Author Topic: From E-Hell Blog: Tis Better To Be Big in Body Or Small In Heart? That Is The Qu  (Read 6210 times)

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Asharah

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It’s Rug Rats Week!  All new stories involving bad behaving children.  But as you read, you’ll find that the source of most bad brats are bad parents.  Read on… Asharah's comment: And this is a surprise?

    A few years back, when I still lived with my parents, my mum and I went to the gym. I usually got there before my mum (my college was only about 10mins walk away) and so I usually just waited for her.

    One day, my mum was a bit late so I decided to go in without her. As I was walking down the corridor to the changing rooms behind a woman and her 4 year old daughter, an older lady came out of the toilets ahead of us. This woman was really quite large, and the 4 year old turned to her mum and said loudly, “Mummy, why is that lady so big? Is she having a baby?”

    Now that’s just embarrassing for everyone in earshot (even I went red) but it was understandable - I mean, the girl was 4 and appeared to have asked quite innocently. If it had been my child, I would have apologized profusely and told my daughter not to be so rude and not to comment on other people’s appearances.

    Instead, the mother of this kid said, “No of course not, she’s just very fat”, gave the older lady a filthy look and then brushed past her. When I caught up she was standing there open-mouthed, and turned to me to ask if that had actually happened! (I think I actually apologized myself for this woman’s behavior!)

    What kind of an example is that to set to your daughter? Asharah's comment: A very bad one!    0102-10
Asharah

Perfect Circle

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One of my siblings did something similar at around the same age as the kid in this story. However, my mother's reaction was somewhat different!

I find it hard to understand why some people don't instill good manners on their children from a very early onset. The mother in this story is actively being rude about someone's appearance and signalling it's perfectly fine to her child.

I think you cannot start ensuring good manners too early. My DD is two and is perfectly capable of saying thank you, please and sorry. In fact she's currently apologising when none is due -  the other day in a shop a lady accidentally caught her with her bag and there's DD going 'Ouch. Sorry'.

I did try to explain that sometimes she's owed an apology. But better this way!
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JonGirl

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I really don't understand kids that do this. What are these parents teaching them?
My ds is 5 and he has never even thought to say something like that. Ever.
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Hillia

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I really don't understand kids that do this. What are these parents teaching them?
My ds is 5 and he has never even thought to say something like that. Ever.

When kids are very young, they don't understand that pointing out a fact ("That lady is very big") can be hurtful.  They've learned that it's important to tell the truth, they *are* telling the truth, so what's the big deal?  It's the same as saying, "That lady has a blue dress on".

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twilight

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I think it is pretty normal for kids to say things like that.  I know I was a good one for shouting things like "Why is that man's nose so big?"  There was no malice behind it-just inquisiveness and a lack of understanding that saying things like this could be hurtful.  I certainly was not picking up cues from my parents who were mortified.  I fault the mother for not only not correcting the behavior on the spot but by endorsing it with her own rude commentary.

TylerBelle

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It's shocking and unbelievable that a parent would support a child's (somewhat innocently for them) rude behavior, though it's not uncommon. As I've mentioned previously I'm very short in stature, quite noticeably so, and with the instances I've been ridiculed for my appearance, in a few of them, it's actually been the adult with the child(ren) to instigate / encourage the behavior.
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BabyMama

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One of my coworkers told me a story yesterday. She was doing a presentation at an elementary school and at the time she was pregnant. After she was done with the presentation, a little boy came up and said, "You're pregnant, right?" My coworker affirmed it. "I could tell, because all your fat's in the front." :P

Nora

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One of my coworkers told me a story yesterday. She was doing a presentation at an elementary school and at the time she was pregnant. After she was done with the presentation, a little boy came up and said, "You're pregnant, right?" My coworker affirmed it. "I could tell, because all your fat's in the front." :P

Thank you for my daily helping of adorable!
Just because someone is offended that does not mean they are in the right.

Omega Mu

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Thank goodness my gym does not allow children!

SkyTalon

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I know somewhere in the Special Snowflake thread I posted a story that this reminds me of.

Long story short, a woman purposefully tripped my (very fat) waitressing friend so that she could get free food, in front of her kids, then told said kids something along the lines of "This is why you shouldn't get fat. It makes you a klutz."
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Kendo_Bunny

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I've seen that kind of behavior in gyms before... the kids are fine, but they have mothers or fathers who throw dirty looks at the chunky girl "fouling" their machines. They'll do a double wipedown before they'll touch a machine a larger person has used, like they have fat germs. This woman is probably one of those who can't bear to see such an unsightly thing as a different body in the gym and is likely to try to instill her daughter with the idea that fat = bad and ugly.

Amava

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Thank goodness my gym does not allow children!

I really don't think the problem here was with the child.

claddagh lass

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Parents should really be telling their children such things aren't appropriate.  Little kids are brutally honest and will pipe up to ask questions but should also be instructed in what's acceptable and what's not.

When I was three I asked my Mom why a bald man "had a shiny head?"

Mom apologized to the man for my piping up like that and instructed me saying things like that were not appropriate and could hurt a person's feelings.

Thankfully man found the whole thing hysterical and the rest of the day went off without a hitch.