S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat

[Mental Magpie]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?


An addendum to the dog:
I know you like to sleep in there, but can you not sleep right in front of the toilet?  I need to put my feet there.

He's just trying to keep your feet warm 

[ShanghaiJill]

It's a keyboard.

Not a bed.

[Venus193]

Dear Carmen and Figaro,

Please stop the rowdy behaviour in the middle of the night and just before dawn.  You are not in the jungle and I need some sleep even if I don't benefit from it as you do.

She who provides the Fancy Feast.

[guihong]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?


An addendum to the dog:
I know you like to sleep in there, but can you not sleep right in front of the toilet?  I need to put my feet there.

Dog=portable bathroom rug 

[Elfmama]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?


An addendum to the dog:
I know you like to sleep in there, but can you not sleep right in front of the toilet?  I need to put my feet there.

Dog=portable bathroom rug 

But not very useful when you're stepping out of the shower.  

Tasha HATED the bathroom -- it was where you got BATHS, for heaven's sake! She would never go in there on her own, not even to drink out of the toilet.

[greencat]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?


An addendum to the dog:
I know you like to sleep in there, but can you not sleep right in front of the toilet?  I need to put my feet there.

Dog=portable bathroom rug 

But not very useful when you're stepping out of the shower.  

Tasha HATED the bathroom -- it was where you got BATHS, for heaven's sake! She would never go in there on her own, not even to drink out of the toilet.

My dog usually hates baths, although every once in awhile I guess his skin itching gets to the point where he decides it's a good idea.  He usually gets up and leaves when I turn the shower on for my own use though.

He is also not a good bathroom rug/foot warmer - he usually wakes up and seems offended by my feet being on him, and it's really hard to balance on the toilet when your feet are suddenly elevated from a foot above the floor to above your waist!

[greencat]

Dear Princess:
You are as stealthy as a windchime in a gale.  Cuddling up to my plate and then pretending you're using it as a pillow is not going to get you a bite of my food - besides, I'm not really sure what part of my lunch you're actually interested in eating, since you turn your nose up at hot dogs and bread, and I'm also pretty sure you don't like sauerkraut.

Love,
Your loyal subject.

P.S. getting the sticker off a peach stuck to you made me laugh for the nerd factor.

[MrsVandy]

Dear Gunter,
Your new so here are some rules:
1. Cats don't go in the fridge.
2. Same applies for the cupboards.
3. Mommy will not wake up at 6 am to pet and cuddle you.
4. Play with Jericho, he likes you, Perl does not.
5. You will get fed breakfast at the hour of my choosing.
6. Don't eat my socks.
7. Don't break bottles.

Love CatMommy.

[ZaftigWife]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?

[greencat]

Dear cats - all four of you,

May I please use the bathroom by myself?

I ROFL'd.   

[AnnaT]

No bathroom privacy with only one cat let alone four!

Mine also likes to come running and skid on the shower rug, which makes it hard to step on when getting out of the shower - but absolutely priceless to watch!

[Lynnv]

Dear Harry & Bob (especially Harry),

Having cats means having to tape roll any clothing you own if you want it to be mostly hair-free when you leave the house.  I can live with that.  I have to say that your ability, Bob, to shed such that every kind of clothing shows your fur (since you are black AND white) is somewhat annoying.

But Harry, the fact that I have to tape roll my pillows is just wrong.  And it is your fault.  We have ceded an entire pillow to you, but you insist on sleeping on my pillow when I am not around to shoo you off.  Believe me, the fur on the pillow gives you away.  Stop it.  Just stop it.

Thanks.

She who feeds you and clips your claws (and tape rolls her pillows)

[magicdomino]

Dear Harry & Bob (especially Harry),

Having cats means having to tape roll any clothing you own if you want it to be mostly hair-free when you leave the house.  I can live with that.  I have to say that your ability, Bob, to shed such that every kind of clothing shows your fur (since you are black AND white) is somewhat annoying.

But Harry, the fact that I have to tape roll my pillows is just wrong.  And it is your fault.  We have ceded an entire pillow to you, but you insist on sleeping on my pillow when I am not around to shoo you off.  Believe me, the fur on the pillow gives you away.  Stop it.  Just stop it.

Thanks.

She who feeds you and clips your claws (and tape rolls her pillows)

Dear Koa,

This is why I insist that you nap on the old sheet that I spread over the bed each morning.  Please don't pull it off.

Thank you,

The bedwarmer.

[Amara]

Dear Harry & Bob (especially Harry),

Having cats means having to tape roll any clothing you own if you want it to be mostly hair-free when you leave the house.  I can live with that.  I have to say that your ability, Bob, to shed such that every kind of clothing shows your fur (since you are black AND white) is somewhat annoying.

But Harry, the fact that I have to tape roll my pillows is just wrong.  And it is your fault.  We have ceded an entire pillow to you, but you insist on sleeping on my pillow when I am not around to shoo you off.  Believe me, the fur on the pillow gives you away.  Stop it.  Just stop it.

Thanks.

She who feeds you and clips your claws (and tape rolls her pillows)

Dear Koa,

This is why I insist that you nap on the old sheet that I spread over the bed each morning.  Please don't pull it off.

Thank you,

The bedwarmer.

Dear Girls,

And this is why I feel I must keep the comforter on the bed upside down. It is cream. You are all black. Do you have any idea how hard it is to vacuum a comforter without sucking it up? Why would you? You are all under the sofa. And all the fur is out here.

Grumpily,

Mom

[camlan]

Dear Harry & Bob (especially Harry),

Having cats means having to tape roll any clothing you own if you want it to be mostly hair-free when you leave the house.  I can live with that.  I have to say that your ability, Bob, to shed such that every kind of clothing shows your fur (since you are black AND white) is somewhat annoying.

But Harry, the fact that I have to tape roll my pillows is just wrong.  And it is your fault.  We have ceded an entire pillow to you, but you insist on sleeping on my pillow when I am not around to shoo you off.  Believe me, the fur on the pillow gives you away.  Stop it.  Just stop it.

Thanks.

She who feeds you and clips your claws (and tape rolls her pillows)

Dear Koa,

This is why I insist that you nap on the old sheet that I spread over the bed each morning.  Please don't pull it off.

Thank you,

The bedwarmer.

Dear Girls,

And this is why I feel I must keep the comforter on the bed upside down. It is cream. You are all black. Do you have any idea how hard it is to vacuum a comforter without sucking it up? Why would you? You are all under the sofa. And all the fur is out here.

Grumpily,

Mom

Dear Fred,

This is why there are two pillowcases on every pillow. The outer one's for you to shed all over, and the inner one's for me to sleep on. And why there is a strategically placed throw on your favorite corner of the bed, where you can see out both windows and also keep an eye on traffic in the hallway and monitor what's going on in the kitchen.

You have three cat beds. I've protected 3/4 of my bed. Could you please stop throwing up hair balls on the remaining uncovered 1/4 of the comforter?

Thank you,

The laundress.