There are a few people in my social circle who are a bit clueless when it comes to interactions, and tend to say rather dense things. I also have a bit of a curse--I attract comments to which the only response is to stare and say "Did you seriously just say that to me?" I've gotten fairly good at replying, but sometimes I'm either shocked into silence, or rude in the moment.
A guy I knew once saw fit to inform me, "So-and-so is prettier than you, but you're a better person." I was a bit appalled by this, but didn't say anything. The next time someone said something like that, a guy who was a friend of mine said "Of all the girls here, I'm least attracted to you." I said, "Why on earth would you say that to me?" He realised what he'd said and tried to explain what he'd meant was, I didn't need to worry about him hitting on me! The ironic thing here is that he later changed his mind, and we dated for a year. (He wasn't actually as bad as the comment makes him sound, just a real case of meaning one thing and the wrong thing coming out. I definitely teased him about it for months though.)
For example, I was at work one time when a girl I know a bit outside of work came in. When she saw me, she gasped, "Oh my god, what's wrong? You look terrible!" I just blinked at her, and said "Actually, I'm feeling fine." "You have huge dark circles under your eyes!" she replied, still sounding like she was about to call an ambulance for me right then. "Thanks so much," I replied, not very polite I admit, and turned back to my work. She immediately tried to backtrack, and I shrugged it off.
The latest time this has happened, I went the direct route. 'Lisa`had a habit of making unflattering observations about me, either telling me she didn`t think something I was wearing was flattering, or pointing something out I already knew. The last time she did it, I turned her and said , `Lisa, do you realise that every time I`ve seen you in the last month, you`ve said something about my appearance?" She kind of blanched and asked, "Always negative?" "Yes" I answered. She apologised and never did it again. I was pretty proud of myself for that one.
Do you guys think these responses are acceptable? What would you have done? I usually try not to cause conflict, but when it's happened more than once I can't help but get a bit...testy!
