Author Topic: Dear Dog:  (Read 86124 times)

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mbbored

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #585 on: October 11, 2013, 12:43:45 AM »
Dear Falcor,

I know you think that sleeping on my bed is your right. And it's very sweet that you want to sleep on my feet, plus it keeps my toes very cozy during these cold nights. But honestly, you should know by now that I always roll over during the night. There's no need to dramatically jump and bark every time I do that.

Love,
Me

Lady Snowdon

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #586 on: October 11, 2013, 07:41:00 AM »
Dear Smokey,

You have an assigned spot on the bed.  Please make use of it!  Wandering all over the bed looking for the perfect spot while I'm trying to fall asleep is very annoying.  Just lay down and go to sleep dog. 

Love,

Your sleepy owner

readingchick

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #587 on: October 11, 2013, 08:02:13 AM »
Dear Eddie,

I love you bunches, but did you really have to use me as a launch pad to help you jump off the bed this morning? I don't think I like that!


Your sissy

mmswm

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #588 on: October 11, 2013, 10:13:39 AM »
Dear Baxter, Sammy and Lucy,

The tractors and golf carts aren't going anywhere.  They pass by the property hundreds of times a day.  You should be used to this by now.  There's no need to chase every single one of them while barking at top volume. Thankfully the nursery workers have figured out that you're all bark and no bite as long as they stay on their side of the fence, but it's still annoying.

Love,
Mum.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

greencat

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #589 on: October 13, 2013, 10:48:19 PM »
Dear Rocky,

I'm sorry that the kitties like your new food better than theirs.  Thank you for not trying to eat the kitties who had their heads in your food bowl.  You're such a good dog.

However, I would, once again, like to place a moratorium on farting in the A/C vent.

Love,

The provider of noms.

andi

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #590 on: October 14, 2013, 10:03:19 PM »

I told your Daddy that we should give up on bathroom rugs and just use old, thick towels that can be tossed in the laundry ... or trash.


Walmart has 'Kitchen Rugs' in the kitchen section - they don't have the placticized back, and are fully washable.  I prefer something I can toss in the wash on occasion :)

I used stuff called "Pet-zyme" from Petsmart and it works great on the smell and stain.

Bed Bath has bath rugs that are fabric on both sides and wash like a dream - I gave several of them.

Some towel collections have bath mats, like heavy duty towels.  Very washable, although you will still need to pre-soak urine stains with an enzyme cleaner like Natures Miracle.

Signed,

Owner of a cat with emotional issues

jedikaiti

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #591 on: October 14, 2013, 10:14:36 PM »
Dear Falcor,

I know you think that sleeping on my bed is your right. And it's very sweet that you want to sleep on my feet, plus it keeps my toes very cozy during these cold nights. But honestly, you should know by now that I always roll over during the night. There's no need to dramatically jump and bark every time I do that.

Love,
Me

OK, I must ask... what breed is Falcor?
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

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greencat

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #592 on: October 15, 2013, 06:06:54 PM »
Dear Falcor,

I know you think that sleeping on my bed is your right. And it's very sweet that you want to sleep on my feet, plus it keeps my toes very cozy during these cold nights. But honestly, you should know by now that I always roll over during the night. There's no need to dramatically jump and bark every time I do that.

Love,
Me

OK, I must ask... what breed is Falcor?

Dragon.

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Dear Dog
« Reply #593 on: October 15, 2013, 07:17:38 PM »
Dear Eddie,

I love you bunches, but did you really have to use me as a launch pad to help you jump off the bed this morning? I don't think I like that!


Your sissy
We say Honey Girl is "spring loaded."  I swear that little 13 pound dog can jump 3 feet vertically and 5 feet horizontally.  It does not feel good when she uses your bare thighs for her launch pad.  She leaves little "toe pukas*."


*Puka = hole
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Marcus Aurelius

mmswm

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #594 on: October 15, 2013, 08:03:25 PM »
Dear Baxter,

It's a log, not a stick.  We are not a sawdust plant.  Just saying.

Also, you are a 145 pound mastiff, not a 10 pound jack russel. Jumping 8 feet into the air on your back legs in order to chase a squirrel up a tree is not good on your back hips. 

Love,
the amused one.
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

greencat

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #595 on: October 15, 2013, 08:59:08 PM »
Dear Rocky,

Thank you for not barking back at the yapping chorus in the other yards.  However, please do not dig under the fence to go visit with the other doggies.  Mommy will not be a happy camper if I have to go extract you from someone else's yard.  You were way, way, way too excited at the fence today.

Love,

Mommy

mbbored

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #596 on: October 15, 2013, 09:13:29 PM »
Dear Falcor,

I know you think that sleeping on my bed is your right. And it's very sweet that you want to sleep on my feet, plus it keeps my toes very cozy during these cold nights. But honestly, you should know by now that I always roll over during the night. There's no need to dramatically jump and bark every time I do that.

Love,
Me

OK, I must ask... what breed is Falcor?

Dragon.

Excellent guess.  ;)

For those who don't embrace his more magical side, the SPCA said he's half spaniel/half shepherd. Based on how he looks, I'd say the spaniel half is clumber spaniel and the shepherd half is Australian shepherd. His face looks just like the original Falcor's and he's got a slightly long torso for his legs.

Nikko-chan

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #597 on: October 17, 2013, 07:21:29 AM »
Dear Falcor,

I know you think that sleeping on my bed is your right. And it's very sweet that you want to sleep on my feet, plus it keeps my toes very cozy during these cold nights. But honestly, you should know by now that I always roll over during the night. There's no need to dramatically jump and bark every time I do that.

Love,
Me

OK, I must ask... what breed is Falcor?

Dragon.

Excellent guess.  ;)

For those who don't embrace his more magical side, the SPCA said he's half spaniel/half shepherd. Based on how he looks, I'd say the spaniel half is clumber spaniel and the shepherd half is Australian shepherd. His face looks just like the original Falcor's and he's got a slightly long torso for his legs.

Ahem. I vote for you dressing him up as a dragon for halloween.

Winterlight

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #598 on: October 17, 2013, 11:19:25 AM »
Dear Annabellle,

I am very fond of you, but not so much when you attempt to hurl yourself under the feet of passing joggers.

Love,

The dogsitter who likes having you as a lapdog
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To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
Caroline Lake Ingalls

Lady Snowdon

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #599 on: October 17, 2013, 05:13:01 PM »
Dear Smokey,

I apologize for all the people who were in our yard and making noises yesterday and today.  I know that causes lots of anxiety for you, and you were really a good boy about keeping the freaking out and woofing to a minimum.  Everyone is gone now, and there's no more work to be done on the house at the moment, so you can come out of hiding now, okay?  And go back to curling up on the rug in the living room.

Love,
Your person

PS - you somehow managed to pee on your leash and your bird within the space of a single 24 hour period.  Please stop, as the people do not have the resources to replace all your gear!