Author Topic: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.  (Read 278017 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Piratelvr1121

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 10499
Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #1935 on: April 17, 2014, 09:40:57 PM »
We went to the Holy Thursday service at our church tonight. Thankfully there was a nursery but as always it only lasts till right after we pass the peace and collection is taken.  Youngest pirate was tired, which of course meant he was naughtier than usual and kept slipping out of the pew to run out of the nave.

The second time he did it, he ran right into the glass doors that separate the Nave from the rest of the second floor of the church.  He wasn't hurt enough to cry but he did say "Ow!" quietly and then instructed me as to where he needed kisses.
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Tashigi

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 625
Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #1936 on: Yesterday at 03:14:29 AM »
Old story that led to a recent conversation with the Gentleman Friend. To wit:
Oh!  Oh!  The ground squirrel reminded me of one.  But it's BAAAADDD.

A friend of mine was pet-sitting for a friend who owned a boa constrictor and was on vacation for three weeks.  I think twice a week, Friend was supposed to go to the house and feed the snake.  The house was really pretty, the snake cage was the centerpiece of the room it was in and there was a whole sort of Asian feel to the room.  And off to the side was the mouse farm that served as the snake's menu.

SnakeOwner didn't get a chance to show Friend whole feeding procedure but explained that you had to give the snake a mouse twice a week and here are the things you should check the snake for and left a whole detailed list of "reasons to call the snake vet" and "stuff that will make the house blow up."

First feeding day, Friend goes to the house and immediately realizes that she hadn't thought this through carefully because this job first involves catching a mouse. Mice know when they're about to be fed to a snake and so, when she reached her hand into the mouse farm, CHOMP, she was bit.  Scrounges around and finds some gloves next to the mouse farm, along with a little wooden table and a mallet and a Zen sand thingy and bitty rake and other oddments.  Huh.  On with the gloves, catches a mouse, tosses it into the snake's cage and that part of the process is done.  She waters the plants, sorts the mail, and goes back to her life.

Comes back several days later only to find the snake looking a little peaked and a skinny but sassy mouse zooming around in the snake's cage.  Huh?  Friend isn't reaching in to the snake's cage to take the mouse out so she tosses a little mouse food into the snake cage, repeats the rest of her routine and leaves.  Comes back a couple of days later and the mouse is still hale and healthy but the snake is eyeing her in a way that doesn't seem entirely friendly.  Now she's worried.  She calls the vet, who says that the snake will eat when it's hungry and asks her other questions that are hard to answer about a snake that you barely know.  So Friend does the only sensible thing and calls SnakeOwner to explain the situation.

SnakeOwner can't understand why her snake won't eat.  You sure you got a new mouse?  And it was alive? You didn't hit it too hard?

Wait.  What?

Well, it turns out that the snake doesn't eat dead mice.  It also won't eat running around mice.  So you have to knock the mouse unconcious before it goes into the snake cage.  That's what the little wooden table and mallet are for - you get the mouse out of the farm, cup it on the wooden table and smack it with the hammer hard enough to knock it unconcious but not enough to kill it.  Turns out that takes a knack - not everyone can stun a mouse.

Friend still can't actually bring herself to reach into the snake's cage to fish for the living mouse in there, so she tosses some more mouse food in and then fishes out another mouse, WHACKS it on its little mousey head and gives it to the snake who apparently doesn't care so much about the distinction between living and dead after a week of no food because it jumps on little Mousey FooFoo like a reptile avenger.

And Friend suddenly understood why it was that SnakeOwner would hum the Bunny FooFoo song when it was feeding time.


I sent the Gentleman Friend this picture with accompanying text: "I want one."

His response: I am amused at the thought of you cackling maniacally whilst feeding what looks to be a venomous snake live mice.

My haughty response:
I wouldn't be cackling.
-pause-
I would be singing "Little Bunny Foo Foo."

Piratelvr1121

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 10499
Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #1937 on: Yesterday at 10:28:59 AM »
My older two were serving as acolytes (alter boys)  in our Maundy Thursday service the other night and while there was nursery, it only lasts until after the passing of the peace so that the children can participate in communion. 

