From the boss' perspective: Christmas gifts from employees

[Chocolate Cake]

My husband has 11 employees of both genders who are scattered through-out the country in various offices.   For several years, he has given his employees gift boxes of food items for Christmas from a catalog company (Harry & David) in order to partially show his appreciation for their hard work and to wish them a Merry Christmas...sometimes it's jams/pancake mix/English muffin combinations and other times it's sausage/cheese/crackers combinations, etc.   

A year or so ago, one of his employees decided to reciprocate with a similar type of gift box to my husband.   It wasn't expected and we actually felt kind of bad that the employee would spend his money giving the boss a gift.   But we understood that maybe the employee felt the need to reciprocate after being on the receiving end all these years.

Now, however, it appears that a number of other employees have either independently decided to reciprocate or word has spread like wildfire that the "Cheyenne Employee" gave the boss a gift so others felt they needed to do it also.   With 11 employees, can you see where this is going?

Yep...this week we got our fifth food gift box from an employee.  When my husband came home from work and saw it on our doorstep, his face dropped and he said, "OH, NO!"  Not exactly the reaction the employee would have wanted if they could have seen it, I'm sure.   However, we are so totally over-run with sausages, pears, crackers, nuts, candy, and cheese that we can hardly see straight.   I'm giving it away to neighbors, friends.....anyone who will take some of it off our hands.    At this point, we're praying that the other 6 employees haven't heard what the first 5 have done or we'll be in real trouble.

So......we think something must be done next year to stop the deluge of food.   Would you Etiquette Mavens suggest:

1)  Do nothing.   Let the employees gift us if they feel the need.  Continue to give away the excess as necessary.

2)  Somehow explain to the employees that reciprocating is not at all necessary and run the risk of hurting their feelings.

3)  Somehow suggest that, if they feel they must gift my husband, consider joining forces and give one item from everyone.  But, how to word this?

4)   My husband should stop gifting the employees at Christmas next year so they feel no need to reciprocate.

5)  Open a food pantry out of our house in December of next year.

HELP! 

[dawbs]

that's a tough line to walk.

I personally would suggest that you quit giving "gifts" to the employees and give them the amount that would have been spent either in gift-cards or as a bonus.  (not only because I, as an employee in a business relationship, feel than most of the time it's preferable, but also because then it remains "business like" and avoids the Repricoticy-of-gifts-trap)

(edited because I can't spell and I hit post before I finished my sentence.

[kingsrings]

I agree with what dawbs is saying. That is the least awkward way to handle it without appearing rude, presumptious, or hurting anyone's feelings by telling them no. And since you are overrun with food now, you might consider giving what you don't want to a food pantry. At this time of the year, they are really looking for donations, and those kinds of food would be a great treat to the less fortunate who don't get a lot of that kind of stuff.

[Chocolate Cake]

Would gift cards really be all that different than a gift of gourmet food?  I mean, it's still a gift.  I'm afraid that we would then start receiving gift cards in return.

(P.S.  Just to clarify -- the cost for these gifts come entirely from our pocket and are from us, personally, not the company.  Employee's bonuses, merit increases, stock options, etc. is a completely different situation that is handled by the corporate office in June of each year.  Employees are well aware that our Christmas gift is just that and not a substitute or in any way part of their compensation program.)

[Shoo]

Would gift cards really be all that different than a gift of gourmet food?  I mean, it's still a gift.  I'm afraid that we would then start receiving gift cards in return.

(P.S.  Just to clarify -- the cost for these gifts come entirely from our pocket and are from us, personally, not the company.  Employee's bonuses, merit increases, stock options, etc. is a completely different situation that is handled by the corporate office in June of each year.  Employees are well aware that our Christmas gift is just that and not a substitute or in any way part of their compensation program.)

I think the only way to stop the reciprocity is to stop giving the employees gifts.  Maybe next year you and your dh could send out an email to everyone stating that in lieu of gifts, you propose adopting a family and anyone who wants to participate can get something for this family.  ?

[graceh9]

[be gracious this year but next October 30 send out notices that make very clear that no gifts should be sent to the boss.

[dawbs]

Would gift cards really be all that different than a gift of gourmet food?  I mean, it's still a gift.  I'm afraid that we would then start receiving gift cards in return.

Honestly, I think they are.
when I get a GC, in a business setting, I think of it as a "bonus" more than I think if it as a "gift"

[Slartibartfast]

I don't think there's much you can do (while still following etiquette) to acknowledge that you're receiving gifts or that you want it to stop.  However, if your husband gives his employees individual gift boxes of food, could he get something for the office or break room instead?  Maybe one eleven-person-sized basket of cookies, crackers, and fruit to go in the break room where people can help themselves?  It would be less "gift-like" than individual boxes, and your husband could send out an email that says "because gift-giving in the office started to get out of hand last year, please help yourself to XXXXX in the back room in lieu of receiving individual baskets.  I am proud to work with you, and I wish you all a wonderful Holiday season".  (Okay, so that wording still came out a bit harsh, but there should be some way to say "we're not doing gifts, this is not really a gift, but help yourself.")

[Chocolate Cake]

We would love to do just as you suggested but, unfortunately, the employees are spread around the country.

[dawbs]

could you have food delivered to break rooms around the country?
Sounds odd, I know, but perhaps let peple know in advance, find a national chain (for pizza or the like?) and have enough food for all of 'em (and leftovers) sent?

[sammycat]

My husband and I are business owners also so I can understand where you are coming from.  We only have 4 employees and thankfully none of them has ever gifted us, (some do give us a Christmas card though) and I would feel very awkward if they did.  All I can suggest is, instead of the gift basket you just give gift cards.  We started out giving hampers/baskets but felt that it would be more appreciated by the employees to receive either a cash bonus or gift card, so that's we put into their Christmas card on the last day of work.

[Shoo]

Sammycat, that's a great solution.

If you're definitely going to give your employee's a gift, give it to them at the last possible moment so there's no way they have time to reciprocate.

[fklwmn]

are they harry and david too? if so, I suggest sending any excess to me!!!

 

[sammycat]

Shoo - we hand them their Christmas card with cash or gift card literally as they are walking out the door on the last work day, so definitely no time to rush out and reciprocate! If the last day of work is Christmas Eve itself then even better.  

[magicdomino]

What is the corporate policy on giving gifts to bosses?  I'm a federal employee and we are not allowed to give anything more than a token gift to a superior, unless it is a group gift for a really big event like retirement.  A lot of companies have similar rules.