Author Topic: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs  (Read 5617 times)

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Animala

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Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« on: March 21, 2009, 09:03:09 PM »
This thread is for proper behavior for people who use canes/walkers/wheelchairs.  There is a sister thread for people around them here- http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=54149.0

~Your canes/walkers/wheelchairs is not a weapon please do not harass, assault or poke people with it.
~People like to help, please be gracious about it.
~Please do not lend non-handicap people you handicap parking placards.
~Having a mobility issue does not make you a special snowflake.

FoxPaws

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2009, 09:28:42 PM »
- Be specific when asking for assistance. Instead of, "Help me into the car," say, "Please prop the door open and hold my purse while I maneuver in, and then put my walker in the back seat." Even if the person assisting you is a professional caregiver, they don't know what help you need unless you tell them.
I am so a lady. And if you say I'm not, I'll slug you. - Cindy Brady

camlan

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #2 on: March 25, 2009, 09:18:47 AM »
People who use wheelchairs should look behind them before they back up.

Oh, wait.

That's really for my nephew, who has backed his 200 pound power chair over my feet more times than I can count. Hopefully, as he gets older, he'll remember to do this more often. 
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


ladyonwheels

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #3 on: July 13, 2009, 05:59:34 PM »
another rule to add: despite it being a courtesy for people to allow a disabled person to the front of a line, do not expect it every time and don't throw a fit when it doesn't.


careful, i like bare toes ;D

Harriet Jones

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2009, 06:10:05 PM »
People who use wheelchairs should look behind them before they back up.

Oh, wait.

That's really for my nephew, who has backed his 200 pound power chair over my feet more times than I can count. Hopefully, as he gets older, he'll remember to do this more often. 

It's not just your nephew.  There was a fellow student at my college who'd always be running over people in the cafeteria with his scooter.

camlan

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2009, 12:17:14 PM »
People who use wheelchairs should look behind them before they back up.

Oh, wait.

That's really for my nephew, who has backed his 200 pound power chair over my feet more times than I can count. Hopefully, as he gets older, he'll remember to do this more often. 

It's not just your nephew.  There was a fellow student at my college who'd always be running over people in the cafeteria with his scooter.

Oh, dear, that's not good. At least my nephew has the excuse of being 10 years old and just not thinking once in a while. My brother has tried mounting a rearview mirror on one arm of the chair, but it mysteriously keeps falling off.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


NOVA Lady

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2009, 12:25:24 PM »
If you need assistance *ask* do not demand or come to expect everyone to help you. It is nice for others to assist you, but sometimes they cannot or do not wish to. They are doing you a kindness, they are not obligated to assist. (unless they are a caretaker and ARE obligated to assist).

This after some annoying experiences in the grocery store and some folks who instead of asking demand. I was once snarled at in the pet aisle after being poked with a cane to get my attention. I wasn't inclined to assist someone who made such a rude request (I need that cat litter, get it for me.... is not a question) and even if I wanted to help, I have some physical issues (that one cannot see) at the moment and cannot lift something that heavy from the ground to a cart.

I am sure that woman thought I was the height of rude when I refused and offered to find her a store employee. She just kept snarly... get me the litter!! and pointing with her cane.

penguinpants

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #7 on: August 08, 2009, 07:57:52 AM »
* Do not use your wheelchair to harass people with canes.  They are not "faking," nor are you higher up on some sort of disability hierarchy.

(this happened to me a few times -- the person doing it made no small bones about the fact that their disability was more "authentic," since they'd been born with it, and those who had accidents or illness later on in life didn't count as truly disabled.)

* Do not passively aggressively refuse to acknowledge a person who asks you kindly to move your scooter so that they can pass through a narrow hallway.

(one young woman made a regular production of this, using her chair to park diagonally in a hallway that provided the only access to a set of classrooms -- when she finally did acknowledge the request, she'd throw a nasty little tantrum)

* Do not drive down the yellow lane, or in any car or bicycle traffic lanes.  You do not get to hold up traffic for mile after mile.  Nor should you pop through the crossing when you have a red light or a stop sign to negotiate.  Nor do you get to pop in between parked cars on the street and fly out into traffic.

(a lot of people do this pretty regularly around here, and some poor woman hit one of the men when he flew out between parked cars, directly into the driving lane -- she had no time to stop, and continues to blame herself for his death)
Surprises are foolish things. The pleasure is not enhanced, and the inconvenience is often considerable. -- Jane Austen

sparksals

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #8 on: August 08, 2009, 12:17:58 PM »
On the other side of the coin, if you see someone with a cane or walker trying to go out a door, please don't crowd the door so that exiting is not impossible.

