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Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 6429787 times)

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LadyClaire

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24390 on: November 15, 2013, 03:49:28 PM »
Second, of course it's because she had short hair. Only lesbians have short hair. Cutting your hair short automatically makes you a lesbian. Jennifer Lawerence just cut her hair....welcome to the team  >:D.
Of course this is true.  Because we all know that no man will allow his woman to cut her hair short*.  Therefore, by the process of elimination, if she has short hair, she must not have a man, so she must be lesbian.



* I know it's not just me 'cuz I've heard other women say that when they cut their hair short, people ask them "Did your BF/DH let you cut your hair?"

I always find that amusing. My husband much prefers short hair on women. People act like he's some sort of weirdo when I tell them that.

Hillia

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24391 on: November 15, 2013, 04:05:07 PM »
My husband is the same way, he much prefers me in short hair.  Since I don't have strong feelings about it one way or the other, why not cut it short to please him?

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cwm

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24392 on: November 15, 2013, 04:13:23 PM »
Well, I've found out the real reason my parents got divorced. My mom's had short hair for decades. All this time and I never knew...

jedikaiti

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24393 on: November 15, 2013, 04:29:25 PM »
As amused as I am, I fear we may be straying too far from the topic at hand.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

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goldilocks

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24394 on: November 15, 2013, 05:11:18 PM »
A very annoying SS waitress at a restaurant today. She kept trying to bait customers in the most random ways, so that she could share "I have a (specific model) motorcycle. I race. It's parked out back." Seriously, every.single.table. She actually trotted over to some frat boys and asked "My friends and I are having a debate. What do you consider manly to be ?....Yeah, beards are manly, I agree. I don't have one, but I ride motorcycles. I guess that makes me a dude without a beard lol I race them. Mine is parked out back. (cue long story about the waitress' boyfriend and her motorcycle hobby)." It was like that episode of the Big Bang Theory where Howard kept bringing up "I went to space." The bike she had actually wasn't that impressive. Evil me was tempted to leave a note on the seat saying "lol @ you bragging about this piece of junk. Lame. I've seen cooler tricycles"  >:D

Something similar happened to me recently.   

Background:  I live in a part of the US where lots of women hunt.   Usually with their husbands or fathers, but nonetheless are just as much into it.   So it's not a novelty.

I was at a party and in one of the rooms we were playing a video game with shooting ducks.   You basically pointed the gun at the TV and tried to shoot the ducks before they all flew off.   A woman I did not know walked in and watched.   When the round finished, one of the players politely offered her their spot.  Her reply "I dont' play silly games.  I hunt REAL ducks!!"   

she said this several times throughout the evening, as if her being a duck hunter should have been some big deal.

Shalamar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24395 on: November 15, 2013, 05:51:21 PM »
Gasp!  Ron Swanson has a sister!   :)

Jocelyn

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24396 on: November 15, 2013, 07:01:53 PM »
I had a friend who went for a haircut, and the stylist WAY overdid it. It was Marine (male Marine) short. My friend cried, but what can you do?
At work someone said, 'So, what's up with the haircut? You coming out of the closet?'
She gave him a look that Mr. Spock would have favored, and replied, 'The chemo did it.'

Hillia

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24397 on: November 15, 2013, 07:42:55 PM »
I had a friend who went for a haircut, and the stylist WAY overdid it. It was Marine (male Marine) short. My friend cried, but what can you do?
At work someone said, 'So, what's up with the haircut? You coming out of the closet?'
She gave him a look that Mr. Spock would have favored, and replied, 'The chemo did it.'

That's beautiful.  I had a friend who had a huge scar on her back from cancer surgery.  It showed when she wore a sundress (pretty common in Phoenix), and people would gasp and ask her what happened.  Her favorite answer: "Knife fight  in prison".

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Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24398 on: November 15, 2013, 08:09:32 PM »
A waitress and former marine was refused a tip on religious grounds.

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/real-life/new-jersey-waitress-dayne-morales-denied-tip-because-of-gay-lifestyle/story-fnixwvgh-1226760859617

Don't these people realize that acting rude in this way doesn't help or convince anyone? I don't think religion us enough of an excuse to be rude. And it's not the first time it happened.


