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Author Topic: Special Snowflake Stories  (Read 6179203 times)

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wonderfullyanonymous

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25080 on: January 16, 2014, 11:24:34 AM »
I'm going to start the sister company... RENT A FAMILY MEMBER

Are you afraid your not so favorite Aunt Janice is going to bring up your embarrassing accident at the park because the restrooms were locked. She has told you she will. Never fear, we can match, almost perfectly with our "Aunt Janice." She will proudly announce how you were her favorite niece, and how perfect you were as a child. Your wedding video will be PERFECT!!!


We can also fill in for your relatives who are "just going to get drunk." We have professional dancers on staff too, they can swoop in and cover for any guest who is flailing around like a fish out of water.

You want to be able to invite kids, but Aunt Denise and Uncle Dennis are bringing their kids up with no discipline, don't worry, we have hired kids to step in. Of course, they can't be out late, so a quick switch on the way in, can be a quick switch on the way out, as the children politely bid good night. Aunt and Uncle will be none the wiser, as they can't see the misbehavior of their children anyway.

Thipu1

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25081 on: January 16, 2014, 12:02:35 PM »
Actually, something like this happened.

In the early days of our neighborhood Halloween parade, adults were only allowed to participate if they were accompanied by a child.  It was not unusual for parents with several children to 'loan' out an older kid to a group of trusted, single friends for the event.   

cass2591

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25082 on: January 16, 2014, 02:12:31 PM »
You said the Middle school is 8 houses down. Nell and her Husband should do some research - how close to a school is an offender allowed to live in your state?

I don't know offhand, Nell's going to look into it.

Since I locked the thread that this post refers to, I think it would behoove everyone to let it go. If someone wants to contact the OP and she accepts PMs, feel free, but not here.
There is no pie in Nighthawks, which is why it's such a desolate image. ~ Happy Stomach

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened. ~ Mark Twain

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TootsNYC

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25083 on: January 16, 2014, 02:54:40 PM »
Regarding the escalator - I live on an island with no escalators.  I must admit to stopping at the top of the one in the Miami airport.  It had been 20 years since I had seen one and honestly had to take a minute to remember how to get on one.  Silly I know but it seemed so foreign.

Stopping at the top of a down elevator before you get on is fine.

It's the stopping when you get off--because the people behind you can't slow down.

crella

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25084 on: January 16, 2014, 05:15:33 PM »
I'm going to start the sister company... RENT A FAMILY MEMBER


It was a fad here in Japan for a while...

http://worldchannel.org/programs/episode/rent-family-inc/

Bluenomi

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25085 on: January 16, 2014, 05:56:50 PM »
When I got married, I cheated. I had no bridesmaids at all. I had Ex's nephew as ring bearer and my niece as flower girl. I didnt want to have to choose between my friends, and I flat out didnt want the drama that bridesmaids can bring. Plus I was cheap.  ;D

I had my skinnier cousin but she was 8 months pregnant at the time is that fixed that!

Jocelyn

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25086 on: January 16, 2014, 08:54:22 PM »
I had a friend  who had a very unfortunate facial condition. It was obviously the first thing you noticed about her, and she knew that being called a beautiful bride just wasn't in the cards for her. Even more unfortunate was that she had a cousin who was extraordinarily beautiful. As children, my friend had had to listen to family members talking about how pretty her cousin was. When she announced her engagement, her mother and aunts absolutely insisted that there was no way that she could choose anyone other than her cousin as her MOH. My friend said that she could not bear to listen to all her relatives talking about how beautiful Cousin was at her wedding, and she knew, from decades of experience, that they would say this to her face, and would pressure her to agree with them that Cousin was such a great beauty, while no one would comment about what a pretty bride she was. So when it came time to choose the bridesmaid dresses, she chose a color and a style that would be the least flattering to Cousin. Her bridesmaids had different figures and coloring from Cousin and the dresses were reasonably flattering to them.

gramma dishes

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25087 on: January 16, 2014, 09:17:26 PM »
^^^  Wouldn't it have just been easier not to have her cousin as part of the wedding party? ???

Iris

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25088 on: January 16, 2014, 09:59:25 PM »
^^^  Wouldn't it have just been easier not to have her cousin as part of the wedding party? ???

I'd think about leaving the mother and aunts out as well. Sheesh.
"Can't do anything with children, can you?" the woman said.

Poirot thought you could, but forebore to say so.

WolfWay

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25089 on: January 17, 2014, 05:22:42 AM »
My mum is being a PA snowflake it seems (not that this is a news flash to me, but this time its very underhanded).

I share a house with my parents (it's my house, they are retired and live with me). I have repeatedly told my mum I don't like those plug-in mosquito vapour thingies. Maybe I'm being a snowflake myself about this, but I don't know what's in them, but I don't want to be breathing in unknown repellant chemicals for hours on end.

I had to drive home in the middle of the morning today because I had a warddrobe malfunction at work (my trouser button wasn't as firmly sewn on as I had hoped and it popped off). My parents are out and I dive into my room to change and notice that there is one of those mosquito repellant thingies plugged into the plug in my room.