When I was still on a cane, the Y I go to only had one handicap entrance/exit with the auto push button door.  It happened to be the entrance.  There is a HUGE sticker on the door alerting everyone it is a handicap accessible door.  It never failed when I tried to exit, people would give ME dirty looks for going out the in door.  People would crowd the doors, not step aside or make room for me to pass. 

It happened everywhere.  I got huffs and puffs from people if I was walking too slowly so as not to slip on ice and they had to wait a few extra seconds to turn into their parking stall. 

So, if you see a disabled person using a walker or cane, please know they are not trying to slow you down.  Please use courtesy by letting them pass through the door.  There were a couple times I was nearly knocked over and was tempted to swing my cane at those people! ;)

kherbert05

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #9 on: August 08, 2009, 02:02:01 PM »
Just because your child has a physical disability does not mean s/he gets to disrupt school, curse at teachers, and bully students. If the bullying is s3xu@l and shows knowledge your child should not have CPS will get involved. Charges may be filed against your child if s/he is older than 10.

The other kids aren't being mean when they don't like your child after s/he has been slamming them into the wall. Our kids are SMART they know the difference between what people can and can not control.

1. Autistic child has a melt down because of sensory over load - they ignore sometimes covering their ears till principal, AP, councilor, or SPED teacher arrives to remove child from mainstream classroom. If something happens in the hallway - kids will go directly to someone allowed to physically move child to get help. We don't hear word one from other parents complaining. Kids don't complain. (Meltdowns are rare once the structure and rhythm of school is established and we minimize triggers the best we can. Can't do much about Houston Thunderstorms though)

2. Kid who is not autistic pulls similar stunt. People allowed to remove child from classroom* show up in the same amount of time. We hear complaints for students and parents. They are right it isn't right for this child to hold other people's learning hostage to his/her whims.

*Teachers can order child to leave and escort child who will walk to office. If they throw themselves on the ground or refuse to move we can't legally touch them unless we take special classes about moving kids so they can't be hurt. I don't want the added liability so I not taking the class. You put that call out on the intercom you get someone running to your classroom asap.
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VorFemme

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #10 on: August 09, 2009, 02:50:52 PM »
Not to mention that an autistic child in meltdown mode could NOT tell you that they had eaten peanut butter for lunch (or even breakfast) and then there could be two emergencies to deal with.

Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

Moonie

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #11 on: September 05, 2009, 06:25:54 PM »
~Please do not lend non-handicap people you handicap park

ing placards


You may do this, however if the person is providing YOU the transportation. 

magician5

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #12 on: September 20, 2009, 07:34:49 AM »
So, if you see a disabled person using a walker or cane, please know they are not trying to slow you down.

As a walker-user, I'm very uncomfortable being in the way of people behind me. I've never had people grump at me for that ... but I'm always stepping aside a bit and saying with a smile "please go ahead, I'm slow." That lets them go on, and lets me hobble on taking my own time.

I don't know where all these reported rude able-bodied people come from ... everyone is always so nice to me. It may be that I intimidate people just by my height and air of intensity or something ... maybe I look like, despite the walker, if you annoy me too much I will eat you for breakfast and ask for more. Which is indeed the case.
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.

sparksals

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #13 on: September 20, 2009, 12:36:21 PM »
So, if you see a disabled person using a walker or cane, please know they are not trying to slow you down.

As a walker-user, I'm very uncomfortable being in the way of people behind me. I've never had people grump at me for that ... but I'm always stepping aside a bit and saying with a smile "please go ahead, I'm slow." That lets them go on, and lets me hobble on taking my own time.

I don't know where all these reported rude able-bodied people come from ... everyone is always so nice to me. It may be that I intimidate people just by my height and air of intensity or something ... maybe I look like, despite the walker, if you annoy me too much I will eat you for breakfast and ask for more. Which is indeed the case.

Since I was temporarily disabled, maybe I noticed it more.  Are you implying I'm not telling the truth?  Your last paragraph sounds like that to me. 


magician5

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Re: Everyday: How to behave with canes, walkers and wheelchairs
« Reply #14 on: September 20, 2009, 08:51:16 PM »
Are you implying I'm not telling the truth?  Your last paragraph sounds like that to me. 

Oooh, touchy! Of course I'm not implying that ... your experience is your experience. I'm just saying that it's never happened to me even once. That doesn't mean it hasn't happened to you. Maybe because (I'm assuming here) you're not a man, 6-feet-1, 350 pounds, who has been known to silence rude comments just by standing up straight and arching an eyebrow.
There is no 'way to peace.' Peace is the way.