Author Topic: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart  (Read 749960 times)

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OSUJillyBean

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3855 on: May 06, 2013, 12:36:12 PM »
I just use an ammonia-based cleaner and go on with life instead of worrying about chlorine-gassing the BeanKitty.

cwm

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3856 on: May 08, 2013, 11:12:34 AM »
Okay, my first post, but I've spent all week (at work, no less) reading this entire thread. And some of them have been doozies, but here goes some of my "greatest hits" from my last job, to start with.

I used to work in a grooming salon. We had a puppy come in one day, cute little thing. He was acting kind of slow, but we figured it was probably nerves, as he was being very good for everything. I bathed him and dried him and put him into a kennel to work on another dog and give him a break when I heard a horking sound. I turned around slowly and looked at what he had left in the bottom of his kennel. It was a very skimpy undergarment, mostly intact. I re-bathed the puppy (who felt so much better now) and had the most awkward conversation when I had to call his owners and tell them what he'd done, and then ask if they wanted it back. Thankfully, they declined.

We also had a dog in one day who had eaten an entire four pack of Cadbury's Creme Eggs. I only know this because they came back up. Wrappers and all.

We frequently had frightened dogs, but the one that takes the prize for the most terrified was a cocker spaniel that managed to get up under our computer desk, poop all over the printer and desk fixtures, and then spray diarrhea all over the rest of everything else in the front. We couldn't re-bathe him because he was too scared.

I can say for certain, anal gland secretions taste just as foul as they smell. We didn't do internal expression, but there were some days where we'd have little guys come in with toothpaste stuck up in there, or so it seemed. They always seemed to feel better after it came out.

I've seen a dog that had eaten pantyhose. They go through the digestive tract intact, but don't always want to come out at once. Cue two people holding the dog down and trying to keep it calm while a third kept tugging until it was all gone.

We had one dog come in one time, matted and stinky. Which happened all too frequently, sadly. But we began shaving the mats off, thinking that once we got it all stripped down and cleaned the smell would go away. Except, it had a giant infected abcess the size of its head under a mat on its neck. We called the owner and sent him to the vet to get him taken care of before we'd see him again, but that thing smelled AWFUL!

Then there was the one that came in with cutaneous horns and sebaceous cysts all over. I'd always knock off the loose horns at the pore, but this guy had ones worse than anything I've ever seen online anywhere. They covered him, we had to hand-scissor the entire dog because they covered his body entirely. I'd always work on squeezing out his pores from the keratinous stuff when I could, and he never minded, but some of these pores were the size of his paws, poor buddy.

I was also the only person brave enough to clean out behind all the kennels on a regular basis. I found, at various times, a five inch mushroom stalk (and I did clean it out every week, so it grew FAST), mold beds, homegrown mud in dog hair, more bugs than I care to count, and towels that fell under there that nobody cared to retrieve. I didn't care at that point that we had an outside towel service, I threw them away.

Now I'm off to introduce myself formally elsewhere, I just had to get this first batch of gross out of the way.

magicdomino

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3857 on: May 08, 2013, 11:17:17 AM »
Now I'm off to introduce myself formally elsewhere, I just had to get this first batch of gross out of the way.

That's usually the best thing to do with gross stuff.   :)  Welcome to the board!

ladyknight1

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3858 on: May 08, 2013, 11:35:22 AM »
Oh my goodness, I don't think I could be a groomer.

I have a cutaneous horn on my right eyelid. The ophthalmologist said it could be cancerous. I can't wait to get rid of it.

Diane AKA Traska

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3859 on: May 08, 2013, 01:36:19 PM »
I've seen a dog that had eaten pantyhose. They go through the digestive tract intact, but don't always want to come out at once. Cue two people holding the dog down and trying to keep it calm while a third kept tugging until it was all gone.

I cannot get the image out of my mind of a magician's dog eating the handkerchief chain...
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Elfmama

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3860 on: May 08, 2013, 04:43:58 PM »
I've seen a dog that had eaten pantyhose. They go through the digestive tract intact, but don't always want to come out at once. Cue two people holding the dog down and trying to keep it calm while a third kept tugging until it was all gone.

I cannot get the image out of my mind of a magician's dog eating the handkerchief chain...
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greencat

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3861 on: May 09, 2013, 11:32:52 PM »
I feel fortunate that every dog I've ever had has always chosen to shred things before swallowing them.  No poo-chains for me!

My parents used to have a cat that, uh, didn't attend to his own personal hygiene very well, and had long fluffy hair to boot.  There used to be arguments about who would have to hold the cat and who would have to try to remove the poo lumps from the fluff on the backs of his legs.

GreenEyedHawk

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3862 on: May 09, 2013, 11:52:10 PM »
Cwm, I used to be a groomer too, did it for 13 years.   Never got anal gland secretions in my mouth but I got a pretty good squlorch of them in my hair...shaved a few heavily matted dogs and found mildew on them.  You know....the usual.
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Ms_Cellany

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3863 on: May 10, 2013, 01:12:58 AM »
My parents used to have a cat that, uh, didn't attend to his own personal hygiene very well, and had long fluffy hair to boot.  There used to be arguments about who would have to hold the cat and who would have to try to remove the poo lumps from the fluff on the backs of his legs.

