Author Topic: Child etiquette  (Read 11956 times)

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caslyn

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Child etiquette
« on: March 02, 2009, 08:38:01 AM »
If you see a child behaving badly in a public area, alert the child's parents or a staff member to deal with the situation.

If a child is about to get hurt/hurt someone or something else, then take steps to prevent injury (can I get more vague?!), but don't expect thanks (unfortunatly from what I read on this and other sites. Personally, you save my child from injury then I'm forever in your debt)

If you are teaching your child about "real world experiences" do so at a time and in a manner that will not inconvenience others.

Try and enforce appropriate behaviour in your child - i.e. there is a time and a place for running and outdoor voices

Am sure I'll think of more, but lunch is calling!

ETA - This is intended as a general child/adult interaction topic - obviously other topics might have some child specific guidelines!
« Last Edit: March 02, 2009, 08:40:19 AM by caslyn »

snowball's chance

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #1 on: March 02, 2009, 03:15:46 PM »
Don't force a child to give you a hug or kiss, even if the child is your godchild, grandchild, niece or nephew.  It sends a message that a child isn't allowed to refuse to be touched.  Even if you are the Auntie, to a 3-yr-old who sees you twice a year, you are a stranger for all intents & purposes.  The more time you spend with him or her, the child will warm up to you and feel more comfortable hugging you.

Black Delphinium

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #2 on: March 02, 2009, 03:34:04 PM »
If you see a child behaving badly in a public area, alert the child's parents or a staff member to deal with the situation.
Conversely, if you see a child behaving very well in public, try and say something nice to the parents/adults with said child if you feel it is appropriate. Good behavior should be encouraged!
When angels go bad, they go worse than anyone. Remember, Lucifer was an angel. ~The Marquis De Carabas

caslyn

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #3 on: March 02, 2009, 03:34:25 PM »
Oooh that's a good one.

ETA I was replying to Snowball, but my answer stands for both posts!  ;D

Lisbeth

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #4 on: March 02, 2009, 06:53:09 PM »
Discipline your own child in private and not by scolding him/her or using corporal punishment in public.
« Last Edit: March 02, 2009, 07:22:42 PM by KeenReader »
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caslyn

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #5 on: March 03, 2009, 04:26:01 AM »
Discipline your own child in private and not by scolding him/her or using corporal punishment in public.

Yes - I was trying to phrase one around the idea that parenting/disciplining your child should not inconvenience/make others feel uncomfortable. Along the lines of yes, ignoring a temper tantrum is considered by many to be the best long term way to deal with it, but in the short term a screaming child in a supermarket queue is not pleasant for others around.

momof2bratz

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #6 on: March 03, 2009, 06:03:27 AM »
Remember that children learn by example, so keep your own behaviour and manners in check to set the right example for children.

snowball's chance

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #7 on: March 03, 2009, 08:53:14 AM »
When your young starts fussing, crying or misbehaving in public, please remove them from the situation until they settle down.

snowball's chance

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #8 on: March 03, 2009, 09:01:12 AM »
You know your own children best -- if you know they get crabby after a long shopping trip or at naptime, or you have trouble watching all of them while shopping, do others a favor and leave your one, some or all of your kids at home with an adult if this is an option for you. 

mechtilde

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #9 on: March 03, 2009, 09:05:21 AM »
Discipline your own child in private and not by scolding him/her or using corporal punishment in public.

The only problem with that is that young children need to be disciplined immediately if they do something wrong and if there is a delay between misbehaviour and whatever consequences have been decided upon by the parent the child will not understand why they are being punished. Whilst in principle I agree that the child should be disciplined privately, in practice that is not always possible.

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FoxPaws

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #10 on: March 03, 2009, 09:28:36 AM »
Remember that all venues, events, establishments, occasions, and people are not child friendly. Check first to make sure that children will be welcomed and accommodated before taking them somewhere new. If you do not go anywhere without your children, adjust your dining/shopping/entertainment/travelling habits accordingly.

Be honest with yourselves about how well your children actually can/will behave and whether or not their personal best is going to be acceptable for a particular occasion. (e.g. "good for a six year old" behavior may be fine for a 45 minute church service, but not for a two hour formal wedding mass.)

Do not use, "I have a cchhiillyyuulllddd!!" as a means to get special treatment, have rules waived, cut to the front of the line, take more than your share, shirk responsibility, etc. Save the "kid card" for true emergencies - which should be very few and far between.
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Hawkwatcher

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #11 on: March 03, 2009, 10:56:11 AM »

Do not use, "I have a cchhiillyyuulllddd!!" as a means to get special treatment, have rules waived, cut to the front of the line, take more than your share, shirk responsibility, etc. Save the "kid card" for true emergencies - which should be very few and far between.

Employers and others should not reward such behavior by giving parents special treatment compared to childless and child free employees.  For example, parents should not always get favorable hours at the expense of other employees.

I would also like to add that parents should remember that their children are individuals with their own interests and abilities.  Although Mom or Dad may have been a great soccer player, math student, or singer, it does not mean that the child will share the same abilities or skills.  Parents should have realistic expectations and not yell at their children, teachers or coaches if their children are not the best at an activity or subject.

For example, I had a friend who used to coach a child's baseball team.  He found that the children and most the parents were very polite.  Unfortunately, he had to deal with one father who would yell at his son if his team lost a game.  This child was 5 years old.   

   

MyFamily

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #12 on: March 03, 2009, 10:59:07 AM »
Discipline your own child in private and not by scolding him/her or using corporal punishment in public.

The only problem with that is that young children need to be disciplined immediately if they do something wrong and if there is a delay between misbehaviour and whatever consequences have been decided upon by the parent the child will not understand why they are being punished. Whilst in principle I agree that the child should be disciplined privately, in practice that is not always possible.

I agree with mechtilde - when my 3 year old daughter crossed an alley without me and without looking she was immediately disciplined.  She needed to know right then that what she did was wrong and very dangerous (cars don't always look and frankly, she may be tall for her age but she is still small).    And she's never repeated that mistake again, I should add and is very good about holding my hand when we cross an alley.


"The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones" - Solomon ibn Gabirol

snowball's chance

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #13 on: March 03, 2009, 11:26:38 AM »
Employers and others should not reward such behavior by giving parents special treatment compared to childless and child free employees.  For example, parents should not always get favorable hours at the expense of other employees.

ITA! 

caranfin

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Re: Child etiquette
« Reply #14 on: March 03, 2009, 01:48:56 PM »
Employers and others should not reward such behavior by giving parents special treatment compared to childless and child free employees.  For example, parents should not always get favorable hours at the expense of other employees.

ITA! 

Absolutely. And parents who do end up getting some slack should make up for it in other ways. If someone has to stay late, and you can't because you have to pick up your kids, then you should be first to volunteer to work through lunch.
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