When did not having facebook become rude

[Evil Duckie]

This morning my sister called and told me that I am rude and out of date because I do not have a facebook account.

I asked how and she told me that facebook is how families keep in contact anymore because calling or write letters or email is passe so not to have it is terribly rude because it is telling everyone that I do not want to keep in contact.

When did it become rude not to have facebook? Or is this just my sister complaining.

For what it is worth DH (I can use his if I wanted to) and the boys have facebook accounts but I have not so far seen the need to add myself to facebook.

[Hushabye]

It's just your sister complaining.  You're not being rude at all not to have a Facebook account.  Heck, I often lament the day when Facebook went from being a way to keep in touch with your college buddies and transformed into this massive, open social network.    I would just ignore her or just say, "No, I'm not."  What I'd like to add ("The only thing stopping you from picking up the phone or a pen and paper is laziness, and I'm not rude to refuse to cater to it.") is definitely rude, so I'd just go with "No" or ignoring it altogether.

[MrsJWine]

Was she joking?  I mean, I've jokingly needled friends who haven't joined Facebook yet, but it's never been serious.  If she was serious, then she's out of line.  That's just silly.

[Queenie]

This morning my sister called and told me that I am rude and out of date because I do not have a facebook account.

I asked how and she told me that facebook is how families keep in contact anymore because calling or write letters or email is passe so not to have it is terribly rude because it is telling everyone that I do not want to keep in contact.

When did it become rude not to have facebook? Or is this just my sister complaining.

For what it is worth DH (I can use his if I wanted to) and the boys have facebook accounts but I have not so far seen the need to add myself to facebook.

It's not rude just because she thinks it is.  Some people will go to their grave never having had a FB page for whatever reasons, myself among them. 

Yes, it is just your sister complaining and being a nuisance.

[camlan]

This morning my sister called and told me that I am rude and out of date because I do not have a facebook account.

I asked how and she told me that facebook is how families keep in contact anymore because calling or write letters or email is passe so not to have it is terribly rude because it is telling everyone that I do not want to keep in contact.

When did it become rude not to have facebook? Or is this just my sister complaining.

For what it is worth DH (I can use his if I wanted to) and the boys have facebook accounts but I have not so far seen the need to add myself to facebook.

What your sister really told you was that she doesn't want to take  the time to call or email you. She wants to be able to notify everyone all at once, with one message, of anything she thinks is important. The underlying message she's sending, that you aren't worth her time, is far more rude than what she said. This happened in my family, when everyone but my parents got email. Some of my siblings complained a lot that our parents needed to get email. What they really meant was that they didn't want to take the time to print out the email on paper and snail mail the news to our parents.

I got a Facebook account a year ago, just to see what it was all about. None of my friends are on it, so it isn't very useful to me. Some of my younger relatives are on it, but I highly doubt they want their aunt friending them on Facebook. So I don't use the account at all.

[LeeLee88]

Wow, if your sister isn't kidding with you, than she really, rrrrreeeeeeeaaaaaallllyyyyyyyy stretching it right there.  Come on, this is what she's going to use her complain points on?  You aren't rude, sister sounds like she needs to be ignored a bit.

[AmethystAnne]

This morning my sister called and told me that I am rude and out of date because I do not have a facebook account.

I asked how and she told me that facebook is how families keep in contact anymore because calling or write letters or email is passe so not to have it is terribly rude because it is telling everyone that I do not want to keep in contact.

When did it become rude not to have facebook? Or is this just my sister complaining.

For what it is worth DH (I can use his if I wanted to) and the boys have facebook accounts but I have not so far seen the need to add myself to facebook.

What your sister really told you was that she doesn't want to take  the time to call or email you. She wants to be able to notify everyone all at once, with one message, of anything she thinks is important. The underlying message she's sending, that you aren't worth her time, is far more rude than what she said. This happened in my family, when everyone but my parents got email. Some of my siblings complained a lot that our parents needed to get email. What they really meant was that they didn't want to take the time to print out the email on paper and snail mail the news to our parents.

I got a Facebook account a year ago, just to see what it was all about. None of my friends are on it, so it isn't very useful to me. Some of my younger relatives are on it, but I highly doubt they want their aunt friending them on Facebook. So I don't use the account at all.

My brother and sister each sent me an invitation to join Facebook. I didn't want to because it would have meant something else for me to have to keep up with, and I'd rather talk to them on the phone. I guess it does take up less time to do a mass notification.

[Tai]

Oh, no!  Should I tell my 90yo GMIL that she's rude, my MIL that can't figure out how to use google, or my BIL who doesn't own a computer that they're all rude? 

Uh, nope. 

[Valentines Mommy]

I am anti-Facebook.  I have an email address, a home phone, a cell phone and I am happy to visit with people in person.  I spend 10-16 hours a day in front of the computer for work.  I have no desire to add to that by joining Facebook. 

