News: IT'S THE 2ND ANNUAL GUATEMALA LIBRARY PROJECT BOOK DRIVE!    LOOKING FOR DONATIONS OF SCIENCE BOOKS THIS YEAR.    Check it out in the "Extending the Hand of Kindness" folder or here: http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=139832.msg3372084#msg3372084   

  • November 24, 2017, 02:40:28 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Author Topic: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat  (Read 662640 times)

1 Member and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

PastryGoddess

  • Member
  • Posts: 6374
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1665 on: June 18, 2014, 03:24:50 AM »
Dear Wall-E,

You sure gave me a major fright.  I came home last night and you were nowhere to be found.  I went to bed having still not found you.  I woke up this morning and found you taking a nap in the sunshine.  Please to not be hiding like that again?

Love,

The zookeeper.

*As an addendum, I had no such trouble locating the other two kittens, as they glued themselves to me when I got back home.

The catnip shake brings cats out of the woodwork in my home

Trying to store catnip in my house requires one of those bear-proof boxes.  I used to store it in the fridge, but one of them learned how to open that!

I have a little container with a screw on lid.  they have no clue how to open it.  I have to be careful when moving it as any sound it makes will cause 3 cats to harass me immediately

greencat

  • Member
  • Posts: 3899
  • Trap...Neuter...What was that third thing again?
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1666 on: June 18, 2014, 04:38:35 AM »
Dear Wall-E,

You sure gave me a major fright.  I came home last night and you were nowhere to be found.  I went to bed having still not found you.  I woke up this morning and found you taking a nap in the sunshine.  Please to not be hiding like that again?

Love,

The zookeeper.

*As an addendum, I had no such trouble locating the other two kittens, as they glued themselves to me when I got back home.

The catnip shake brings cats out of the woodwork in my home

Trying to store catnip in my house requires one of those bear-proof boxes.  I used to store it in the fridge, but one of them learned how to open that!

I have a little container with a screw on lid.  they have no clue how to open it.  I have to be careful when moving it as any sound it makes will cause 3 cats to harass me immediately

Ah.  My cats deal with screw-on lidded containers by beating them against the floor until the container warps or cracks enough for the lid to come off.

imrowr

  • Member
  • Posts: 32
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1667 on: June 18, 2014, 05:02:06 AM »
Dear Wall-E,

You sure gave me a major fright.  I came home last night and you were nowhere to be found.  I went to bed having still not found you.  I woke up this morning and found you taking a nap in the sunshine.  Please to not be hiding like that again?

Love,

The zookeeper.

*As an addendum, I had no such trouble locating the other two kittens, as they glued themselves to me when I got back home.

The catnip shake brings cats out of the woodwork in my home

How wrong is it that when I read PastryGoddess's response, the first thing that popped into my head was, "The catnip shake brings all the boys to the yard"?  ;D

ladyknight1

  • Member
  • Posts: 11913
  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1668 on: June 18, 2014, 08:04:37 AM »
My nip is better than theirs.  >:D
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

JadeAngel

  • Member
  • Posts: 516
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1669 on: June 18, 2014, 10:03:44 PM »
I could nip you, but I'd have to charge  ;)

PastryGoddess

  • Member
  • Posts: 6374
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1670 on: June 19, 2014, 01:50:20 AM »
Oh dear...what have I started :D

atirial

  • Member
  • Posts: 3412
  • just 'plane mad
    • Tirial & Errror blog
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1671 on: June 20, 2014, 12:09:02 PM »
Dear Matilda,

I know your brother gets his stitches out today. Dad (human slave #2) is with him at the vet at the moment. This does not mean you need to fill in to keep me busy. I have quite enough on my plate at the moment.

Specifically I never want to utter the phrase: "Good grief, you've got cat litter in your eye!" again. Nor could I have done with your determination to escape the wet tissue of doom and keep the litter there. It's not good for you.

And to add insult to injury, right after being a swearing, blending, mincer of death while you are being cleaned, you then realise it feels much better clean, purr, headbump mummy, and wander off to lick yourself. That does not make me stop bleeding.
 
Regards,
Mummy.

ladyknight1

  • Member
  • Posts: 11913
  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1672 on: June 20, 2014, 03:17:51 PM »
Dear Harley,

I know you love your dad. I know you love to go outside. You really should stop spending 20+ minutes meowing at the top of your lungs before your dad comes inside.

He can't hear you. There will be earplugs involved tonight.

Mom
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

mmswm

  • Member
  • Posts: 2230
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1673 on: June 20, 2014, 07:47:46 PM »
Dear stray kitty,

How on earth did you manage to make friends with the cat hating mastiff in the yard? That took some serious determination! Next time you cuddle up with him, would you please stay put long enough for me to take a picture?

Love,
The mastiff's mom.

Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

greencat

  • Member
  • Posts: 3899
  • Trap...Neuter...What was that third thing again?
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1674 on: June 20, 2014, 08:09:58 PM »
Dear stray kitty,

How on earth did you manage to make friends with the cat hating mastiff in the yard? That took some serious determination! Next time you cuddle up with him, would you please stay put long enough for me to take a picture?

Love,
The mastiff's mom.

Dear mastiff's mom,

You needed a cat to go with the dog.

Love,
Cat Central

JoW

  • Member
  • Posts: 1113
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1675 on: June 20, 2014, 09:07:06 PM »
Dear stray kitty,

How on earth did you manage to make friends with the cat hating mastiff in the yard? That took some serious determination! Next time you cuddle up with him, would you please stay put long enough for me to take a picture?

Love,
The mastiff's mom.

Congratulations on your new cat.  Have you picked a name yet? 

Mad Goat Woman

  • formerly Hamlet: The Original Emo
  • Member
  • Posts: 801
    • Mad Goat Woman
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1676 on: June 21, 2014, 05:48:58 AM »
Dear Ghostie Grey

Why, oh why, when I was trying to bring you back inside, did you dig your claws into my right shoulder?

The working dogs wouldn't have hurt you.

Love,
Your human mum.

Captains Flat, Australia

Fliss

  • Member
  • Posts: 326
  • Australia - the land that time forgot.
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1677 on: June 21, 2014, 08:18:17 PM »

Dear Cat Central (Australasia division):

Please send me a cat. Black if you can manage it. Small kitten size for preference, so it can beat up the Demons.

We have a rodent issue with the Bucklets and I don't want to use baits.

Thank you
Good news! Your insurance company says they'll cover you. Unfortunately, they also say it will be with dirt.

Nikko-chan

  • Member
  • Posts: 3379
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1678 on: June 24, 2014, 12:13:45 AM »
Dear Ciaran:

When you lick your fur to get clean (cats are fastidious about this, I know) you do not have to slurp and glurp on your fur. You really don't. Its not gentlemanly. Please to be stopping with that!

Sincerely,

Your grossed out slave.

P.S. Don't you huff at me mister! I have the treaties. *nods*

ladyknight1

  • Member
  • Posts: 11913
  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1679 on: June 24, 2014, 07:54:07 AM »
^Mocha does that and has since she was a wee little kitten.

Dear Harley,

I am very sorry your human father has gotten you into the habit of going outside for wet food. You running out when I was leaving yesterday made me very late for work, since I can't leave you out there as you are slow and stubborn and people over here are crazy.

I'm sorry you would not allow me to catch you until I started my vehicle and then you ran inside.

Your father is in major trouble over this.

Love,

Mom
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien