I agree (for the most part
) with your responses. The "yes, there's no doubt" statement was because you asked (didn't realize it was rhetorical) & lends itself to the explanation of why it's not something I'm looking too much into- the disparity of our standards of living is severe- not so much in that I live in a hole, but that they live lives that are essentially unattainable. Sorry for not being more explicit before: I used the initial post's quote because that is the most common reaction I receive, but you'd have to be there to witness it to really understand- think saucer eyes, mouth agape, quizzical look at my lack of head-to-toe designer branding. You know when you're being evaluated. It is not a transparent gesture.
As to why it matters to me... good point. How they spend their money is not
any of my business, yet they have continually made it such, dollar amounts and all , in every conversation I've had with them, singularly or in a group setting (the socially discussing money is another etiquette violation for another discussion). Then in private to his coworkers, the husband laments no money (again, nevermind the adverse affect it can have on the company). I just have no tolerance for lies, which is what these people are living & the standard to which I apparently am being held. And, yes, I resent that. Like I said before, I have lived in several other places as an adult and this is the first time I have come across this behavior- either the spending or the evaluation. I do know "stupid rich" (by virtue of inheritance) people, too, and all of those live much more restrained lives than those of whom I'm speaking.
Thanks for the help. Anyone have a good bean dip suggestion?