Day Care Chicken Pox Etiquette

[jfulle5]

So here is the story:
-Two weeks (two Saturdays) ago I took my daughter to a holiday in the park celebration and even though it was very cold there were mosquitoes out and about. The next morning she had about 5 bites on her face. She is highly allergic to the little bugs and typically I put bug repellent on her but it was so cold I didn't think they were out. She also had a few marks on her arms but again I didn't see any cause for alarm because she had been playing outdoors the previous day with just a long sleeve shirt on. Anyway no new marks really showed up the following week and she went to daycare as normal. Her teacher knows of her allergy and she checked them and she agreed they looked like bug bites. Well this past Monday I brought her to the doctor because they weren't getting any better, no new ones had shown up though, but I just wanted to get them checked.
-The doctor had never seen anything like it. She was 80% sure it was chicken pox though. My daughter had gotten the immunity shot at age one, she is now 2.5, and so the doctor though she had the mildest case she's ever seen. About 8 dots total. It didn't start on her torso which is what i here is common and she never had a fever. She's been quite pleasant and has not been fussy at all.
-Anyway I pulled her out of the daycare immediately and told her teach it "might" be chicken pox. The director of the daycare found out and sent an email to every parent in the entire center saying there was a "contagious disease" going around and that there child was exposed. Now I am getting blamed for infecting the entire daycare and they are threatening "action."
1)How is this my fault when the daycare even examined her spots and determined they were bits
2)What should I do with the parents that are confronting me about infecting their child.

no cases so far have been reported at the daycare.

[Maggie]

Honestly I would say I'm sorry but I thought they were bites.  Until I took her to the dr. and the dr said otherwise. 

Any child that is in daycare is susceptible to diseases.  I don't really think it is your fault.  You did what you and the daycare thought was right. 

[kareng57]

It really wouldn't have made much difference anyway.  Chicken-pox is most contagious before any spots appear - I think the peak-time is the day beforehand, when the child feels perfectly fine but is still exposing anyone else who comes near her.  I truly don't see what sort of action the daycare could take, in any event.

If the other kids have been vaccinated, they too would likely get very mild cases, if any.  Chicken pox can indeed be very serious in some kids, and that's the whole point of vaccination, after all.  I'd wager that this is all going to end up being much ado about nothing.

[Reika]

Sounds to me like the director overreacted a bit. Chicken pox isn't as serious as it used to be unless there's some sort of "superflu" strain going around that no one has reported in the news.

[Shoo]

They're threatening "action" are they?  Huh.

The director of your daycare, I hope you don't mind me saying, sounds like a dufus.  I'd be concerned about leaving my child at a daycare where the director doesn't realize that chicken pox are most contagious before the spots even show up.  And with such a mild case such as your dd's, even THEY didn't realize what they were.

Actionable, my caboose.

So, how about the next time your dd is exposed to the flu, one of the teachers comes down with a cold, pink eye is diagnosed in some baby, that you threaten THEM with some sort of "action?"

Better yet, find a better daycare.  How insulting of them to threaten you.  My feelings for them would never be the same, and I'd never feel comfortable with them again. 

[jfulle5]

This is the first time I've had a problem like this. The daycare is suppose to be the best around, it's a progressive learning center that is gearing the children to enter the magnet school that is associated with the university. Everyone in the wing my dd is in has had the chicken pox vaccine. It's a requirement. My whole point was it just chicken pox, they will get in eventually so what is the big deal? It's just frustrating.

[CrayonOutlines]

1)How is this my fault when the daycare even examined her spots and determined they were bits
2)What should I do with the parents that are confronting me about infecting their child.

Riiiiiiight.  Are these parents familiar with the fact that illnesses go through daycares like wildfire?  And that it's not only NOT uncommon, but to be expected?  If it's THAT important that their children not be exposed to viruses and bacteria, they shouldn't be in daycare.

As far as how to respond to other parents, I'd just say something like, "Oh, I'm sorry.  What do you suggest I do about it now?" as politely as humanly possible. 

