You're welcome, Nikko-chan, I've a lot of them up my sleeves...and really big sleeves
When you found your first animal part in the great mountains of Colorado, you stayed 50 yards away from us, staring as we tried to call you with the deer leg dangling from your mouth. I then figured out why you were avoiding us: you were afraid we would yell at you for your catch. I told you what a good girl you were and your tail immediately started going; I thought you were going to shake off it. A few more, "Good girls!" and you came running towards us, deer leg flopping about; then you pranced around proudly and went to lie down to enjoy your prize and just how satisfied you were with yourself that Momma and Daddy were proud of you.
Since then, you have brought home 5 other animal parts. You know I draw the line at bringing them in the house, and Daddy won't touch them to move them, but for the love of nature, will you please
stop leaving them on the porch where, when I come outside to tell you to stop baring at the cows at 4 in the morning still mostly asleep and without my glasses on, I step on them? That would be much, much
Alright, Goober, Jambon, Hambone, DumDum, et cetera, listen up. There will be plenty of people here to pet you in the next couple of days. That does not mean that they are required to pet you, so when they don't, don't come pouting to me and require extra attention. I love you, but I see you every day. Daddy and I both know you're a momma's boy, but you don't have to hang from my apron strings just because people aren't petting you. It gets hard to walk with 100+ pounds constantly leaning on me and following me.