General Etiquette > Techno-quette

Ex-students on Facebook

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dizzygoround:
I've been a high school teacher for almost a decade, and sometimes I get FB friend requests from former students of mine. I always accept them, as I tend to have fond memories of them and I'm always curious to know what they've been up to.

However. I have recently had a request from a young man we'll call Jake. When I taught Jake (about 2 years ago) he was appallingly behaved in my lessons, refused to follow my instructions, spoke inappropriately to me, threw tantrums when I punished him, did not work to his potential... you get the idea. Furthermore, his mother believed he could do no wrong, and he simply ran to her for protection whenever I (or any teacher) tried to discipline him. All teacher ehellions will know that trying to deal with a poorly-behaved student without parental support is extremely difficult.

I do not want this boy (he'd be about 15 now) to have any access to me or my private life. I figure if he couldn't treat me with respect when I was his teacher, why should I accept him as a "friend" now? I ignored his request. But... there are several other kids from his school on my friend list, and he knows this, so it probably looks unfair. Also, he sent me a message 2 weeks after I ignored his request, saying "Hi Miss Dizzy! hahaha" (that's it.)

Should I tell this boy that I do not want any contact with him, and why? And do you think I'm being unfair to to not want anything to do with such a young kid?

enjoyetiquettehell:
I am curious what other have to say. I am wondering if it is even appropriate that you have former students on your facebook especially if they are still in school.

dizzygoround:
Appropriate? Well, I suppose I don't see it as being much different to the teachers I kept in touch with by letter or email when I was a kid. FB is, for me, merely a tool for keeping in touch (though I realise it's much more than that for some people). And there's really nothing about my private life which would be inappropriate for these kids to see, it's just that I want this particular kid at arm's length.

MissRose:
If i was a teacher, and any former students asked to friend me on a social site, I would friend them if I had no issues with them from the past.  I've not actively seeked out any of my former teachers from my school & uni years, and I am sure if any of them were on Facebook they would have no issue accepting requests.  I've not actively sought out any former classmates but some have come up as suggestions to add them but I'm not ready to do that yet.

charlotte26:
Any student that has graduated would be okay but any student that still is in the school system should not be on
your facebook. My district has warned its teachers not to have facebook pages because of problems it can create.

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