To: Amara, Athena, Aphrodite
From: The Staff AKA Mom AKA Killer of Food Cans AKA Cleaner of Sandbox
Re: New Comforter
Date: January 22, 2013
Thank you for admiring my taste in comforters. I appreciate the confirmation of my taste. I agree that the silk-like sheen and exquisite design are perfect. The mint green color is so flattering to your eyes as well, but that's not actually why I bought it. Still, it is nice.
If I may be so bold, I would like to request that you refrain from doing your favorite rolls around with claws out. Your ability to draw threads out is ... uncanny. Also, throwing up your dinner (and breakfast and lunch) whenever you feel a need is not something to be done on the comforter. I have laminate wood flooring for a reason; please use that. And while I am not happy with the addition of bits of cat litter I realize that your paws need to dispense the excess somewhere so I am (grumpily) willing to accept that some will end up here. I'll deal with it. Just, please, do not make me deal with vomit, hairballs or--Aphrodite, I am speaking to you--an occasional
message turd if you think I have not hastened with sufficient speed to clean the sandbox.
I like this comforter. In fact, I love it. So I request, with all due respect, adoration, and admiration, that you let me enjoy it as it is now.
Mom (the dispatcher of cans and used litter)