Dear dogrug:
While it may not be painful for you when the cats walk on you, I assure you, that since I outweigh you, it would be incredibly bad if I were to do the same thing. Therefore, perhaps you could be so kind as to not sleep in the parts of the house that I walk through the most? Also, since you let the cats literally walk all over you, I'm taking your dog card away.
Love,
The treat dispenser