Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 5419563 times)

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Carotte

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24390 on: November 15, 2013, 03:03:50 PM »
I am a Dorothy Hamill hair worshipper - love, love my short wedge hair

CRUD MONKEYS! now you're telling me that makes me g@y

No wonder I can't catch a man, they must all think like that!  I used to have big Loretta Lynn hair - it still didn't help my man catching abilities...do you think it's me? I'm straight - should I wear a sign?

Uhuhuh, I laughed, I should tell a (guy) friend to have one done, the bane of his life is not being g@y since that's the only population that's atracted to him. At least it might cut down on the number of times he gets hit on by guys.

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24391 on: November 15, 2013, 03:15:19 PM »
I find this discussion particularly funny as I have never had so many men aggressively hitting on me as they did during the time period after DD was weaned and I had a buzzcut. Yup, post baby body and very short hair...obviously I needed an extra man in my life.
Like a fish needs a bicycle. >:D
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit.  The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

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Eastsider

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24392 on: November 15, 2013, 03:20:15 PM »
I just recently cut my hair short.  My husband is going to be so disappointed.

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24393 on: November 15, 2013, 03:20:33 PM »
Second, of course it's because she had short hair. Only lesbians have short hair. Cutting your hair short automatically makes you a lesbian. Jennifer Lawerence just cut her hair....welcome to the team  >:D.
Of course this is true.  Because we all know that no man will allow his woman to cut her hair short*.  Therefore, by the process of elimination, if she has short hair, she must not have a man, so she must be lesbian.



* I know it's not just me 'cuz I've heard other women say that when they cut their hair short, people ask them "Did your BF/DH let you cut your hair?"
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit.  The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

Marcus Aurelius

Slartibartfast

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24394 on: November 15, 2013, 03:42:55 PM »
I cut my hair from past-waist-length to less than an inch long a few years ago.  I didn't tell DH ahead of time.  He very wisely didn't say anything until I asked him directly, at which point he told me I looked "one part sexy, one part lesbian, and one part soccer mom."  I told him I was happy with two assumptions out of the three (no kids in soccer yet) and he never said anything more about it.

(I'm growing it out again, but mostly because short hair was a lot more work than long!)

LadyClaire

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24395 on: November 15, 2013, 03:49:28 PM »
Second, of course it's because she had short hair. Only lesbians have short hair. Cutting your hair short automatically makes you a lesbian. Jennifer Lawerence just cut her hair....welcome to the team  >:D.
Of course this is true.  Because we all know that no man will allow his woman to cut her hair short*.  Therefore, by the process of elimination, if she has short hair, she must not have a man, so she must be lesbian.



* I know it's not just me 'cuz I've heard other women say that when they cut their hair short, people ask them "Did your BF/DH let you cut your hair?"

I always find that amusing. My husband much prefers short hair on women. People act like he's some sort of weirdo when I tell them that.

Hillia

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24396 on: November 15, 2013, 04:05:07 PM »
My husband is the same way, he much prefers me in short hair.  Since I don't have strong feelings about it one way or the other, why not cut it short to please him?

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cwm

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24397 on: November 15, 2013, 04:13:23 PM »
Well, I've found out the real reason my parents got divorced. My mom's had short hair for decades. All this time and I never knew...

jedikaiti

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24398 on: November 15, 2013, 04:29:25 PM »
As amused as I am, I fear we may be straying too far from the topic at hand.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

goldilocks

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24399 on: November 15, 2013, 05:11:18 PM »
A very annoying SS waitress at a restaurant today. She kept trying to bait customers in the most random ways, so that she could share "I have a (specific model) motorcycle. I race. It's parked out back." Seriously, every.single.table. She actually trotted over to some frat boys and asked "My friends and I are having a debate. What do you consider manly to be ?....Yeah, beards are manly, I agree. I don't have one, but I ride motorcycles. I guess that makes me a dude without a beard lol I race them. Mine is parked out back. (cue long story about the waitress' boyfriend and her motorcycle hobby)." It was like that episode of the Big Bang Theory where Howard kept bringing up "I went to space." The bike she had actually wasn't that impressive. Evil me was tempted to leave a note on the seat saying "lol @ you bragging about this piece of junk. Lame. I've seen cooler tricycles"  >:D

Something similar happened to me recently.   

Background:  I live in a part of the US where lots of women hunt.   Usually with their husbands or fathers, but nonetheless are just as much into it.   So it's not a novelty.

I was at a party and in one of the rooms we were playing a video game with shooting ducks.   You basically pointed the gun at the TV and tried to shoot the ducks before they all flew off.   A woman I did not know walked in and watched.   When the round finished, one of the players politely offered her their spot.  Her reply "I dont' play silly games.  I hunt REAL ducks!!"   

she said this several times throughout the evening, as if her being a duck hunter should have been some big deal.

Shalamar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24400 on: November 15, 2013, 05:51:21 PM »
Gasp!  Ron Swanson has a sister!   :)

Jocelyn

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24401 on: November 15, 2013, 07:01:53 PM »
I had a friend who went for a haircut, and the stylist WAY overdid it. It was Marine (male Marine) short. My friend cried, but what can you do?
At work someone said, 'So, what's up with the haircut? You coming out of the closet?'
She gave him a look that Mr. Spock would have favored, and replied, 'The chemo did it.'

Hillia

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24402 on: November 15, 2013, 07:42:55 PM »
I had a friend who went for a haircut, and the stylist WAY overdid it. It was Marine (male Marine) short. My friend cried, but what can you do?
At work someone said, 'So, what's up with the haircut? You coming out of the closet?'
She gave him a look that Mr. Spock would have favored, and replied, 'The chemo did it.'

That's beautiful.  I had a friend who had a huge scar on her back from cancer surgery.  It showed when she wore a sundress (pretty common in Phoenix), and people would gasp and ask her what happened.  Her favorite answer: "Knife fight  in prison".

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Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24403 on: November 15, 2013, 08:09:32 PM »
A waitress and former marine was refused a tip on religious grounds.

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/new-jersey-waitress-dayne-morales-denied-tip-because-of-gay-lifestyle/story-fnixwvgh-1226760859617

Don't these people realize that acting rude in this way doesn't help or convince anyone? I don't think religion us enough of an excuse to be rude. And it's not the first time it happened.


How would they even know if she was g@y or not? Just because she had short hair? *SMH* And how does that have anything to do with her waiting on them... if she was g@y did it make her slower or something?

First, yes, all homosexuals (but especially lesbians) are just terrible at waiting tables. Very slow and unhelpful. All of us. Second, of course it's because she had short hair. Only lesbians have short hair. Cutting your hair short automatically makes you a lesbian. Jennifer Lawerence just cut her hair....welcome to the team  >:D.

So that's how you prepare!!! ;)

Right before my 7th grade year, my mother talked me into getting my hair cut short, and I hated it almost as soon as we walked out of the salon.  I hated it all the more when kids started teasing me about being a lesbian because of the haircut and never having a boyfriend till that point.  ::)
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Morrigan

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24404 on: November 15, 2013, 08:59:23 PM »
Can we please get back to Special Snowflake stories please?