Author Topic: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart  (Read 692704 times)

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alkira6

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4830 on: January 22, 2014, 10:09:48 AM »
I have in the back of my car: spare khakis, 2 spare undies, spare bra, spare tee, spare blouse, large pack of wet wipes, travel deodorant, ziplock bags, hygiene kit, and $40 in small bills and change.

Yes I have had issues previously, why do you ask?  ;D

wonderfullyanonymous

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4831 on: January 22, 2014, 10:49:50 AM »
I am fighting a stomach virus. Thankfully I didn't throw up, but for a short time was thinking I was going to. I am now, however, peeing out my rear end. There is more liquid coming out the back than there is the front.

Yuck...

VorFemme

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4832 on: January 22, 2014, 11:11:48 AM »
I am fighting a stomach virus. Thankfully I didn't throw up, but for a short time was thinking I was going to. I am now, however, peeing out my rear end. There is more liquid coming out the back than there is the front.

Yuck...

Yeah - I've used that term before...VorGuy thinks that it is "too descriptive" but then when I get really descriptive, he suggests that I go back to "peeing out the backside" because that is enough description to get the point across without making him feel sick to his stomach.

He is NOT what I'd call a good nurse for sick family members...heck, he's not that good at first aid, either - he doesn't handle blood well.  Oddly, his sister is a registered nurse.
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ladyknight1

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4833 on: January 22, 2014, 12:09:40 PM »
DH refers to that as water hose butt or fire hose butt depending on the severity.

White Dragon

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4834 on: January 22, 2014, 03:02:22 PM »
Quote
Quote

He looked kind of puzzled and asked "So how come women don't keep a "go bag" with spare pants and underwear? That's what guys would do."

I replied "I really have no idea. Maybe because they would worry that the spare wouldn't match their outfit?"

"Well, blood doesn't match anything!"

But it does make me wonder why we don't do it that way.

Some of us do. :P Back in my early 20s when I would regularly have the Week Of Doom And Despair, I kept spare undies at work and in a ziplock at the bottom of my shoulder bag, and I did not own a single pair of white pants. Everything that I was willing to wear out of the house was black or denim, and wouldn't show damp watermarks if I had to rinse it in a hand basin.  :-[

And I thought I was the only one!

DH asked me what women do when "accidents" happen and I explained that we all become quite good at wetting, blotting and drying our pants - and that it is possible to get them dry enough that you can sit on them until they dry completely and no one is the wiser.  ;)

{For me, it's not "The week of Doom and Despair" but rather my "Stuck Pig Imitation".}

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4835 on: January 22, 2014, 03:11:44 PM »
I guess I should count myself lucky on that regard.  I do keep supplies with me at all times but I haven't had a major incident since grade school.  But then, that's probably because the cramps set in with a vengence before any blood appears.  Gives me lots of warning to get geared up.
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Ontario

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4836 on: January 22, 2014, 08:19:27 PM »
MK - have you thought about having her partially spayed?  If you're not going to breed her, a vet should be able to remove her ovaries, which will stop her from coming into heat.  The vet school at OSU used to do this quite often but I'm not certain on the cost.
We won't even use scissors on her mane, tail, or fetlocks because we want her as "natural" as possible. We're not going to let a scalpel touch her unless absolutely necessary.  She isn't having any health problems caused by her reproductive system.  If it ain't broke, don't fix it.  >:D

Seriously, I bought her as a filly when I hit menopause.  She's the only female in the family with a fully functioning reproductive system. ;)
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Midnight Kitty

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4837 on: January 22, 2014, 08:31:02 PM »
I had a constipation issue and had to be put on medicine for it. This medicine cleaned me out very well! Little did I know that lettuce still looks like lettuce even after hanging out in your colon for days.

So does corn, but everyone know that. ;D
Back when I used to inspect wastewater treatment plants (WWTP), I could always tell when corn was in season: There would be lots of it in the grit chamber.  One can see all kinds of interesting stuff at a WWTP.  For example, it's good to know that our service men are practicing safe sex, but someone should tell them that condoms should not be flushed down the toilet.  They end up caught on the bar screens, floating on the clarifiers, and inflating in the aeration basin like balloons.  Likewise, one can tell when the military are returning from field exercises.  The MREs often cause constipation to the extent that one can see hard turds caught on the bar screens.  Sometimes they are so dense they end up in the grit chamber.