How would they even know if she was g@y or not? Just because she had short hair? *SMH* And how does that have anything to do with her waiting on them... if she was g@y did it make her slower or something?

First, yes, all homosexuals (but especially lesbians) are just terrible at waiting tables. Very slow and unhelpful. All of us. Second, of course it's because she had short hair. Only lesbians have short hair. Cutting your hair short automatically makes you a lesbian. Jennifer Lawerence just cut her hair....welcome to the team  >:D.

So that's how you prepare!!! ;)

Right before my 7th grade year, my mother talked me into getting my hair cut short, and I hated it almost as soon as we walked out of the salon.  I hated it all the more when kids started teasing me about being a lesbian because of the haircut and never having a boyfriend till that point.  ::)
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Morrigan

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24399 on: November 15, 2013, 08:59:23 PM »
Can we please get back to Special Snowflake stories please?

magician5

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24400 on: November 15, 2013, 09:40:59 PM »
Speaking of a different gender and a different day, I am old enough to remember the Beatles' first visit to the U.S.

You never heard so many comments like "Are they boys or are they girruls? Hyuk!" - Inside of a year, the American-kid hair-length battle was in its full heat. Redneck buzz cuts vs "those four lovable mop-tops from Liverpool." When the shouting was over, nobody doubted the Beatles' preferences (after so many "he slept with her and then her" articles) and it wouldn't be long before those of a certain class were wearing mullets and those incredibly stupid rat-tails.
« Last Edit: November 15, 2013, 09:46:39 PM by magician5 »
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PeterM

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24401 on: November 15, 2013, 10:02:33 PM »
Her reply "I dont' play silly games.  I hunt REAL ducks!!"   

she said this several times throughout the evening, as if her being a duck hunter should have been some big deal.

Does she hunt them by jumping out of a plane with nothing but a parachute on her back, a knife in her teeth and black murder in her heart, refusing to open the chute until she's bagged herself a duck in hand to hand combat? If that's not how she does it, I'm not very impressed.

Slartibartfast

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24402 on: November 16, 2013, 01:26:29 AM »
Speaking of a different gender and a different day, I am old enough to remember the Beatles' first visit to the U.S.

You never heard so many comments like "Are they boys or are they girruls? Hyuk!" - Inside of a year, the American-kid hair-length battle was in its full heat. Redneck buzz cuts vs "those four lovable mop-tops from Liverpool." When the shouting was over, nobody doubted the Beatles' preferences (after so many "he slept with her and then her" articles) and it wouldn't be long before those of a certain class were wearing mullets and those incredibly stupid rat-tails.

DH and I watched Terminator 2 again last night.  I was glad to see they weren't overly burdened by plot . . . or physics . . . but lordy, that 80's hair!  There are some pretty spectacular mullets in that movie!

Sirius

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24403 on: November 16, 2013, 02:56:22 AM »
I've never had long hair.  When my hair reaches a certain length it starts growing outward instead of down, and I look like I've hit a hot wire.  All it means is that I prefer my hair short. 

I haven't encountered any really memorable Special Snowflakes in awhile.  I hope that doesn't mean I'm about to be buried by a blizzard.

BB-VA

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #24404 on: November 16, 2013, 02:29:00 PM »
Speaking of a different gender and a different day, I am old enough to remember the Beatles' first visit to the U.S.

You never heard so many comments like "Are they boys or are they girruls? Hyuk!" - Inside of a year, the American-kid hair-length battle was in its full heat. Redneck buzz cuts vs "those four lovable mop-tops from Liverpool." When the shouting was over, nobody doubted the Beatles' preferences (after so many "he slept with her and then her" articles) and it wouldn't be long before those of a certain class were wearing mullets and those incredibly stupid rat-tails.

My Mama's comment on their first appearance on the Sullivan show:  "They'd be right nice looking  boys if they would just cut their hair."

A young friend, looking at my HS Yearbook for 1968 in the late 1970's, asked if the football team was required to keep their hair that short.  The football team that year had hair longer than the 1964 Beatles.
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