Dear Princess Rita, great furry love of my life,
You've lived with me 6 years, ever since I got you out of the shelter. You rule my life with an Iron Paw, but you really need to learn that when the alarm goes off at 4am, limbs WILL flail, and you WILL be knocked off the bed where you are watching me sleep peacefully. It's best that you learn to move very fast when that alarm goes off!
And let me explain this again: The little bag is YOUR treats. The big bag is MY treats (dried apricots). I know they have the same form and the same crinkle, and I even let you sniff one of MY treats, but you still looked shocked and horrified when I popped one into my mouth. They are not your treats! You didn't like them! I gave you some of yours, and still you got all upset when you saw me eating out of the bag.
*sigh* Okay. I'll put them in a bowl next time.