Which means that my mum (knowing I really don't like those things), waits until I go to work, plugs one in and leaves it in all day and then unplugs it before I come home. Which means I've been breathing in those repellant chemicals I don't like while I sleep at nights. Thanks mum, thanks a bunch.
It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian Tiger - from a distance, preferably separated by bars . -- Pearls Before Swine (16-May-2009)

BB-VA

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25090 on: January 17, 2014, 06:38:10 AM »
^^^  Wouldn't it have just been easier not to have her cousin as part of the wedding party? ???

I'd think about leaving the mother and aunts out as well. Sheesh.

Eloping also comes to mind.
"The Universe puts us in places where we can learn. They are never easy places, but they are right. Wherever we are, it's the right place and the right time. Pain that sometimes comes is part of the process of constantly being born."
- Delenn to Sheridan: "Babylon 5 - Distant Star"

Piratelvr1121

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25091 on: January 17, 2014, 07:32:57 AM »
My mum is being a PA snowflake it seems (not that this is a news flash to me, but this time its very underhanded).

I share a house with my parents (it's my house, they are retired and live with me). I have repeatedly told my mum I don't like those plug-in mosquito vapour thingies. Maybe I'm being a snowflake myself about this, but I don't know what's in them, but I don't want to be breathing in unknown repellant chemicals for hours on end.

I had to drive home in the middle of the morning today because I had a warddrobe malfunction at work (my trouser button wasn't as firmly sewn on as I had hoped and it popped off). My parents are out and I dive into my room to change and notice that there is one of those mosquito repellant thingies plugged into the plug in my room.

Which means that my mum (knowing I really don't like those things), waits until I go to work, plugs one in and leaves it in all day and then unplugs it before I come home. Which means I've been breathing in those repellant chemicals I don't like while I sleep at nights. Thanks mum, thanks a bunch.

Wow, that would tick me off too and would have me contemplating a lock on my door and taking the only key to work with me!
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

MissRose

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25092 on: January 17, 2014, 07:58:14 AM »
This morning the SS's are coming out with the snow covered roads including: the person who turned out a bit fast and nearly hit my car on the driver's side and came within a few feet of doing so, plus he gets bonus SS points for have most of his car windows covered in snow.

Then my mother calls me, mentions an issue with the copier/printer and that I should come look at it after work.  I am not a printer expert at all.  Perhaps I should say I get an on call fee of $40 an hour for calling me as I am walking into the office where I actually get paid to do tech support of a different nature.

Runningstar

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25093 on: January 17, 2014, 08:10:14 AM »
My mum is being a PA snowflake it seems (not that this is a news flash to me, but this time its very underhanded).

I share a house with my parents (it's my house, they are retired and live with me). I have repeatedly told my mum I don't like those plug-in mosquito vapour thingies. Maybe I'm being a snowflake myself about this, but I don't know what's in them, but I don't want to be breathing in unknown repellant chemicals for hours on end.

I had to drive home in the middle of the morning today because I had a warddrobe malfunction at work (my trouser button wasn't as firmly sewn on as I had hoped and it popped off). My parents are out and I dive into my room to change and notice that there is one of those mosquito repellant thingies plugged into the plug in my room.

Which means that my mum (knowing I really don't like those things), waits until I go to work, plugs one in and leaves it in all day and then unplugs it before I come home. Which means I've been breathing in those repellant chemicals I don't like while I sleep at nights. Thanks mum, thanks a bunch.
Oh boy.  That is very similar to my own mom.  Of course you wouldn't want insecticide (probably citronella type) in your room.  I get terrible headaches from things like that.  I'd be sure to address this with her and I might even go to the lock idea.  Things like this make me angry, because this type of game is not harmless necessarily and also causes further mistrust. 

Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Special Snowflake Stories
« Reply #25094 on: January 17, 2014, 08:32:15 AM »
My mum is being a PA snowflake it seems (not that this is a news flash to me, but this time its very underhanded).

I share a house with my parents (it's my house, they are retired and live with me). I have repeatedly told my mum I don't like those plug-in mosquito vapour thingies. Maybe I'm being a snowflake myself about this, but I don't know what's in them, but I don't want to be breathing in unknown repellant chemicals for hours on end.

I had to drive home in the middle of the morning today because I had a warddrobe malfunction at work (my trouser button wasn't as firmly sewn on as I had hoped and it popped off). My parents are out and I dive into my room to change and notice that there is one of those mosquito repellant thingies plugged into the plug in my room.

Which means that my mum (knowing I really don't like those things), waits until I go to work, plugs one in and leaves it in all day and then unplugs it before I come home. Which means I've been breathing in those repellant chemicals I don't like while I sleep at nights. Thanks mum, thanks a bunch.
Oh boy.  That is very similar to my own mom.  Of course you wouldn't want insecticide (probably citronella type) in your room.  I get terrible headaches from things like that.  I'd be sure to address this with her and I might even go to the lock idea.  Things like this make me angry, because this type of game is not harmless necessarily and also causes further mistrust.

It's things like this that would make me sure that I cooked my own food, did my own laundry, and basically cut them out of any of the social "taking care of each other" things that makes, y'know, a FAMILY.  I don't give my trust as easily once it's been abused.  To be honest, it would (for me) come down to two choices: treat them cordially but at a slight distance (like a roommate), or ask them to leave, because the thought would always be there of just what they would do to me that I specifically told them I didn't want done to me.
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