As the service started at 7, by the time communion rolled around, my little pirate was antsy. After communion there is a very quiet time when the priest and lay ministers take off the vestments, leaving just the black gown underneath and turn the lights down.  Littlest pirate was even more antsy and decided to slip out the pew and was running out of the church.

Only there are glass doors into the Nave...which were closed.  He didn't see them and ran right into it!  The fact that he didn't cry made me feel less guilty about it. That and two adults standing by on the other side of the door also saw and tried not to laugh.

He just kind of lightly bounced off them really, shook his head and went "Oh!" before trying again to get through. :)
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Kimblee

  • I look good in white....
  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6615
  • "Hugs don't go Boom." "They don't? Since when?"
    • My Blog
Re: Things that you just should NOT laugh at.
« Reply #1938 on: Yesterday at 01:56:25 PM »
Old story that led to a recent conversation with the Gentleman Friend. To wit:
Oh!  Oh!  The ground squirrel reminded me of one.  But it's BAAAADDD.

A friend of mine was pet-sitting for a friend who owned a boa constrictor and was on vacation for three weeks.  I think twice a week, Friend was supposed to go to the house and feed the snake.  The house was really pretty, the snake cage was the centerpiece of the room it was in and there was a whole sort of Asian feel to the room.  And off to the side was the mouse farm that served as the snake's menu.

SnakeOwner didn't get a chance to show Friend whole feeding procedure but explained that you had to give the snake a mouse twice a week and here are the things you should check the snake for and left a whole detailed list of "reasons to call the snake vet" and "stuff that will make the house blow up."

First feeding day, Friend goes to the house and immediately realizes that she hadn't thought this through carefully because this job first involves catching a mouse. Mice know when they're about to be fed to a snake and so, when she reached her hand into the mouse farm, CHOMP, she was bit.  Scrounges around and finds some gloves next to the mouse farm, along with a little wooden table and a mallet and a Zen sand thingy and bitty rake and other oddments.  Huh.  On with the gloves, catches a mouse, tosses it into the snake's cage and that part of the process is done.  She waters the plants, sorts the mail, and goes back to her life.

Comes back several days later only to find the snake looking a little peaked and a skinny but sassy mouse zooming around in the snake's cage.  Huh?  Friend isn't reaching in to the snake's cage to take the mouse out so she tosses a little mouse food into the snake cage, repeats the rest of her routine and leaves.  Comes back a couple of days later and the mouse is still hale and healthy but the snake is eyeing her in a way that doesn't seem entirely friendly.  Now she's worried.  She calls the vet, who says that the snake will eat when it's hungry and asks her other questions that are hard to answer about a snake that you barely know.  So Friend does the only sensible thing and calls SnakeOwner to explain the situation.

SnakeOwner can't understand why her snake won't eat.  You sure you got a new mouse?  And it was alive? You didn't hit it too hard?

Wait.  What?

Well, it turns out that the snake doesn't eat dead mice.  It also won't eat running around mice.  So you have to knock the mouse unconcious before it goes into the snake cage.  That's what the little wooden table and mallet are for - you get the mouse out of the farm, cup it on the wooden table and smack it with the hammer hard enough to knock it unconcious but not enough to kill it.  Turns out that takes a knack - not everyone can stun a mouse.

Friend still can't actually bring herself to reach into the snake's cage to fish for the living mouse in there, so she tosses some more mouse food in and then fishes out another mouse, WHACKS it on its little mousey head and gives it to the snake who apparently doesn't care so much about the distinction between living and dead after a week of no food because it jumps on little Mousey FooFoo like a reptile avenger.

And Friend suddenly understood why it was that SnakeOwner would hum the Bunny FooFoo song when it was feeding time.


I sent the Gentleman Friend this picture with accompanying text: "I want one."

His response: I am amused at the thought of you cackling maniacally whilst feeding what looks to be a venomous snake live mice.

My haughty response:
I wouldn't be cackling.
-pause-
I would be singing "Little Bunny Foo Foo."

I believe that is a white Lindheimer's Ratsnake.

Nonvenomous and if you get a baby, can be quite docile and even friendly.