I may be missing out, but almost everyone in my life got over it.

[Amava]

I may have a facebook account, but if people think I am going to check everyone's page every single day just in case they are announcing something "important", they are sadly mistaken.

It's just like the thread about "It was on my blog!"
Posting something on the internet, whether on a personal blog, facebook, myspace, or what ever other places there are, is not a way of notifying all one's friends and family of something.

I think, if one wants their friends / family / colleagues / etc to know something, it would really not be too much to ask to send an email or make a phonecall.

Edited to add: oh, and also! If something happens in my life that I only want certain people to know (my facebook friend circle is rather elaborate), I am most certainly not going to post it on facebook and start messing with all kinds of privacy settings to let just these people know and hide it from others. I will mail or phone to who it concerns. Facebook, to me, is more something for fun and leisure. More like a toy - definitely not a medium for official announcements or something that I allow to become a requirement.

[artk2002]

Tell your sister to grow up.  I hate fanbois and that's what she's being.  "Oh, this is the only way people will ever communicate again." Piffle.  It's like the people who told me, 20 or so years ago, that mainframe computers were dead and the PC was going to bury them.  Funny thing -- IBM makes more money from mainframes than almost any other product and has done so steadily over the last 20 years.  It's like the people who tell you that "programming language X is the best and every program will be written in it in the future."  Then X gets superseded by Y and then by Z; meanwhile, those of us who still use A, B and C are chugging along.

[Ceallach]

Tell your sister to grow up.  I hate fanbois and that's what she's being.  "Oh, this is the only way people will ever communicate again." Piffle.  It's like the people who told me, 20 or so years ago, that mainframe computers were dead and the PC was going to bury them.  Funny thing -- IBM makes more money from mainframes than almost any other product and has done so steadily over the last 20 years.  It's like the people who tell you that "programming language X is the best and every program will be written in it in the future."  Then X gets superseded by Y and then by Z; meanwhile, those of us who still use A, B and C are chugging along.

hehe, it's funny isn't it - people still expect the world to suddenly change and for a piece of technology to completely take over and change our lives forever.   That's just not how it works!  Change is gradual, over many years.  And by that time, there's been more changes that the first lot of people have moved on to....  that's the thing about there being so many different people with different pov in the world.

Facebook is clearly just another option, works well for my family, but we certainly don't accuse the non-FB family members of being rude!  (We do gloat about how we hear everything first though - via FB!)

[MyFamily]

I love Facebook.  I have a nice size number of friends and there are people who I wish would join because it would make it easier for us to communicate with each other.  Even just a "like" on my status from a friend I haven't seen in years makes me smile because of that simple connection. 

My mom and all my siblings are also on facebook, not our dad though.  It is fun for one of us to post something, another comment and then yet another one of us comment as well.  We have a quick, simple interaction that we wouldn't have had otherwise since we are rarely ever able to all be in one place at one time.  But do we think our dad is rude for not joining in the fun?  Nope.  Dad doesn't want to, and that is fine.  We still love him, still e-mail him and still call him on the phone.  I just make sure to e-mail him the pictures of my kids that I post so he isn't missing out, while everyone else gets notified via facebook.

So, yeah, your sister has completely missed the point of it all, and I'd just ignore her.

[MadMadge43]

Hmmm,

I don't think not having FB is rude...yet.

But it does raise a question of when ones non-use of a new technology does become rude. Would some one who didn't have a phone and you had to drive to visit them be considered rude, or take the time to write a letter and the expense to mail it? Would someone who had a phone but didn't have an answering machine be considered rude because people had to keep calling you back? Is someone considered rude because they don't have e-mail and you have to call?

I personally think the phone thing would be rude, or at least special snowflake. I don't want a phone so I'm going to make people go out of their way to get a hold of me.

I guess, if your group communicates a certain way and you choose not to use that communication then you would only be considered rude if you insisted on being kept in the loop and made people go out of their way to contact you.

[Dragons 8 Cactus]

Hmmm,

I don't think not having FB is rude...yet.

But it does raise a question of when ones non-use of a new technology does become rude. Would some one who didn't have a phone and you had to drive to visit them be considered rude, or take the time to write a letter and the expense to mail it? Would someone who had a phone but didn't have an answering machine be considered rude because people had to keep calling you back? Is someone considered rude because they don't have e-mail and you have to call?

I personally think the phone thing would be rude, or at least special snowflake. I don't want a phone so I'm going to make people go out of their way to get a hold of me.

I guess, if your group communicates a certain way and you choose not to use that communication then you would only be considered rude if you insisted on being kept in the loop and made people go out of their way to contact you.

There not making you do anything, it still is your own choice.

[My second bro often has No phone, he is in the tropics and it most often than not fails to work. It doesn't make him rude. He simply found out much later than everyone else when emergancies happen [ Dad's heart attack/ Mum's strokes/ etc. we had to send the info snail mail.]