When I was in high school, I was best friends with two girls, we'll call them "Star" and "Lynn." Star was killed by a drunk driver, leaving Lynn and me incredibly sad. A few years later, Lynn and her boyfriend, "Tom," decided to get married. Lynn called me up and asked me to be the MOH and only bridesmaid, as Star was no longer with us. I agreed, and was touched by her thoughtfulness, since I had just enrolled in college that year and had not had much time to talk to her. Lynn was as far from a Bridezilla as was possible, and I was more than happy to get a dress and plan a shower for her. Since I was in college, my mother graciously agreed to let me use her house for the shower. I tried to call Lynn's mother to see if she wanted to help or had any requests, but she never answered her phone, not even to RSVP to the shower.
The day of the shower came, and I cut sandwiches, mixed fruit salad, and made punch. My mom (who is a great person, and could plan a party in a hurricane if need be) helped with the decorations and food prep. Just as a finished slicing the fruit salad, I had to dash to the bathroom. I thought perhaps it was nerves that made me queasy, but I threw up, and felt much better. I told my mother that perhaps it might be better if I switched to decorations and she finished up the food prep from a health standpoint. At this point, everything becomes rather surreal to me, since it rapidly became obvious that I was suffering from some form of a stomach virus; every twenty minutes or so, I had to dash off to the bathroom. Now, I was for sure not going to bother Lynn with this, as it was her shower, but I cringed inside, knowing how odd it must look for the MOH to be continually excusing herself (a few times, during the recording of gifts.) Lynn was never anything less that composed, however, and the shower was more or less a success; in fact, many of her older relatives couldn't believe that I had planned it. The less part of the shower was Lynn's mother. Her mom showed up late to the shower, didn't bring a present for her own daughter, and proceeded to loudly tell Lynn about how she wasn't sure if she would be able to take off work for the wedding. Asharah's comment: At Walmart? She can't find somebody to take over her shift for ONE DAY? After thinking about it some, she allowed as how she might make it, but she'd probably be wearing her work clothes still. Never once did she offer congratulations to her daughter or ask a single question about how Lynn was holding up. At some point, in between stomach episodes, I believe I had to hold my own mother back from ejecting Lynn's mother from the party. Although Lynn didn't show it, you could see that her mom's callousness was hurtful to her.
I recovered from the stomach virus in about a week, during which I stayed at my parent's house, and my mom and I couldn't stop talking about Lynn's mother. This behavior horrified my mom on a very deep level, and she and I told my father about it. About a month later was the wedding, to which my whole family was invited. It was a lovely, small wedding and Lynn and Tom were obviously very happy. Her mother did make it to the wedding, and she was indeed in her work clothes. This wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact that she didn't even bother to remove her Wal-Mart smock. I could understand (barely) that maybe she wouldn't have time to change out of her work clothes, but all she had to do was take of the smock and just wear the shirt she had on underneath. Asharah's comment: Was she getting paid extra for drumming up business? During the reception, the best part came when my father told Mom and me that he'd met Lynn's mother, and she seem really nice and very interested in Bri. My mom asked him who he was talking about, and he pointed to "Janet" who was a lovely woman who'd been sitting at our table, dressed in a peach suit. Mom and I sort of giggled as we told him that that was Lynn's STEP-mother, who'd done twice as much for this wedding as Lynn's biological mother. Dad looked a bit nonplussed and asked who Lynn's mother WAS then. As we pointed out the lady in the Wal-Mart smock, you could see the disbelief in my father's eyes. Fortunately this story has a happy ending, Lynn and Tom are still married, and they remain good friends of mine. She doesn't see her mother very much, and I'm pretty sure everyone is happier that was. To this day, however, if you want to see my mother go into a fit of apoplectic rage, all you have to do is mention Lynn's mom in her presence.
Asharah's comment: Well, I think all Lynn's mother did was make herself look bad with her behavior!