Raggedy Ann goes to a wedding ...

[KenveeB]

I'm more of a guy's girl most of the time and don't go for a lot of fancy hair and make-up stuff, though I've slowly learned to do more because it's expected for a "polished" appearance in my job. But for something like a wedding, I've had fun getting a fancier do than I would ever manage on my own. Just let the stylist know that your usual style is pretty simple, and let her take it from there. She'll be experienced with a variety of people and preferences and should be able to come up with something you'll be comfortable in that's still fun and fab! Firecat's right that you'll want a little heavier makeup than ordinary anyway just because of all the photos, so trust the stylist.

[Hmmmmm]

Oh, and one other suggstion is to have your dress or a picture of your dress with you so she has an idea on color selections and hair styles that will suit.

I know someone else suggested not shampoing your hair that day. I get this instruction everytime and I ignore it everytime. I'm one of those people who shampoes daily. If I skip, my head feels greasy and itchy. My DD is the same way. We never have a problem with our style working or staying. I mean it won't still be up the next day, but it definately stays through the night. So if missing a shampoo will bother you, it won't be the end of the world if you go in with clean hair. Just try to shampoo and dry a few hours before she is trying to do a style.

[KenveeB]

I know someone else suggested not shampoing your hair that day. I get this instruction everytime and I ignore it everytime. I'm one of those people who shampoes daily. If I skip, my head feels greasy and itchy. My DD is the same way. We never have a problem with our style working or staying. I mean it won't still be up the next day, but it definately stays through the night. So if missing a shampoo will bother you, it won't be the end of the world if you go in with clean hair. Just try to shampoo and dry a few hours before she is trying to do a style.

I'm the same way, so I try to wash my hair the night before, or even the afternoon before if I can. That way I don't get the greasy feeling, but the hair has had a little time to build up its natural oils to make the style easier.

[BeagleMommy]

Bring pictures of styles that you might like.  Tell the hair stylist "I want something that's not overly fussy and doesn't require a lot of hairspray".  I would recommend a sleek ponytail, a chignon or a French twist.

As far as the make up goes, be sure to tell the make up artist that you don't normally wear make up and that you don't want to wear any mascara.  Ask her to keep the make up clean, simple and natural.

[rose red]

It's important that you make it clear you want natural looking makeup.  I like the idea of bringing in a magazine picture.  Bring a hand mirror to watch the process.

One time I went to a makeover event and informed them I like natural; like I'm not even wearing anything at all.  They made me look like a Kardashian, only worse.  If I had a mirror, I would have stopped them early on.

[Bijou]

I love the idea that your sibling is including your mom and you in the makeup and hair stylist part of it.  So many times people are feeling bad and overlooked.      

About the hair, my hair is long and I always wear it down and straight, no fussing at all.  It seems to me you could let the stylist know that you want a pony tail, but a fancy dressed up one.  Or she could turn it into some kind of bun or something with little fancies woven into it.  I like the idea of bringing a picture, too.  If you don't want them cutting it or anything you probably have to be clear about that.
As for the make-up, I would hate communal makeup.  I would bring my own, but that's just me.

[jmarvellous]

I just got my wedding hair and makeup done, and paid for my mom and sister to have "blow outs" (cheaper and simpler than the more elaborate "up-do" with me. They both basically got their hair blown as smooth as it would go, then got some big curls/waves added. I think my sister brought this picture with her, and she wound up with something similar, just a bit curlier: http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2008/database/whitneyport/whitney_port300a.jpg

Here's the same woman with a 'fancy' ponytail:  http://www2.pictures.stylebistro.com/gi/Whitney+Port+Long+Hairstyles+Ponytail+dCAtwGQ8ip8l.jpg

As far as makeup, they have everything they need and can go natural or bold as you like! You can do your own mascara, but it isn't as awkward as it seems with a pro doing it. They can handle blinking!

[pinkiu]

For hair you could ask for some type of pony tail updo since you wear your hair that way. Or you could have a beautiful waterfall braid. I was a makeup artist for years and pros sterilize brushes, etc. between people. I had a special brush cleaner, used disposable mascara wands, scraped off any lipstick I would use so that the tube didn't actually touch people. Same with gloss, I had a plastic palate that I used for that. Just tell the artist that you want a natural look. If you don't normally wear lip color, eye liner and mascara, this might be the day you tolerate it so that your face shows up in photos. However, you don't need lots of color on the eyes or bright cheeks.

[Firecat]

For hair you could ask for some type of pony tail updo since you wear your hair that way. Or you could have a beautiful waterfall braid. I was a makeup artist for years and pros sterilize brushes, etc. between people. I had a special brush cleaner, used disposable mascara wands, scraped off any lipstick I would use so that the tube didn't actually touch people. Same with gloss, I had a plastic palate that I used for that. Just tell the artist that you want a natural look. If you don't normally wear lip color, eye liner and mascara, this might be the day you tolerate it so that your face shows up in photos. However, you don't need lots of color on the eyes or bright cheeks.

This. Another option would be to ask the artist to emphasize one feature a bit more - eyes or lips, for example. So there might be more or a brighter/deeper color on that particular feature, and the rest would be pretty neutral. I tend to like to go with emphasizing my eyes, especially since I wear glasses, so emphasizing my eyes means they don't disappear behind the glasses.

[elephantschild]

OP, back online! Thank you so much for all the advice. I felt a little self-conscious after typing that out, like "Geez, I hope I'm not the only one who feels that way!"

Part of the problem with the hair was that I'm so, err, hair-ignorant that I wasn't sure what words to use to describe what I wanted/didn't want. And I looked at some photos online, but I couldn't figure out if any of them would actually work with the hair I have.

You've all given my some good words and phrases to use. Thank you! I'm also willing to step a bit outside of my comfort zone for this, but I'm trying to figure out how best to do this.

My SIL-to-be (and her family) are wonderful people. Going a bit outside that zone is the least I can do for someone who makes little brother so happy.

[jpcher]

I didn't have anything to add when I read this thread earlier, there was already a lot of great advice.


I just want to say that with your update, elephantschild, your thoughtfulness and attitude about posting and wanting to do the right thing is outstanding.

It sounds like your little brother is marrying into a wonderful group of people.



Enjoy the day! Go a bit wild for once! and Share the Love.

[ladyknight1]

I keep my hair pretty simple and only wear makeup once a week or less. However, I love dressing up and changing my style.

Have fun!

[TootsNYC]

I think you can say - "I usually am most comfortable with a ponytail so probably something simple and elegant" and "I don't wear much makeup and don't like much around my eyes so probably something simple"

I like this.


It's an opportunity to do something fancier, to push yourself out of your narrow comfort zone.

But you don't want to go SO FAR out of your comfort zone that you don't enjoy it.

(there are some very dressy ponytails.)

So if mascara really bothers you, tell them you don't want to use it. And give them some guidance.