[MelJill]

Chicken pox isn't as serious as it used to be

Chickenpox never was that serious a disease in the first place (except for immuno-compromised individuals, who probably should not be in a daycare setting anyhow due to the prevalence of 'whatever's going around' going around there, nor should those who live w/ the immuno-compromised be in a daycare) or in the case of adults contracting the disease.  It got built up into something hugely terrible to sell the vaccine, and I'll stop there.

And for the OP ... I think the director was waaaay out of line.  I'm not quite sure who's threatening "action" because of this, but I think I'd fix them with that coldly polite stare and wait for them to fish their feet from their mouths.

[stanthedevil]

This thread makes me laugh because when I was kid, my mom used to send us to play with the neighbor kids who had the chicken pox going through their household.  She wanted us to have them and get them out of the way since chicken pox tends to be worse the older you get.

[ClaireC79]

When chickenpox goes round my daughters school a letter never gets sent home - but it does for nits - of course I'm in the UK and it's not a routine vaccine here.  I think it got mentioned, but more in the yard when picking them up.

Eldest daughter caught it (from school - came out in spots day after school broke up for the summer) passed it on to her younger sister, spots came out 13 days later - younger son still had immunity from me, I was still breastfeding).  Summer term after younger daughter started about 2/3rds of her class was off with it.

Son starts school after Christmas - I'm guessing he'll catch it in May/June this year.

Does the letter specifically name your child or was a just a 'heads up, if your child comes out with some spots, it maybe chicken pox it's going round

[Lady Vavasour]

Chicken pox is far more severe in adults than in children. In the case of an ordinary, healthy child I would far prefer them to get it as a child than risk it as an adult.

[kisu]

Oh wow... chicken pox is just like the flu for healthy children! Actually, (according to my professor) it'd be best if all healthy individuals had it when they were daycare/kindergarten age, because the immunisation doesn't always work 100%, and because having chicken pox as an adult can really be dangerous. I think it's completely insane to threaten you with anything, because a) there's no way to tell if a child is coming down with chicken pox before the rash appears and b) chicken pox is hardly smallpox or the black death.

If the parents are afraid of their children getting chicken pox, they should get them immunised. If they choose not to do this, in my mind it's the same thing as accepting the fact that their child will, for a few weeks of their life, have a rash and possibly some low fever.

When I was a kid, if there was chicken pox in the neighbourhood, all the moms with kids who hadn't yet had chicken pox would send the kids to play with the chicken pox patient... DIY immunisation!

[Cyndi]

They're probably just irritated because their child will be sick over Christmas and ruin all plans they might have had regarding going out and stuff. I know little kids don't care about being sick, but it can be a pain dealing with a miserable, sick child over the holidays.

[sammycat]

I think the director has over reacted and also breached confidentiality if she has specifically mentioned your child by name in the letter. (Or maybe that is standard practice in your area/centre?).  You reacted appropriately by immediately removing your daughter from the centre so I'm not quite sure what else you were expected to do.  And it's highly likely that your daughter caught it from some other child in the centre anyway, so if other parents don't want their children exposed to these sorts of things they should never send their kids to daycare/school/extra curricular activities.

My son's grade 1 class had 3 separate cases of chicken pox this year, and in each case no one else caught it so the chances of other children contracting it from your daughter are probably very slim anyway.

[Clara Bow]

Oh please...when I was in second grade, during the dawn of the Plantagenet reign I infected the whole class, including a little boy with leukemia who nearly died and my two year old brother. No one threatened action! If those kids have had their immunizations there is no reason to fear that they will get chicken pox. And even if they do, so what?? How many colds has your little peach come home with that were the result of some twit bringing his/her kid to daycare sick as a dog? Has she gotten pink eye? Hello???
I think I would find a better daycare, and tell the director of your current daycare exactly why.
Incidentally, I got measles from a measles vaccination when I was a little girl. The doctor told my mother it was a one in a million case...your daughter has my sympathy, and a nice fat bottle of calamine.