I would call, that was just outragious.

Our waitresss used to be one of the managers there and she called one of the local high schools to tell them that if they were going to send thier kids down there after early release, to let them know that tipping the wait staff was expected and that trashing the resturant was not acceptable behavor.

Sorry, but I don't think it had anything to do with you and you certainly shouldn't have been phoning anyone about it, what were you going to say?  It doesn't sound like you were there to witness it.

The waitress did the right thing by giving the school the head's up that their pupils had behaved that way, as long as she didn't expect a tip to be forthcoming after the call.

artk2002

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24359 on: November 11, 2013, 04:57:13 PM »
I did not witness it but heard about from one of the other waitresses at a place we go to for dinner a couple of times a week. A couple of soccer teams came in to eat, their bill was nearly $200.00 and they tipped $1.00 to the waitress. She was just about in tears she was so upset. With party that large, I am sure that they were her only table or if not, she only had 1-2 other tables for the hour or two that they were there.  I don't know if the manager was going to call the school about it or not, I told her to let me know the info and I would call, that was just outragious.

Our waitresss used to be one of the managers there and she called one of the local high schools to tell them that if they were going to send thier kids down there after early release, to let them know that tipping the wait staff was expected and that trashing the resturant was not acceptable behavor.

Sorry, but I don't think it had anything to do with you and you certainly shouldn't have been phoning anyone about it, what were you going to say?  It doesn't sound like you were there to witness it.

I think that a concerned citizen has the absolute right to raise the issue herself. If you don't want to get involved, then don't, but don't berate Wulfie for taking action.

I could turn it around on you. Wulfie's action didn't affect you at all, you weren't there, so why are you sticking your oar in? If you feel you can take Wulfie to task for her action, then you are exposing yourself to the exact same criticism.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. -Mark Twain