Most unhelpful airline attendants ever!

[Shoo]

First, it is unfortunate that this woman over-stretched herself and was not able to handle the luggage and child that she was flying with. But it is not the job of the flight attendants to assist people with their luggage. It is also not their job to clean up sick children, or to make sure that everyone is comfortable. Perhaps in the good old days, when airline travel was an expensive luxury, but not now. And just because this woman was travelling with an infant, did not entitled her to any extra assistance. If she chose to fly, then she should ensure she can manage the trip and what it entails.

Second, I think the person who was most inconsiderate in this story was the woman herself. If other passengers were looking on in distaste because her child was coughing and vomiting, it wasn't because they were being disturbed, it was because in the close confines and recycled air, what she was doing was potentially spreading her germs to every other person on that plane.

It may not be a FA's "job" to clean up, etc. but how difficult would it have been to hand that poor mother a paper towel?  And, as I'm sure you read in the OP, the baby had been okay until 20 minutes before the flight.  Too late for the mom to do anything about it.  

How any FA could witness what this mother and her baby were going through and not lend a helping hand of *some* type is both appalling and unfortunate.  

Perhaps that airline's FA training school should add a course in compassion, with extra credit given for overt displays of humanity.  Both seem to be sorely lacking - and not just on that particular flight.

[fklwmn]

You know, comfort may be secondary in the job of the FA's but the issue (as it seems to me) is that in order to get this woman settled in a reasonable amuount of time, she needed assistance. since it is the FA's job to make sure that passengers are settled and ready for takeoff, it was their job to assist her so that she could get everything stowed and the baby taken care of, rather than yelling at her to sit down. Were I the stressed out mom (which I have been more than once on a flight!) their yelling at me would have been more hinderance than help - adding to my stress and causing me to be even more frazzled, therefore slower.

When the FAs opted not to do that part of their job, other passengers (the OP) had to step in. I'm sure that because of their help, this woman was able to get things taken care of much more quickly. Once the plane had taken off and was en route, the FAs certainly shoul have seen if there was anything they could do to make the woman and/or her child more comfortable - just like they should do with any guest.

No one likes flying with a sick person, and it seems even fewer people like flying with infants. But it IS the season for colds and flu, and travel plans can't always be changed b/c you have come down with a cough. Any time of year, when you board an airplane you are knowingly assuming the risk associated with breathing that recycled air. And according to mom, the baby was fine until right before the flight. I'm not sure why everyone is flaming the mom here, it sounds to me like she was doing the best she could in a bad situation. Babies vomit for all kinds of reasons... not all of them are illness related. I had one who vomitted multiple times a day... and most often when we were out in a place where we could not easily or readily clean up.

[veryfluffy]

So we're flying home and one of the last people to board the plane is a frazzled looking mom with a 18-month-old little boy. She was all by herself. She obviously had a terrible cold and the kid was coughing like crazy, big hacking coughs that you could tell were one second away from bringing something up. She was trying to carry both of their carry ons and him. No one made a move to help her, all the attendants did was remind her that the plane was taking off in three minutes and she had to get settled.
Just as she's about to sit down (across the aisle from us), the baby throws up down the front of her shirt....The attendants start yelling that the plane is taxiing and she HAS TO SIT DOWN. Without making any move to help her clean up or get the baby comfortable
We had Mom and kid reasonably clean and comfy in about two minutes, with the attendants now screaming at us to SIT DOWN....Even though the kid threw up several more times, the airline staff made no attempt to help her or offer her anything to make her or the baby more comfortable. In fact, one attendant chastised us for standing after she had told Mom to sit down and told us it could be considered violation of some air safety law.

So when a child vomits onto itself as the plane is taxiing to take off, the flight attendants are supposed to abandon their procedures and clean up the poor little sick mite? I'm sure everyone on board would have been perfectly okay with missing a take-off slot, and of course the requirement that people remain in their seats is just a silly little bureaucratic rule.

It doesn't sound like this was any sort of emergency, and to compare it to someone have a heart attack is a bit disingenuous. And if the child continued to throw up, what are the flight attendants supposed to do? Why wasn't the mother carrying her wet wipes along with the rest of her excessive paraphernalia? She sounds completely scatty and ill-prepared for so much as a trip to the park, never mind a flight.

[Linda1967]

First, it is unfortunate that this woman over-stretched herself and was not able to handle the luggage and child that she was flying with. But it is not the job of the flight attendants to assist people with their luggage. It is also not their job to clean up sick children, or to make sure that everyone is comfortable. Perhaps in the good old days, when airline travel was an expensive luxury, but not now. And just because this woman was travelling with an infant, did not entitled her to any extra assistance. If she chose to fly, then she should ensure she can manage the trip and what it entails.