My job has almost as much gross out potential as Vorbau.  Almost, but not quite as much.  Vorbau still rules this thread!
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diesel_darlin

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4838 on: January 23, 2014, 06:33:17 AM »
The mental image of an inflated condom surrounded by corn and turds. Hahaha ;D

Hollanda

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4839 on: January 23, 2014, 08:13:55 AM »
The stench of our bin the last day or so has been particularly rancid, for reasons we couldn't fathom.  I asked DH to please wrack his (admittedly small at times) brain to try and recall something odd he might have put in. He eventually remembered.  This morning.
 
Last night he had put a DS soiled nappy in the kitchen bin rather than take outside and put in the proper bin. In addition to that super duper blooper, he didn't use a nappy sack (which is permeated with something to at least mask the smell) so the lovely rotten stench we've been treated to every time the kitchen bin is opened was something special.
 
I've given DH the task of tonight emptying the kitchen bin and take the bag forthwith out to the main bin (which thankfully gets emptied tomorrow).  I will then need to disinfect the bin and then add some Zoflora to it (a nice-smelling bleachy fluid that keeps drains etc smelling nice).
 
I hope he never does that again.
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VorFemme

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4840 on: January 23, 2014, 08:42:01 AM »
Make him clean it and the lesson will "stick" in his memory longer...
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4841 on: January 23, 2014, 12:51:02 PM »
Make him clean it and the lesson will "stick" in his memory longer...
My thoughts exactly, but you got there first.  :)
« Last Edit: January 23, 2014, 05:59:20 PM by Midnight Kitty »
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit.  The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

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Copper Horsewoman

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4842 on: January 23, 2014, 05:57:39 PM »
From the decapitation thread (ooh, wrong image): I live on the Illinois/Wisconsin border in the US. Snowmobilers running he11 for leather across unfamiliar terrain after dark sometimes find wire fences, dog tie-out lines, clotheslines, etc. at unfortunate heights off the snow surface (around here, can be a meter or more above summer ground level).  Lost a local TV personality this way a few years back.  When I hear the sounds of snowmobiles after dark, I hope they know where they are.
Closer to springtime, snowmobiles find the zillion small but deep lakes, streams and ponds around here by discovering they are not amphibious vehicles.  Enjoy reading about the gross-out scenes that various law enforcement personnel come across in their work, but am profoundly and reverently grateful that these posters do this work, so the rest of us don't have to.
Thank you all twice, once for doing this stuff, and thanks for posting it for us, the morbidly curious.

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4843 on: January 23, 2014, 06:15:42 PM »
Many, many years ago when I was a child, I went with my family to visit my father's cousin who lives in Parker, AZ near the London Bridge and Lake Havasu on the Colorado River.  The day before a man was flying across the water (those jet powered boats barely touch the water) & lost control.  The boat went under a pier and came out without the man's head.

I have an opinionated red mare.  I don't force her to walk through puddles.  I let her pick which side to go around and, if the puddle blocks the road, I let her pick her way through at her own speed.  Going forward is not negotiable, but I'm willing to listen to her choice of the best way forward.  Other horse people at the ranch have told me that I am spoiling her and I should make her walk through puddles.

I asked, "Can you see to the bottom of the puddle?  Do you know how deep it is?  Do you know if there are sharp rocks at the bottom?  No, you don't.  I'll let the horse use her horse sense to get me across safely."

I learned this lesson the hard way when I was 13 and had a little Shetland Pony/Arabian stud colt, both of us without any common sense or fear.  We would gallop down the beach and jump driftwood - bareback (I didn't own a saddle).  Then we jumped what looked like a small log of driftwood, but it turned out to be 3 feet lower on the far side, which we could not see from the approach.  The landing wasn't pretty.  His head went down between his front legs as he tried to catch his balance.  That put me sitting on air, then falling on the sand in front of him.  His back legs came down, one on my left knee and one in the middle of my back.

I couldn't ride for weeks.  He needed to be exercised regularly or he became unruly.  When he trampled the dog belonging to the people who were boarding him, he was given his walking papers and I had to sell him.  Probably for the best as I was entering high school and needed to concentrate on my school work instead of spending every waking minute thinking about my pony.  Don't feel sorry for him: He ended up being the stud for a herd of 200 mares owned by a man who provided ponies for the carnival kiddy pony rides.  Yep, not even 4 years old and retired to a 1,000 acres and 200 mares.
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit.  The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

Marcus Aurelius

Ms_Cellany

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Re: Gross out-- Not for the faint of heart
« Reply #4844 on: January 23, 2014, 06:35:36 PM »
The boat went under a pier and came out without the man's head.

I have an opinionated red mare.  I don't force her to walk through puddles. 

I was just WAITING to see what the connection between these two sentences was.
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