Hostesses With The Mostest > Entertaining and Hospitality

House-warming party...10 years after move-in


I found this on Dear Abby's Saturday column.  Not only is the subject of the letter shocking, but Abby's answer as well.  Has anyone else heard of a "Happily Single Party" and think it's acceptable?

DEAR ABBY: Is it socially correct to have a housewarming party for someone who has lived in the home for more than 10 years? The party is scheduled to be held at a restaurant.
The idea for this party was the "honoree's" mother's because her daughter has never been married or had a child, and her mother thinks that the people she has given gifts to all these years owe her something back. (Kena:  ::))I have never heard of such a party, but others think it's a great idea. -- CONFUSED IN SPENCERPORT, N.Y.

DEAR CONFUSED: Although unusual, it's not unheard of. This kind of party is sometimes thrown for a "confirmed bachelorette." However, it is not referred to as a housewarming party. It's called a "happily single" shower, and the happy single registers at stores the same way a bride-to-be or expectant mother does.

Kena: Talk about entitlement!  It would be like somebody who's never had a form a cancer having a party to celebrate his/her survival.  If I was the honoree, I would be so embarrassed!  It would be like your family saying that they know without a doubt that you're never going to get married or have a child (and that not doing these things is a bad thing).  It would be especially rude if you had made no declaration to the contrary. Oy, Abby, for unconciously (God help us all if it's consciously) condoning this tacky custom!

If the honoree decided to throw a "happy being single" party, and it was her own idea, I think that would be fine.  As long as there's no mention of gifts, and no one else is expected to foot the bill, it sounds like a nice idea for a great party.  I can also see the parents thinking "well, she's not getting married, so may as well give her the money we would have spent on a wedding and have a fantastic party" (although I'm not at all in love with the idea of "only giving money to the kids when they get married" - but that's another story).

That being said, I think it would be terrible if the mother decided this and went ahead with the party.  Even if the daughter is a confirmed bachelorette, it should really be her decision if she wants to celebrate that fact. 

Of course, registering for gifts as a way to get paid back is beyond the pale (wasn't it in an episode of "Sex and the City"?).  Then again, I think it's a commentary on exchanging gifts in the U.S. today - people celebrate these milestones with big parties (fine) and mile-long registry lists (not fine).

Just a heads up - there's already a thread on this in the Life forum.  Y'all might want to check in there for some other responses to this letter. :)

NOVA Lady:

--- Quote from: Dottyg on April 16, 2007, 02:34:41 PM ---Just a heads up - there's already a thread on this in the Life forum.  Y'all might want to check in there for some other responses to this letter. :)

--- End quote ---

Some.... the understatement of the night!  >:D Sorry.... I will put the evil marina away :)


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