Second, I think the person who was most inconsiderate in this story was the woman herself. If other passengers were looking on in distaste because her child was coughing and vomiting, it wasn't because they were being disturbed, it was because in the close confines and recycled air, what she was doing was potentially spreading her germs to every other person on that plane.

I agree with veryfluffy. If the mother knew that the child wasn't feeling well 20 minutes before boarding the plane, then why didn't she postpone flying until the child was feeling better, even if that meant taking a flight the next day or the day after that?

I remember that when I was a child, my parents had planned a long-awaited vacation for our family, but on the day that we were supposed to leave, my little sister got sick, and so my parents cancelled our vacation. Of course, my older sister and I were upset, but my parents did the right thing, since it would have been cruel for my parents to take my sister away from home when she wasn't feeling well - not to mention inconsiderate to other travelers that she would expose to her germs while we were traveling.

I really don't have much sympathy with people who travel with infants and small children and then whine about how hard it is to manage traveling with them, or expect strangers and a flight crew to automatically help them with their children. If they wanted an easier trip, then they should not have taken their children along.

[ZipTheWonder]

If the FAs can't get people to sit, they would have to alert the pilot, and the takeoff would be aborted.

It would behoove the FA's to have assisted this woman to her seat.  Had they done so, the OP would not have been out of hers.  And, after all, the FA's *are* allowed to be out of their seats until they get to the runway.

I have been on a flight aborted on the runaway because of a medical situation, and I have also been on a flight where a passenger became ill in-flight.  I assure you that the FA's *do* have a responsibility to ill passengers, I'm just not sure how far it extends.  But,any decent human being would have grabbed a few towels and some water, so that the passenger did not have to be out of her seat, rummaging through an overhead compartment for them.

[freakyfemme]

So we're flying home and one of the last people to board the plane is a frazzled looking mom with a 18-month-old little boy. She was all by herself. She obviously had a terrible cold and the kid was coughing like crazy, big hacking coughs that you could tell were one second away from bringing something up. She was trying to carry both of their carry ons and him. No one made a move to help her, all the attendants did was remind her that the plane was taking off in three minutes and she had to get settled.
Just as she's about to sit down (across the aisle from us), the baby throws up down the front of her shirt....The attendants start yelling that the plane is taxiing and she HAS TO SIT DOWN. Without making any move to help her clean up or get the baby comfortable
We had Mom and kid reasonably clean and comfy in about two minutes, with the attendants now screaming at us to SIT DOWN....Even though the kid threw up several more times, the airline staff made no attempt to help her or offer her anything to make her or the baby more comfortable. In fact, one attendant chastised us for standing after she had told Mom to sit down and told us it could be considered violation of some air safety law.

So when a child vomits onto itself as the plane is taxiing to take off, the flight attendants are supposed to abandon their procedures and clean up the poor little sick mite? I'm sure everyone on board would have been perfectly okay with missing a take-off slot, and of course the requirement that people remain in their seats is just a silly little bureaucratic rule.

It doesn't sound like this was any sort of emergency, and to compare it to someone have a heart attack is a bit disingenuous. And if the child continued to throw up, what are the flight attendants supposed to do? Why wasn't the mother carrying her wet wipes along with the rest of her excessive paraphernalia? She sounds completely scatty and ill-prepared for so much as a trip to the park, never mind a flight.

Well, that's a little judgemental, isn't it?  Maybe she'd run out of Wet Wipes, or she had a mental checklist in her head, and she was thinking, Cheerios.....bottle......teething ring.......check, plus all HER things, and simply *forgot* Wet Wipes.  Maybe it was her first time travelling with an infant, and she didn't know exactly how to prepare.  That doesn't make her a bad parent or an inconsiderate person, it makes her a flawed human being like the rest of us. 

[ZipTheWonder]

I really don't have much sympathy with people who travel with infants and small children and then whine about how hard it is to manage traveling with them, or expect strangers and a flight crew to automatically help them with their children. If they wanted an easier trip, then they should not have taken their children along.

How do you feel about adult passengers whose companions in travel request strangers to assist them between gates or with stowing carryons?  

I just cannot imagine standing by and watching a struggling human being and doing nothing.  I don't care if it's a mom with a baby, a caregiver to someone disabled, or a college athlete trying to get an awkward bag stowed.  Why is "Could I help you with that?" such a big deal?

[willow08]

All good points, Twik.

[Tabris]

Here's my question, I guess. If a single passenger with no children had vomited, what would the flight attendants have done? Would they have just left it there, or would they have helped her, offered her a paper towel or a bottle of water, etc?

