Author Topic: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat  (Read 186536 times)

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*inviteseller

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1080 on: July 17, 2013, 11:02:52 PM »
Dear Phinneus (formerly mathilda  oops),
I was so glad that you took the time to stalk and get that moth at 4 this morning.  How ever would I have lived with it in my house?  And thanks for making sure I was awake to see this brave act,  sorry I came flying down the steps looking like a crazy lady..for all the noise your 4 lb self was making, I thought I was being invaded.  Of course, I am happy you saved your final acrobatic feat for me to see when you launched yourself at the moth, who made the mistake of landing on the curtain.  It was as if time stood still as I watched you go swinging on my favorite summer drapes, so Tarzan like, with the sound of it ripping straight across.  I appreciate the new look of one side being a drape, the other side, now just a valance.   The lamp is cracked, the drapes are shot, but gosh darnit, that evil moth was caught!

Sincerely,
The lady that thinks you are too crazy and I will never find you a permanent home

AnnaT

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1081 on: July 18, 2013, 01:19:28 AM »
[Like Button]  ;D

Venus193

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1082 on: July 19, 2013, 08:31:30 AM »
Dear Carmen and Figaro,

It's too hot to cuddle right now.  Please remember that because you get your shedding hair all over your human mum who then has to take a cold bath to get it off.

And Figaro, please don't object when Mum wipes you down with cool water on a paper towel.  It's too hot for any of us and that cools you off.  Just don't lick it off and you'll be fine.

Love,

Your unemployed mum who loves you very much

*inviteseller

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1083 on: July 19, 2013, 02:01:43 PM »
Dear Madelyne,
  I thought you were the good one!!!  I loved that lamp!  I was willing to pay big bucks just to have it!  I told my own children what horrible things would rain down on their heads if anything happened to it!  When you dove on the table and lost your footing (you are not a graceful kitten!)  I saw it tipping, and it was like a movie scene..everything went slow motion..the lamp wobbling, me yelling noooooooo and trying to get to it, then it hitting the floor, smashing into more pieces than I thought it could.  At least you didn't look proud as your brother did when he destroyed the drapes, but then you performed the encore of racing up stairs, diving on my dresser and wiping out all my Knick Knacks and picture frames.  I surrender..you 2 will have my house in a pile of rubble before I find you homes !

Signed,
The lady bubble wrapping everything

PS..It is 93 degrees, I don't have air..quit sleeping on my darn face!
« Last Edit: July 19, 2013, 03:31:26 PM by *inviteseller »

Amara

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1084 on: July 19, 2013, 03:01:57 PM »
Oooh, *inviteseller, that is bad! I am so sorry.

I recently found and bought a lovely lace tablecloth at my favorite thrift store. Never mind that it was only $10, I love it. But I didn't put it on the table for several days for exactly that reason until I remembered that none of my three have been on that table for a while. Not because they don't want to but because they have gotten older. They are now 12, 11, and 10 years old so they don't even try to jump that far anymore. Thank goodness; there are benefits to older kitties.

*inviteseller

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1085 on: July 19, 2013, 03:32:49 PM »
Yeah..no table clothes here..obviously I can't have drapes, lamps, picture frames, a good nights sleep...

Liliane

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1086 on: July 19, 2013, 06:51:31 PM »
Dear Branwen the Awful,

Oh cat. Look. I love you to death, cat. Why else would I keep buying you expensive canned food to treat you in addition to the dry food that's always out? And I know you adore that food - you shove your face right in the dish and inhale it like you haven't been fed in weeks!

But while I love you dearly, I really don't love when you eat so fast that you then proceed to deposit your just-inhaled food on the floor in a disgusting heap. And I REALLY don't love when you stand over it, pawing disdainfully at the floor as if trying to cover it up, so I can't clean it up before it dries into the carpet. You only weigh twelve pounds, cat, and I weigh a hundred and two, so don't look so offended when I bodily move you away from the mess.

Get over it, cat. And please eat a little bit slower, will you?

