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  • November 19, 2017, 06:11:27 PM

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Author Topic: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat  (Read 658318 times)

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ladyknight1

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  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1770 on: September 05, 2014, 03:21:12 PM »
I confirmed this when it rang a few minutes later from a very confused DH. He played me the message when he got back: two minutes of heavy purring, rubbing noises, and then me asking what you are doing with my phone. And having heard it, I am so very glad you didn't call anyone else.

For what it's worth... that is one awesome call. I would have squeed so loudly it probably would have made Stephen jump to the ceiling.


Dear cat,
I'll help you get out of my formerly freshly laundered shirt as soon as I can stop laughing at the sight of you trying to get out by yourself.

This had me laughing so hard. Thank you.
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

greencat

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1771 on: September 05, 2014, 04:38:36 PM »
Dear Coffee Bean,

Sleeping in the center of the back does not encourage me to get up and feed you any earlier in the morning.  If anything, it has the exact opposite effect.  You are far too light to perform the heavy-cat squishing that I think you're trying to do.

Thank you,
The management.

Cutenoob

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1772 on: September 05, 2014, 06:24:52 PM »
Dear Ivory,

I love it when you snuggle to sleep with me, you are so warm. But please do a better job of cleaning your behind. Having stinky-butt in my face means you get a wipe down, and cannot sleep on the bed. And it also means you're going to get a potty cut very very soon.

Thank you,
The human who insulted you.


ladyknight1

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1773 on: September 05, 2014, 08:38:12 PM »
Dear Harley,

You are old. I know that you are old. You are 16, and that is old for a kitty. However, please don't think that we forget to feed you. You get gushy food twice a day and grain free dry food all the time. You won't get forgotten.

Promise.

Love,

Mom
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

The TARDIS

  • I wanted to see the Universe so I stole a Time Lord and I ran away.
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  • I'm bigger on the inside!
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1774 on: September 06, 2014, 01:45:46 PM »
Dear Stormageddon,

Laying so your tail is on my face while I'm asleep is not fun. I do not like waking up with your fur in my eyes, nose and mouth. I'm aware you're proud of how fluffy and black you are, but I can appreciate it without having it enter my bodily orifices!

Love,

The Food Dispenser
Who is the Doctor?

Nikko-chan

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1775 on: September 06, 2014, 07:37:07 PM »
Dear Stormageddon,

Laying so your tail is on my face while I'm asleep is not fun. I do not like waking up with your fur in my eyes, nose and mouth. I'm aware you're proud of how fluffy and black you are, but I can appreciate it without having it enter my bodily orifices!

Love,

The Food Dispenser

You named your kitty stormageddon?!

greencat

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1776 on: September 06, 2014, 08:36:19 PM »
Dear Stormageddon,

Laying so your tail is on my face while I'm asleep is not fun. I do not like waking up with your fur in my eyes, nose and mouth. I'm aware you're proud of how fluffy and black you are, but I can appreciate it without having it enter my bodily orifices!

Love,

The Food Dispenser

You named your kitty stormageddon?!

I've been looking for the like button on that post for hours :(

The TARDIS

  • I wanted to see the Universe so I stole a Time Lord and I ran away.
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  • I'm bigger on the inside!
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1777 on: September 06, 2014, 10:57:21 PM »
Dear Stormageddon,

Laying so your tail is on my face while I'm asleep is not fun. I do not like waking up with your fur in my eyes, nose and mouth. I'm aware you're proud of how fluffy and black you are, but I can appreciate it without having it enter my bodily orifices!

Love,

The Food Dispenser

You named your kitty stormageddon?!

I've been looking for the like button on that post for hours :(

He is definitely the Dark Lord of All.
Who is the Doctor?

Fliss

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1778 on: September 11, 2014, 07:07:44 AM »

Dear friends fuzzy-butt cat:

I know this unknown human came to stay in your house for a few weeks. They also burst into tears every time they looked at your first the first few days, as they thought they would never see the Demon Twins again. You coped remarkably well with the unexpected demands for hugs.

However -- the odd human did provide you with daily amounts of delicious chicken skin for treats from their dinner. But, did you really have to yodel at 3am every morning? The weird human was already under stress and not sleeping well. A daily 3am wake-up call, to try and obtain gooshy fud did not endear you.

However, all survived with only slight annoyances regarding lack of sleep. And seeing you being beaten up by the local magpie squadron did provide amusement.
Good news! Your insurance company says they'll cover you. Unfortunately, they also say it will be with dirt.

Fliss

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1779 on: September 11, 2014, 07:44:09 AM »

Dear Demons:

Oh, my beautiful, handsome, wonderful boys . . .

I know you had a traumatic 4 weeks, after mummy and daddy had a huge fight and mummy vanished. While the humans involved dealt with all the emotions, we couldn't explain it to you. I know you freaked out. It broke mummys heart when she thought she might never see you ever again, more than you can ever know. Much worse than you dying.

The reaction when mummy returned had everyone in tears as well. You should have been well asleep at 1am, not busting through the back door, knocking mummy flying, and yodelling your hearts out while dancing over her and smothering her in drool and kisses for 40 minutes.

You also wouldn't let mummy out of your sight for 2 days, which was fine in bed and the rest of the house. But it did provide a few problems when going to the loo or having a shower, but we got around it. (noses were shoved under the toilet door, and they took up station, one either side of the shower curtain, just in case I decided to escape down the drain).

You're still freaking out slightly every time I leave the house, but you're improving. And I'm making sure you get as many hugs and cuddles as you can stand, as often as you want them.

It has been a traumatic event for all concerned. And although you didn't grow, you seemed HUGE when I came back. Certainly heavier and more muscled.

It has been a long 4 weeks.......


Good news! Your insurance company says they'll cover you. Unfortunately, they also say it will be with dirt.

ladyknight1

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  • Not all those who wander are lost
Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1780 on: September 11, 2014, 07:46:06 AM »
Aww. They love you too.
ďAll that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost."
-J.R.R Tolkien

Nikko-chan

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1781 on: September 17, 2014, 09:21:34 PM »
Dear Ciaran,

No you cannot have my hot pocket. No looking cute will not work, you think this is the first time this has happened to me? Think again. No, quit trying to put your paws on my plate... yeesh

Love,

Mama, provider of gooshy food

greencat

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1782 on: September 18, 2014, 09:01:08 AM »
Dear Siamese kittens,

I was walking the dog.  I don't think half-grown kittens normally need walking, but you followed me all around the neighborhood.  Of course, there were some signs that you were not so much following me as you guys were stalking the dog like the velociraptors from Jurassic park.   I may have to get you guys harnesses and leashes and see how you do...

Love,

The human

Black Delphinium

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1783 on: September 18, 2014, 09:11:20 AM »
Dear Siamese kittens,

I was walking the dog.  I don't think half-grown kittens normally need walking, but you followed me all around the neighborhood.  Of course, there were some signs that you were not so much following me as you guys were stalking the dog like the velociraptors from Jurassic park.   I may have to get you guys harnesses and leashes and see how you do...

Love,

The human
Might be a novel way to get them adopted out.  ;D
When angels go bad, they go worse than anyone. Remember, Lucifer was an angel. ~The Marquis De Carabas

PastryGoddess

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1784 on: September 18, 2014, 10:49:24 AM »
I walk one of my cats on a harness.  Best way to meet people ever!