BTW, good flight attendants get *very* upset when you tell them another airline employee said something reasonable was not their job and you should take care of it on the plane. When I was flying with my husband and my four month old baby, they seated us in three separate places for one flight and all in an emergency exit row in another. They refused to change these seating assignments because it "wasn't their job." So for the first leg of the flight, I calmly seated us in the emergency exit row. The flight attendant came right over and explained that we weren't allowed to sit there, and I showed her the boarding passes and explained to her that I had thought that was the law, but "Sheryl when we checked in said it wasn't her job to make sure you complied with federal law." The flight attendant got that "I shall now commit homicide" look in her eyes and promptly reseated us. I hope she also reseated Sheryl right out of a job...

[MsEva]

 And, how would the FA's feel if everyone on the plane had an "it's not MY job" attitude about opening the window exits in an emergency - I am damsher that's not a passenger's job.

Actually, if you are sitting in an exit row it is your job. If you do not agree to take on the responsibility to open the emergency exit in case of an emergency and assist passengers down the chute, you will be moved to another non-exit row. You also have to be physically able to do this which is why you should never see really the frail, infirmed, or small children seated in those rows. I believe that is an FAA rule.

And to all the people that are mom bashing - no one knows why this mother was on that flight. She could have be going to be with a gravely ill loved one, or maybe someone had died. Maybe there was an appointment with some sort of specialist for a medical condition. She may not have had a good choice to make. Sometimes things just happen and the rest of us should have some compassion.

I think it is sad that the world has gotten to the point where a person cannot count on the kindness of strangers when they really need it. Willow and her DH did the absolute right thing by offering help instead of giving dirty looks like most of the other passengers.

The FAs should have given some towels as soon as the plane took off and the FAs could leave their jump seats. The FAs do not help with carryons because it is in most of their contracts that they are not supposed to lift carryons. If the FAs get hurt by moving a passenger's carryon, they do not get workers comp. It's too bad, so sad for the FA since they broke their contract. Also, most FAs get only vacation days so when those are used they don't get paid if they don't fly.

[Bethalize]

No one likes flying with a sick person,

I had a terrible cough on a 14 hour flight from Malaysia to the UK. Six hours in I could feel the hatred coming of people who were mentally calculating if they should shove me out the air lock or just murder me in the loo and flush my body.

[kherbert05]

The flight attendant came right over and explained that we weren't allowed to sit there, and I showed her the boarding passes and explained to her that I had thought that was the law, but "Sheryl when we checked in said it wasn't her job to make sure you complied with federal law." The flight attendant got that "I shall now commit homicide" look in her eyes and promptly reseated us. I hope she also reseated Sheryl right out of a job...

[/size]

That FA did a good job. I once was traveling (Pre 9/11) with my two young cousins. Their parents paid for my ticket to go home over a short University break, if I took the kids to their grandparents. Cool with me they are good kids. We were seated in the emergency row.

Kids were 5 and 8, I was 18 but probably couldn't have shifted that door if I had to. The flight was only 2/3 full and a puddle jump between Austin and Houston.

I said something to the ticket counter "Oh it isn't a problem"

I said something to the gate person before boarding "Oh it isn't a problem"

I said something to the FA "Oh it isn't a problem"

We are taxing the FA runs to our seats and insists that the kids have to move NOW - but she won't let me move. She practically rips them out of their seats, and they are yelling for me. I tell them to calm down and I'll move after take off.

After when the wheels went up I heard the 5 year old tell his 8 yo sister that something had fallen off the plane. (They are good kids but kids). I ask the FA when the seatbelt light will probably go off so I can move. She sneers, "Never the flight is to short and if you move while it is on I'll have your arrested."

I lost it and in an icy voice told her that we would soon have a hysterical 8 yo and I was moving. She could press charges, but we would press counter charges for her rough handling of my cousins. Then I mentioned with a smile My Dad knows all the news guys, he plays golf with big consumer advocate (of white hair and colored glasses). She gulped and let me move to the kids.

The thing about the consumer advocate technically true. Dad played at the same CC and got in the same foursome for a scramble - but he couldn't stand the guy.

We told my Aunt the kids grandmother what happened and she marched right to the counter and to file a complaint. When we got there an older gentleman was there also filing a complaint. He told my aunt he was afraid I would file a complaint because I was young and he couldn't let such rude and cruel behavior pass.

[behindbj]

I am going to make an extraordinary request...

In fact, I am BEGGING (and I rarely, if ever, beg for ANYTHING).

Please please PLEASE do not turn this thread into a "kids should not be on planes thread" - that's not what this is about.  It is about how unhelpful the flight attendants were on the flight.  Ths thread would be just as valid if the sick person were an adult traveling companion (seen it happen - but the FA's were very helpful).

