Author Topic: Dear Dog:  (Read 83944 times)

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jedikaiti

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #570 on: August 15, 2013, 03:28:15 PM »
Dear Mom,

You name me Pilsner and expect me to not be interested in the beer?

Pilsner

Dear Pilsner,

If you recall, your Dad is the one who named you. And you're still too young to drink.

Mom
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

jedikaiti

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #571 on: August 15, 2013, 03:29:47 PM »
Valentine answered to: "Stop, get back here!" when she was a tiny puppy.

I accidentally trained Pilsner to sit in front of me when I said "who loves the puppy?" I didn't realize it, but I was saying that every time I gave him a treat. Then once I said it out of context and he came and sat. Then later, as a test, DH said it while standing across the yard from me. Pilsner came to me and sat.
What part of v_e = \sqrt{\frac{2GM}{r}} don't you understand? It's only rocket science!

"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

GreenHall

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #572 on: August 15, 2013, 03:39:09 PM »

I told your Daddy that we should give up on bathroom rugs and just use old, thick towels that can be tossed in the laundry ... or trash.


Walmart has 'Kitchen Rugs' in the kitchen section - they don't have the placticized back, and are fully washable.  I prefer something I can toss in the wash on occasion :)

momof2weenies

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #573 on: August 15, 2013, 03:52:44 PM »
Dearest BabyDog:

The oatmeal in the tub is to help with my hives.  It is not "mom-flavored oatmeal" for you to try to drink.

And no, the "poor me" face will not work on me this time.



No, seriously, it won't work.  Stop it.
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magicdomino

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #574 on: August 15, 2013, 04:04:41 PM »

I told your Daddy that we should give up on bathroom rugs and just use old, thick towels that can be tossed in the laundry ... or trash.


Walmart has 'Kitchen Rugs' in the kitchen section - they don't have the placticized back, and are fully washable.  I prefer something I can toss in the wash on occasion :)

Some towel collections have bath mats, like heavy duty towels.  Very washable, although you will still need to pre-soak urine stains with an enzyme cleaner like Natures Miracle.

Signed,

Owner of a cat with emotional issues

Midnight Kitty

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #575 on: August 15, 2013, 04:45:25 PM »

I told your Daddy that we should give up on bathroom rugs and just use old, thick towels that can be tossed in the laundry ... or trash.


Walmart has 'Kitchen Rugs' in the kitchen section - they don't have the placticized back, and are fully washable.  I prefer something I can toss in the wash on occasion :)

Some towel collections have bath mats, like heavy duty towels.  Very washable, although you will still need to pre-soak urine stains with an enzyme cleaner like Natures Miracle.

Signed,

Owner of a cat with emotional issues
I have Nature's Miracle hard surface cleaner because our floors are tile and laminate.  Do you think I could use it on the rug?
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit.  The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."

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magicdomino

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #576 on: August 15, 2013, 05:34:18 PM »
Check the label, but it should work.

MissRose

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #577 on: August 17, 2013, 04:46:34 PM »
Daisy, Diva, and Duke,

Thank you for being such good dogs during my visit to my cousin.  But I was not too fond of the bits of slobber when I pet you.

I just wished I could have gotten you all dog treats but good thing I did not as my cousin warned me your gas is bad when you eat certain things!

Daisy,

No you are not my cousin's hubby's 2nd wife.  Get over it LOL.  Go sleep elsewhere!

Love from Cousin Rose


Winterlight

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #578 on: August 17, 2013, 07:08:08 PM »

I told your Daddy that we should give up on bathroom rugs and just use old, thick towels that can be tossed in the laundry ... or trash.


Walmart has 'Kitchen Rugs' in the kitchen section - they don't have the placticized back, and are fully washable.  I prefer something I can toss in the wash on occasion :)

Some towel collections have bath mats, like heavy duty towels.  Very washable, although you will still need to pre-soak urine stains with an enzyme cleaner like Natures Miracle.

Signed,

Owner of a cat with emotional issues
I have Nature's Miracle hard surface cleaner because our floors are tile and laminate.  Do you think I could use it on the rug?

I'd look for the carpet version, personally. It's great stuff- my friend had a sheltie with a leak problem and this got rid of both odor and stains on her pretty pink rugs.
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Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
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Dr. F.

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #579 on: August 26, 2013, 06:22:26 PM »
Dear Angel,

I'm so happy that, as a new little foster dog who had been a Puppy Mill br*eder for 12 years, that you've warmed up and come out of your shell to join me and the rest of the pack. It's so cute to see you learn how to be a dog and run outside and play, not to mention snuggle with me on the sofa! You'll turn into a little lap dog yet, sweetie.

And I'm really happy that you've decided to like your foster brothers and sister, even though they're 4x your size, and you can run under their bellies without touching. I know you'd really like your foster brother Lucas to play with you, since he looks most like you. It'd be good for him. But, sweetie, you need to think about your relative heights when nipping him to get him to play. Let's face it, the only place you can reach are, frankly, his dangly bits. Admittedly, he's had some of said bits removed, but, well, boys still don't like having their bits nipped. That's just not the best way to convince him to play with you.

Mommy

misha412

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #580 on: August 26, 2013, 08:43:25 PM »
Dear Angel,

I'm so happy that, as a new little foster dog who had been a Puppy Mill br*eder for 12 years, that you've warmed up and come out of your shell to join me and the rest of the pack. It's so cute to see you learn how to be a dog and run outside and play, not to mention snuggle with me on the sofa! You'll turn into a little lap dog yet, sweetie.

And I'm really happy that you've decided to like your foster brothers and sister, even though they're 4x your size, and you can run under their bellies without touching. I know you'd really like your foster brother Lucas to play with you, since he looks most like you. It'd be good for him. But, sweetie, you need to think about your relative heights when nipping him to get him to play. Let's face it, the only place you can reach are, frankly, his dangly bits. Admittedly, he's had some of said bits removed, but, well, boys still don't like having their bits nipped. That's just not the best way to convince him to play with you.

Mommy

Dear Angel,

Glad you got out of that br*eder place. My mom rescued me from a shelter. You will learn to love good humans and other doggies. (ask your foster mom or dad about peanut butter...it's the bestest thing ever invented by humans).

And to the bolded above,  :o Your foster is right about that. Don't nip my dangly bits or I gets mad.

Your furry pal, Dagan D. Doggy

Julian

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #581 on: August 26, 2013, 08:56:18 PM »
Dear Molly and Suzi

Until the alarm goes off in the morning, or I sit up and say Hello Ladies, please DO NOT:

  • Jump onto my full bladder

    Wash my face till I can't breathe

    Walk all over me

    Bark at me to get up.

This is new behaviour and I am not very fond of it.  Remember who buys the treaties.  Also remember it is actually my bed, not our bed.

Love

The grumpy one with ruched bags under the eyes.

Julian

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #582 on: September 03, 2013, 10:36:01 PM »
Dear Molly

How on earth did I end up with a dog that hurks up hairballs?  That's a cat thing.

Love
Mum (the cleaner of said hurks)

MissRose

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #583 on: October 10, 2013, 03:00:42 PM »
Dear Molly

How on earth did I end up with a dog that hurks up hairballs?  That's a cat thing.

Love
Mum (the cleaner of said hurks)


I had no idea dogs could do that like cats do!!!!

Julian

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Re: Dear Dog:
« Reply #584 on: October 10, 2013, 08:22:14 PM »
Neither did I!  She is an obsessive groomer, and ends up chewing up wads of fur.  It then has to go somewhere.  Erk.