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Author Topic: Dear Dog:  (Read 296263 times)

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #210 on: February 05, 2011, 06:49:38 AM »
Dear Bob,

Please don't pretend you haven't been fed yet when Papa has already taken care of you. You might like a double breakfast, but I don't like the mess that ensues (you'd think you'd learn after the first time). Either Papa will tell me, or your tummy will, sometime in the afternoon-it's futile to think I won't find out,

your exasperated mother


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #211 on: February 05, 2011, 10:25:48 AM »
Bob could be related to Mr. O's dog, Lucky. She will sit and beg at her food dish even after one person has fed her, because the whole family is normally in and out so its easy for no one to know who has fed the dog.

Mr. O even has a whole joke routine down about how she will later write in her dog diary about double food.
‘All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing’  attributed to Edmund Burke 1729-1797


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #212 on: February 05, 2011, 03:49:39 PM »
That's too funny! Smart aren't they? Yesterday DH called out 'I fed the dog' right after I already put the food in Bob's dish and he was chowing down. Uh-oh, too late.  ;D Tricky little devil.


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #213 on: February 05, 2011, 04:05:20 PM »
you need to get a magnet like the dishwasher ones that say "washed/dirty" on them only

dog has been fed
dog has not been fed

and a metal dog dish to put it on

of course then the little smart pup will figure out how to turn it around......
Reality is for people who lack Imagination


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #214 on: February 05, 2011, 04:31:42 PM »
Dear PC (Princess Complex):

I'm not sure whether I should be impressed or not that you associate bathrooms with "where I attend to nature's call." But seriously, stepping on one of your "presents" when I go into MY bathroom to brush my teeth or wash up is getting seriously on my nerves!


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #215 on: February 05, 2011, 04:37:20 PM »
Dear PeytieDog,

I understand that you think dirty underwear is the best.toy.evar. But you have to wait until I take it OFF to chew it up. Running into the bathroom, grabbing it with your teeth, and attempting to tug it off of my legs while I am using the toilet will get bad results for both of us. Also, I am starting to feel a little creeped out when you watch me get undressed because you know underpants are forthcoming. Do we need to go to doggie counseling to resolve this fetish?

Thank heavens I'm not the only one!


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #216 on: February 05, 2011, 08:16:40 PM »
^Oh my... :o *rolls around laughing* That is creepy, yet utterly hilarious. :D

On a similar note...

Dear Max,

It is quite adorable that you like to come into the bathroom with me. On the other hand, the standing there and watching me intently is disturbing. As is the fact that as soon as I get up, you are instantly over there, sniffing at the toilet. I don't want to know what that's about.
"And neither the angels in heaven above, nor the demons down under the sea can ever dissever my soul from the soul of the beautiful Annabel Lee"


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #217 on: July 09, 2011, 10:30:16 PM »
Dear Yogi and Tessie,

I know it's dark. They call it night for a reason. Did you have to bark last night *right* as I was falling asleep? I'm sorry I left the light off....

(seriously, I was juuuusssstttt about to fall asleep last night when they started barking. Had to turn the entry light on for them to shut up)

NE Florida


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #218 on: July 10, 2011, 07:05:32 AM »
Dear Susie:

I know you associate me with tummy rubs. I love to give you tummy rubs, but please don't flop over on your side in the middle of a major foot traffic area. We don't want to be held responsible when someone falls and hurts themselves, do we?


Your human cousin


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #219 on: July 11, 2011, 01:01:25 PM »
Dear Harley, my friends neurotic german shepard,

For the love of all that's holy, please quit breaking windows at your parents home.  You have already knocked an entire window out of the frame, and now have damaged the front glass panel door by adding a very large crack into it.  You also scared the post man so bad your parents had to put in a new mailbox away from the house.  No, the people walking across the street are not dangerous, they are just out for a walk.  They have already invested in a electronic fence and collar to keep you away from the rest of the windows, had to by you a shock collar as well, and now your mom just told me she had to schedule another training session.  So please quit costing them money that could be spent on toys for you if you would behave.

Sanity Lost

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #220 on: July 11, 2011, 01:49:09 PM »
Dear Ms Daisy,

Please stop eating the boys dirty underwear; it is getting very disconcerting. Also there is a reason we lock up the cat's litter box from you and no she doesn't want to play with you. Yes, I will get you more tennis balls as soon as I have the money from replacing all the underwear. In the meantime you still have plenty in the back yard to play with.

Love Mom


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #221 on: July 11, 2011, 06:23:27 PM »
Dear Big Dog,

The water in the cat's little dish is for the cat, which it is why it is next to his dish.

It is the same tap water that is in your big giant dog dish.  It is not some rare delicacy.

It's H2O.


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #222 on: July 12, 2011, 07:43:27 PM »
Dear Maui,

Although I do love waking up with you snuggling against me. When I wake up and you are THISCLOSE to me that in fact, your snout is actually resting on my face, that my dear dog, its a bit disconcerting.....

I know you love me, but please, no more sleeping on my face??? In fact, whenever you sleep with your head on my pillow and breath onto me, just dont do that anymore either too please?? :)



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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #223 on: July 12, 2011, 08:53:24 PM »
Love this thread!!!

Dear Ms. Jasmine,

When mommy does sit-ups it is not helpful for you to stand over her with your big Weim ears hanging down and your snout in her face.  It makes mommy laugh and she  has to stop the crunches. On a related note, it hurts when you stand on her ponytail as she tries to sit up. Thank you. 


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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #224 on: July 12, 2011, 09:09:38 PM »
Dear Dog,

You do not need to bark at the ice cream truck. Trust me, the cute little tune alerted me to its presence. Or are you notifying me that you want ice cream?  :D

P.S. Your farts stink.