Luna's nickname is "Captain Dingleberry."
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Mental Magpie

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3864 on: May 10, 2013, 06:28:55 AM »
My parents used to have a cat that, uh, didn't attend to his own personal hygiene very well, and had long fluffy hair to boot.  There used to be arguments about who would have to hold the cat and who would have to try to remove the poo lumps from the fluff on the backs of his legs.

Luna's nickname is "Captain Dingleberry."

We often call Bansee "Poopy Pants" or say "she has poop in her pants!"
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Reika

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3865 on: May 10, 2013, 07:59:34 AM »
The "poopy pants" reminds me of something I went through once.

During my brief stint as a dog groomer, a guy brought in his dog who had medium length fur. Said pooch had managed to escape out of the house and go "swamping".

We smelled the dog even before he was brought in by his human. The poor guy had a scarf or something wrapped around his mouth and nose. Both my boss and I wished for the same thing, but we were out of luck. The owner stuck around long enough to throw down a hundred bucks as a deposit and his contact info before fleeing the store.

Me, being the hapless minion, got to do the initial brush out of the dog before the bath. Gag.

While I'm doing that, boss is setting up the info in her computer and asks, "Is the dog male or female?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"I don't know because there's so much stuff in the fur, I can't tell what's gunk or what's dog. And excuse me while I go puke." So she ran over to the dog as I ran to the porcelain god.

We took turns working on the dog, who was shamelessly grinning the whole time, and running to the bathroom. to get sick. Finally we get enough of the stuff out to wash him. And yes, the dog turned out to be male. And the evil creature managed to stink up the store but good. The rest of the customers kept asking "What is that smell?"

No idea what the boss charged the guy in addition to the money he gave, because she did for the sheer vileness of whatever it was the dog rolled in. It looked like he'd rolled in multiple decomposing bodies. Smelled like it too. She told the owner he was never allowed to bring the dog in to us again in that condition.

I got $20 as a tip, but let me tell you, it wasn't nearly enough for that awfulness.

siamesecat2965

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3866 on: May 10, 2013, 12:47:38 PM »
My parents used to have a cat that, uh, didn't attend to his own personal hygiene very well, and had long fluffy hair to boot.  There used to be arguments about who would have to hold the cat and who would have to try to remove the poo lumps from the fluff on the backs of his legs.

Luna's nickname is "Captain Dingleberry."

This is why I will never have a long haired cat.

and on the doggie anal gland stories, I am dogsitting for friends this week.  A big one and a little one. LIttle one is about 30 lbs, and has had issues in the past with abscesses right next to said gland. which means she goes to the vet, gets knocked out, and has it cleaned out. This happened on monday, the day they left ,and they day I started watching them.

that part isn't so gross as I wasn't around for it, thankfully. But now twice a day I have to hold her down, dab it with peroxide, and put some kind of medication INSIDE the hole, as it heals from the inside out. it doens't hurt her, and she's very good about it, but I'm not thrilled about being that up and close and personal to the dogs private parts.

Elfmama

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3867 on: May 10, 2013, 09:13:37 PM »
The "poopy pants" reminds me of something I went through once.

During my brief stint as a dog groomer, a guy brought in his dog who had medium length fur. Said pooch had managed to escape out of the house and go "swamping".

We smelled the dog even before he was brought in by his human. The poor guy had a scarf or something wrapped around his mouth and nose. Both my boss and I wished for the same thing, but we were out of luck. The owner stuck around long enough to throw down a hundred bucks as a deposit and his contact info before fleeing the store.

Me, being the hapless minion, got to do the initial brush out of the dog before the bath. Gag.

While I'm doing that, boss is setting up the info in her computer and asks, "Is the dog male or female?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"I don't know because there's so much stuff in the fur, I can't tell what's gunk or what's dog. And excuse me while I go puke." So she ran over to the dog as I ran to the porcelain god.

We took turns working on the dog, who was shamelessly grinning the whole time, and running to the bathroom. to get sick. Finally we get enough of the stuff out to wash him. And yes, the dog turned out to be male. And the evil creature managed to stink up the store but good. The rest of the customers kept asking "What is that smell?"

No idea what the boss charged the guy in addition to the money he gave, because she did for the sheer vileness of whatever it was the dog rolled in. It looked like he'd rolled in multiple decomposing bodies. Smelled like it too. She told the owner he was never allowed to bring the dog in to us again in that condition.

I got $20 as a tip, but let me tell you, it wasn't nearly enough for that awfulness.
Why in the world didn't the owner spray the critter down with a hose to get the worst of it off first?
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Reika

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3868 on: May 10, 2013, 09:33:30 PM »
Why in the world didn't the owner spray the critter down with a hose to get the worst of it off first?
[/quote]

Probably didn't want to be bothered. He had the dog jump up into the back of his truck and brought him over.

Dazi

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #3869 on: May 11, 2013, 01:39:59 PM »
So, about a week ago, I got home dog tired and crawled into bed.  Then I noticed I felt something wet about mid torso. 

One of my kitties had horked up a GIANT MUTANT hairball smack in the middle of my side of the bed...and they did that trailing away thing so there was a really good area of said hork. 

The sad part is I was so tired, I didn't even bother to go try and shower the slime off.  I just wiped myself off and stripped the sheet off, laid on my blanket, and slept liked the dead for next 9 hours. 

I  woke up to having my hair horked on.  So, I grabbed the guilty party and gave her a good dose of hairball remedy, much to her disgust, and went to wash the hork off me and put clean sheets and a pillowcase on my bed.  She feels much, much better now.
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