Dear Rika the Angry Fluff,

Why in the seven bloody hells do YOU not eat canned food or treats?! I would be very happy if you would even deign to push it away with a paw and walk off! Or even sniff it! But no, you avoid it like it threatened to give you a bath! You picky little ball of angry fluff! You're just lucky you're adorable and I don't mind when you try to eat my spicy crisps...but please keep your head out of the bag next time, you little brat.

Love, that warm clumsy thing that feeds and brushes and pets you.
~I'm just standing with you, in the darkness between battles~


stargazer

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1087 on: July 19, 2013, 09:09:06 PM »
Dear Mouse,

What in the world did you get into last night?  Your poor paw pad is torn and bloody.  I'm sorry about the vet but it was necessary.  Nice guilt job with the crying though.   Luckily he doesn't think there is anything stuck in it and gave you a pain shot and antibiotics.  Don't give me looks when I don't let you outside for the next couple of days.  Until you stop limping or lifting your paw you are on lockdown inside.   

Fliss

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1088 on: July 19, 2013, 09:47:39 PM »
Dear Sam

I realise that as a young rotty, you have lots of energy. Far more than I can burn off by taking walks every morning. However -- this does not mean you need to try and dig Australia's newest open sky mine in the backyard every morning.

So far, your deepest attempt in only a metre, and the rhumba that your tail and backside were doing as the only visible part of you out of the hole was cute. But it has to stop! If you dug up near the dead tree stump, we wouldn't mind, but you insist on digging right in the middle of the drive, and if I don't find and fill one in time, we're going to break an axle.

In short -- you aren't contracted to a mining company, and there's no ores of ANY sort in the yard. So please, enough digging already!

The shovel wielder.
Good news! Your insurance company says they'll cover you. Unfortunately, they also say it will be with dirt.

greencat

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1089 on: July 19, 2013, 11:49:24 PM »
Dear Princess,

My head is not for sleeping on.  For that matter, my pillow is for my head, not for you.  I'm already having respiratory issues (which are much better now after my first day on antibiotics and steroids!) and having a face full of cat does not help.

Love,

The person trying to breathe.

Ms Marple

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1090 on: July 20, 2013, 07:57:50 AM »
Ms Neenah Cat advises that breathing is overrated.  ;D

fabric-dragon

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1091 on: July 20, 2013, 08:58:12 AM »
Dear Branwen the Awful,

I am forcing Mommy to come out of lurkdom to send you this message.  Tell your Mommy to spread your yummy gushy food  on a big plate.  My Mommy does this with my gushy foods to force me to slow down.  It helps to keep the yummys in my tummy. 

Yours in love of gushy foods
Grizel the Invincible

missanpan

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1092 on: July 20, 2013, 12:52:28 PM »
Dear Kimmie-cat, a.k.a. Kimmie-bean,

How in the world did you know that I intended to take you and Momo to the vet's office? I didn't even say the words vet, shot or cat carrier. Heck, I didn't even make a move towards the closet where the carriers are kept. And yet there you were, hiding under the bed refusing to come out. Luckily, Momo is a bit dim and couldn't figure out why you were hiding out.

From she who begs for forgiveness for the horrible vet visit transgression.

*inviteseller

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1093 on: July 20, 2013, 01:01:33 PM »
Dear Kimmie-cat,
Oh our silly owners think we don't know, but we can read minds.  Next time, if your food giver gets you out from under the bed, do what we do..grow 6 more legs and spread them all out so they can't get you in the carrier. 

Purrs and Head Butts,
Mr. B, Sophie, Lola, & Jezebel

Liliane

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Re: S/O Dear Dog...Dear Cat
« Reply #1094 on: July 20, 2013, 01:16:10 PM »
Dear Grizel the Invincible,

Not-Furry One is already threatening to mash my food to the bottom of my dish so I have to WORK at it. I like the plate idea better. I will pass it on, along with a good dose of my very favorite kitty stinkeye that she would even THINK about making me WORK for my food. Hmph.

Viva la gooshy,
Branwen the Not So Awful No Really
~I'm just standing with you, in the darkness between battles~