I agree with the many different sides of this discussion: 

1.  Yes, the mother should have been better prepared

2.  (And this is mine) She could have arrived at the airport earlier (if she could - I do know people who rush to the airport late with their children so they can cut into security lines, saying "But we have to make it for the CHILLLLLLDRUUUN!" - maybe not the case here, who knows - we do know she was late and lucky to be admitted onto the flight at all.  Most flights close the door 10 minutes before takeoff to finalize the headcount and finish the safety check).

3.  If she knew she was going to have her hands full with the kid, she should have checked her luggage.  A pain, I know - but sometimes being a parent is a pain.

4.  The FAs had every right to do their jobs and make sure that the passengers were seated and ready for takeoff.

5.  Once the flight was in the air, though, the FAs could have been more helpful.   Don't know how helpful that could have been past water and paper towels, but something...

6.  I agree that helping her was the right thing to do.  Edited to clarify:  The help was great, but should have come once the plane was in the air.  When told to be seated for takeoff, folks need to be seated for takeoff.

Sometimes the stars just align and your day just $ucks.  Sometimes, we could all be better prepared.

As for the argument for not being able to depend on the kindness of strangers, I disagree.  I count on the kindness of strangers when needed and/or in an emergency - I do not DEPEND on it.  I try to be prepared and hope that my fellow humans can lend a hand if I really need it.  But to expect everyone around you to compensate for everything you may need - not reasonable.  A subtle difference I know, but a difference all the same.  If the mother (or anyone) overburdens herself to the point that she cannot function getting on and off a plane with a child with the thought the rest of the world will jump in, that's awfully presumptuous and a little entitled.  That includes adults without kids, not just folks with children. 

And that's from someone who is usually "the kindness of strangers" when she sees a need or is asked for help.

And, as a complete aside, I was on a Southwest flight from Cleveland.  During takeoff, the flight attendant stated that because the flight was so short (about 1 hour), they would start snack and beverage service during takeoff.  We were asked to lean into the aisle and put our hands down.  I heard "Heeeeeeere they come!!"

And saw bags of peanuts rolling down the aisle as the plane tipped up to take off.

One of the best flights ever.  It just got sillier from there.

behindbj

[ShadesOfGrey]

I am going to make an extraordinary request...

In fact, I am BEGGING (and I rarely, if ever, beg for ANYTHING).

Please please PLEASE do not turn this thread into a "kids should not be on planes thread" - that's not what this is about.  It is about how unhelpful the flight attendants were on the flight.  Ths thread would be just as valid if the sick person were an adult traveling companion (seen it happen - but the FA's were very helpful).

I agree with the many different sides of this discussion: 

1.  Yes, the mother should have been better prepared
2.  (And this is mine) She could have arrived at the airport earlier
3.  If she knew she was going to have her hands full with the kid, she should have checked her luggage.  A pain, I know - but sometimes being a parent is a pain.
4.  The FAs had every right to do their jobs and make sure that the passengers were seated and ready for takeoff.
5.  Once the flight was in the air, though, the FAs could have been more helpful.   Don't know how helpful that could have been past water and paper towels, but something...
6.  I agree that helping her was the right thing to do.
Sometimes the stars just align and your day just $ucks.  Sometimes, we could all be better prepared.

I agree with you until #6 - if the plane was taxi-ing, everyone should have stayed in their seats (but perhaps they could have passed said airsick bags/blankets/wet ones across the seats without standing - yes it may have been a pain, yes it may have involved some reaching)  Post take-off though, by all means help away. 

[Linda1967]

As for the argument for not being able to depend on the kindness of strangers, I disagree.  I count on the kindness of strangers when needed and/or in an emergency - I do not DEPEND on it.  I try to be prepared and hope that my fellow humans can lend a hand if I really need it.  But to expect everyone around you to compensate for everything you may need - not reasonable.  A subtle difference I know, but a difference all the same.  If the mother (or anyone) overburdens herself to the point that she cannot function getting on and off a plane with a child with the thought the rest of the world will jump in, that's awfully presumptuous and a little entitled.  That includes adults without kids, not just folks with children. 

That was the point I was trying to make in my post. I have helped people without them asking for my help first if I saw that they needed help, and I have helped people who have asked politely. Usually, it's been senior citizens who politely say, "Excuse me - could you give me a hand with this?"

But I am not going to help someone who whines about how haaaard it is to travel with children, or rudely says, "I'm a mother! Will you PLEASE help me!"

I've had it with the better-than-you, entitled attitude I have received from parents, and others, who are poorly prepared and expect others to automatically bend over backwards to help them, so I ignore them.